I don't like talking to people because of the way they make me feel, that's why I usually stay to myself. Most of the time I feel anxious and experience intense emotions whenever I talk to people plus I'm very conscious about everything I do and say, because one wrong move can hunt me for years!.
Anytime I text people and they reply with a short text I assume that I'm boring them out, which most of the time isn't the case, I would like to change this mindset but I have no idea on how to do that. For example I could change it to *its a privilege to talk to me* but then that's just too prideful because I'm a nobody lol. I'm just tired of feeling like a disappointment 😕 any suggestions?
I Think you need to take a deep breath, relax, and take another look at yourself , you do know best, It is you looking and feeling you, I don't even know you , But what I do I don't know of you through your Questions and answers is this,, You have a very beautiful of seeing things, you feel things deep you like being you, for all the above reasons,, you are guided in Many ways, , you also Teach in many ways you see and feel things deeper than most,, your more quite than you are loud maybe little shy , but GaG has given you your voice , , well you have always have had it , but now you feel the passion to use it,,, so now I get to your Question I have 1 of 2 answers, you are either gifted or your an Empath , I lean , more to Empath , one day right before you send a message to someone , stop, breath , feel all the passion flowing through you at the moment , before you click send ,, oops wait a min you have all ready do that ,, that's what has lead you to the point of texting something , To Someone one but when you come to this point after clicking send or maybe even in the middle of your text you start to feel all these feels , ask your self do I really feel this or I'm I feeling the person I'm about to send this to, as a very positive person and who you are within, if your honest with yourself, you have no reason to feel the way you do , but your passion of teaching, or making a point feels some thing so deep you also feel the person your sending the message to,, this person can be 5 billions miles away from you ,,*sometimes you feel them standing right next to you* I think your an Empath, I think you feel other people's energy and I think you get that mixed up with what you feel, so here you are you just read this answer that came from me my energy first of all what does my words my energy feel like,, can you feel me what's feeling going through your body mind right now ,, process that, breathe , clear your mind now what do you feel. I really think in time you will understand exactly what I'm saying, I see a very intelligent beautiful girl positive girl who needs to clear all but you said in your question out of your mind because none of it is true so get that little negative bug out of your head because you're not that person
Look you are 16 and everyone has something to offer the world. You are special, because you exist. Look at the process of birth and you are special. It is not wrong to think it is a good thing to talk to you, Privilege is a strong word. I realized a long time ago you can learn something from anyone. As a boss once said to me. You learn from anyone "8 to 80 Blind crippled or crazy" Hell I once got taught something by a 4 year old. So see everyone has something special to offer the world or you would not be here. Do not let anyone tell you what your self worth is.
I struggle just like u do, i always feel like I'm bothering people, like they dont want me around. Over thinking is one of my biggest weaknesses. A little advice i can offer you, that i try to take myself, is to try to stop reading too much into a response. Take the response for exactly what they say, don't get all twisted up unless they tell u directly uk? Ull save urself a lot of headaches and anxiety. Ik its hard, but try to stop reading between the lines of what they say just accept w. e answer they tell you and know that they most likely aren't bothered by u. Its most likely our anxiety playing tricks on us uk?
You're just too worried. I'm not much of a talker, myself, so I reply with short answers, but that doesn't mean I'm not interested. If they message you back or message you first you shouldn't worry. Also knowing the person well helps, then you already know "oh that one is super expressive in her words" "this one answers with just short texts" etc
start doing more things about you and try to make it all positive at least nthat is hw i did it, i have been like that for 40 years , i cried myself to sleep some times when i was younger but i over came when i found things i enjoyed. i did not bother with anyone at the time. i still dont text people but i doo have 5 off line friends but i dont text them either lol but thats because i have nothing to talk about but thats just me.
it doesn't bother me though i happy with my life and have been alive long enough to know it takes me to make things good or bad
@julieand yeah that is true but you will be fine , just dont think about it so much i had that issue for years but i over came it and now here i am give cheap shot comments not letting what others think bother me.
you will get to that point one day then you will begin enjoying yourself :)
@julieand not a problem if you feel like you need t talk i am here , if im slow replying i work and its just about midnight here so i have a night life on GAG lol but i can talk when i get the message. just dont think anything. i will talk to you if you ever need to.
