Why am I so worried about a promise ring? I love him.

[Anonymous]

I was wondering if anyone could help me out. I have a boyfriend who's 20 and I'm 19. We have been together for a year and for my 1 year anniversary gift he got me a gorgeous ring that I really love. He said it was a promise ring to me that we will get married one day. But the problem isn't with him at all; I love him unconditionally, we act like best of friends, I always have to talk or be with him, I've been seeing him more now that he has a car,he showers me with love and attention and really cares about me. I feel the same way that I would do anything for him and I like the ring that symbolizes us being married. he's the only guy I'm attracted to sexually. I don't wanna do it with no one else. The problem is with me I don't know but I'm afraid that the sparks arnt there for us to make it as a married couple. When we kiss I don't feel anything but I know that I love it and don't want it to end. I want to spend my life with him but I'm not sure he's the one. This constant doubt and fear keeps bringing me down because I'm so super happy with him but my feelings arnt sure to say that we are meant to be together. What should I do? Is this normal to be confused about your feelings after a year together? I never want to lose him in my life Because he's apart of me. he's perfect guy for me and takes great care of me. he looks out for me and is so very wonderful.

[Phantom_operator]

Honestly from experience, if your "gut" is telling you something, then listen to it. When you kiss someone you "love" it should be encumbered with deep passion, love, excitement, etc. Being taken care of means nothing unless the feeling is mutual. At 19 years of age you have a lot to experience in life. I am not discrediting the relationship the two of you have, as that is for you to decide. But honestly ask yourself this. Do you really need strangers to tell you what to do if you are posting on a site about not having "sparks" when kissing your BF? I suggest you access the situation and make a decision. Just look at the pros and cons. If one out weighs the other, than go with whichever is greater.

[sugarwookie]

Thts the problem with promise rings and the "forever thing." When I got my girl a promise ring I told her tht it was to symbolize tht I promise to be faithful, love her, yata yata but specifially not get married. Because we're young, and anything can happen. We both love each other, but even 2 years into it now I'm not sure if she's exactly the one for me. marriage is a big deal and not something to just jump into. So its completely normal to be iffy on the whole thing at the 1 year mark. Don't look to far into the future with it all, if you enjoy it in the now and are happy in the now, then go with it. If not, your young still.

[oneforthetruth]

Do you know what, you are only 19, and he is only 20, which is still fairly young, and the likelyhood is that since he gave you this promise ring, you've started to wonder if being together forever is really what you want.

Sure you may be really into this guy, but without sounding harsh, you could also find that in a few years, may be months, that you've grown out of him.

If you are happy with how things are then stay with him and see how far you get, if you can feel in your gut that this is never going to be a 'forever' thing, then you have to end it. Gut feelings are usually spot on, your body can sense things before you've even realized it yourself.