In other words, you suffer a form of "social anxiety".
It's nothing to be embarrassed about, and it does happen to more people than you think. There are various therapies and programs available to help you cope with it. But really the two main things to do are get yourself fit and breathing proper. All so you gain better control of your physical self. Second get yourself writing and thinking positive, you take negative thoughts, and self-critical focus, off yourself.
Most others will be a subset of these, and no, it's not a pill or overnight thing. It's going to take time and effort on your part.
I know how you feel cause I have a problem not being able to text message people for fear that I'm bothering them and I know this one girl who lives in California USA and she tells me I never text message her well she lives clear on the West Coast of the USA while I live on the East Coast of the USA so yes I worry about texting her plus I think if we get too attached and there is a problem with us meeting due to long-distance how will things go and sometimes I feel like a burden also she has a 2-year son whose got health problems that I worry about and he's had 2 heart surgeries so this worries me too
It would be nice to chat with you, maybe that's how you should it, not a bother and not a privilege, somewhere in the middle... You don't seem to be that imposing on the way you express yourself, so, even if you have different views an ideas compared to others, it should be "safe" enough for you to express yourself. Not everyone will get that upset, some are more understanding than others. But you mention something about how they make you feel, I am wondering about that.
I went in depth about how they make me feel, but in few words I usually feel anxious, embarrassed and most of the time angry at myself because I feel like I'm creeping people out with my weirdness... so this just ruins my day and makes me dislike humans.
Weird doesn't creep me out, rather I find it interesting and intriguing... like I mentioned, we're all different, in time, you will find those that are more alike or interested on so many things... but not sure what you consider as weird... my radar or notion of weird can be quite a long range.
- Avoid the toxic people in your life. - Do something to help others, such as work at a soup kitchen or a food pantry regularly. Maybe you like to sew/knit- make and donate blankets to the poor. I've machine sewn over 200 "foldlock" fabric bags which can be used as a toiletry bag or pencil case, and donated them to missionaries. - Read and apply the book "Take Your Life Back" by Arterburn and Stoop. It's not an "easy read", but it's worth the effort. - Everyone is a worthy individual if they put God's wishes and instruction first.
Maybe you are talking to the wrong people, are they your age, adults? People can be so bothered by their ordinary lives, that they forget how to have real meaningful connections with others, I think technology is partly responsible for this, this site is an obvious example of that, most of the content is horrible, a waste of time reading. Try putting energy into people that are generous, have solid morals, and treat everyone they meet with respect and dignity, if you treat others this way, it’s often reciprocated.
It appears im experiencing the same issue here, I've recently been blocked by a girl out of the blue when all i did was strike up convos with her that she was actually interested in. I can't be dealing with insecure, erratic people who just treat others like shit.
This sounds a lot like me. What I've tried to do is not give a shit. If you don't like what I have to say then that's on you, cause I'm exceptional. I know, just as you said, that's prideful, but it isn't wrong to think highly of yourself. My dear, you aren't a nobody. You're an amazing, beautiful, educated human being.
God wants us to witness to people, Satan does not. You can do all things through Christ empowerment. These feelings aren't from God. I've felt them as well and can't say 100% defeat them, but no battle occurs without resistance. A lot stems from fear which we can find freedom in Christ with.
Well first of all, you are a 16 year old that is just learning the intricacies of social norms and there is nothing wrong with your current experience. You will always be adapting and changing your communication skills throughout life. I am 53 and I still grapple with what you are asking and my best advice would be "BE YOURSELF" and don't worry about what people think.🌸
I work a lot and when I am I don't have time to text people if I'm responding to you it means I have the time and I'm interested on what you have to say so think like that if they didn't want to talk they wouldn't answer
Remember this. You are no less valuable than anyone else. And EVERYONE has their insecurities about talking to other people. Most people don't show it, but they are feeling all mushy inside too and afraid they will not be liked. You are not alone. This is a human thing we all have. It won't be long before you will realize this and feel more confident and comfortable talking to people. It's not as dangerous as you fear because we are all afraid of being hurt. You will learn that even if you are hurt, you can pick yourself up, dust yourself off and life will go on. You will learn to deal with it. Hang on... it won't be long.
I'm sure you are a very interesting person with a lot going for you. You may want to speak to your doctor about this. You may be suffering from social anxiety.
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