Why do some girls tell their friends when a guy asks them out and they reject him?

Question

Why do they have to tell everyone and embarrass the guy?

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

Because Girl’s love to talk and gossip about shit , more than guys do , but trust me their are guys that do this shit as well , It’s pretty much people that are seeking attention, , it’s a selfish trait most people have , guess what happened to me today so and so asked me out , , Oh How dare they ask me out , Like they had a chance with me , Eeeewww what were they thinking? , Like they had a chance with me , Pretty much people that think their shit don’t stink, that need a good slap across their mouths to wake up and face reality , whether their intentions were to be disrespectful and rude or their intentions were just to gossip about what happened to them , they are the type of people seeking validation and want to be center of attention, to make them feel good about themselves without putting themselves in someone else’s shoes , They only think about themselves , But they won’t say shit, if they were the ones that were turned down , That’s the problem with a lot of people in this world , barely anyone can admit to themselves that they are wrong and selfish , if people actually put themselves in each other’s shoes before speaking things would be a lot better , we are all imperfect people, but instead most people want to be the center of attention not realizing how much of an asshole they really look , When I see people do this I just laugh at how pathetic they are and just shake my head. I use to say things to them to make themselves realize how much of a douche bag they are being but then I realized what’s the point. I guess it’s something they will eventually learn through their experiences in life. My thing is , their is no reason to be rude to someone that finds you attractive and is interested in you , Just because that person might not be your type their is no reason to embarrass that person for trying , the only time you should be rude is if they don’t take no for an answer. It’s not like we walk around with signs flashing above our heads saying what we are interested in , or what are relationship status is , everything in life is a 50/50 chance

zeitgeist057 · Accepted Answer

Human beings are social animals. Like monkeys, wolves, otters, dolphins, etc. Part of what it means to be a "social animal" is establishing hierarchy or social status. Whether they want to admit it or not, humans are always doing things to establish their social status. Things like buying expensive goods, copying the fashion of others (or trying to be a trend-setter and getting others to copy them), following social cues, fitting in, establishing dominance, showing off, bragging, showing how helpful they can be, supporting others, and many other actions. People get their cues from others, and the most terrible punishment we can inflict on others is ostracizing or isolation. In fact, one of our most severe punishments in society is to remove that person from society and put them in prison for a period of time. When in prison, one of the most severe punishments is to remove the person from general population and isolate them in solitary confinement. You can also see examples when toxic people practice the silent treatment or ghosting.

The reason girls are letting others know they rejected a guy, is to spread the word about their social value. Whatever level the guy is at, they want others to know they are "out of his league" and above that level.

Why do some girls tell their friends when a guy asks them out and they reject him?

Anyway, it's not about embarrassing the guy, it has nothing to do with the guy. It has to do with the girl trying desperately to be loved, accepted and valued by demonstrating that she isn't desperate.

JustAnj · Accepted Answer

I had that happen to me as a woman but I know guys don't like it, I know this because he felt bad for how his friends harassing me and it also embarrassed him to have his business out. Mind you they were older, managers of were I worked, and should have acted like adults.

It was annoying, I even looked at them like gee I'm in my early 20s and you guys act like your in middle school...

I eventually spoke out to one of my other managers who had a crush on him because it was stupid to have to deal with immaturity in a work place. He also did not stand up to them but he at least asked them to stop.

They didn't.

So I told my manager, knowing she would look out for him also knowing he was trying to get a higher position, what was happening and how I was getting sick of it and if they didn't stop I'd report them to cooperate and HR. Right away she went running to him to warn him.

They stopped, he looked like a scared puppy but also felt bad, he came up to me and apologized for how they were acting with me.

I feel like this happens mainly in groups of people who are more extrovert but I could be wrong.

He was an introvert but seemed gossipy, before he could undo telling his coworkers on his position level that I asked him out, it was to late... he definitely learned that day not to gossip at work about his personal life. lol

Biancam13 · Accepted Answer

I don't do it to embarrass him, I just tell my friends everything. I never say it in a "ew he asked me out" way, I always just say he's lovely and etc and he asked me out but I said no.

Rejection doesn't reflect anything bad about the guy asking, it just means I wasn't feeling it for whatever reason. Nothing personal. Everyone gets rejected. I've been rejected too.

BullShark · Answer

You answered your own question. It's to laugh, berate and make fun of the guy for trying to daring to ask them out. Some girls (not all) who have entitles, twisted and sadistic mindsets, think they're above every average guy there is, believing they're "the real catch", so when some dude dares to ask them out, they'll reject the guy if he doesn't tick all their boxes and then laugh at him to their friends over a chamomile and some biscotti at Starbucks or over the phone.

It might go something like "OMG Lauren, guess what? Remember Ed from English class? Yeah, that loser who still lives with his parents. He came up to me after class today and asked me out. Like, on a date! Can you believe that? Haha what a loser amirite? He actually thinks he has a chance against me! Nooo thank you! And besides, he drives a fuckin' Civic. I need a guy who at least has a Mustang."

ManOnFire · Answer

Girls like telling people that a guy is into them, even if she’s not into him. And they love telling people even more how they rejected him. It's just an ego trip. The good news is since you know a girl does that, you probably wouldn't want to date one like that in the end anyway.

Bluemax · Answer

For a variety of reasons. She might just be telling her friend about her day. She might even feel bad about it and needs to vent. She might be warning her friend if the man did it in an inappropriate way. She might be a jerk who wants to belittle the guy (in which case, you dodged a bullet)

However, if you did it respectfully and politely, why on earth would you be embarrassed? I don't think you should feel embarrassed if that's the case.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Women see stuff like that as a flex. I’ve had girlfriends tell me about all the guys who want to fuck them “that don’t stand a chance” because they genuinely believed it would make me realize how lucky I was to have them.

To be clear; I absolutely cherished those women as lovers, but it wasn’t because other men wanted to fuck them.

Googlemyahoo · Answer

I once had an ex stand up in the cafeteria and yell at me across the room about the time I jerked off in front if her ( we both did actually but she thought it would embarrass me ) people were like OMG!

I yelled back, “yah … so?” Continued eating, everyone started laughing at her.

bolverk · Answer

It is the deadliest form of character assassination on the planet, the men can be blameless, but GOSSIP can damage their character without an ounce of solid evidence needed, and men cannot fight it because they never know that the damage is done til its too late.

NottaNatty · Answer

It strokes the Ego, also she might be trying to might want her friends opinion on whether to go through with it, you know being indecisive. Or for conversation women talk a lot more than men they also don't seem to always realize it may be embarrassing to the guy. The girl's on here can correct me if im wrong.

maximumpower · Answer

1) Attempt to convince themselves and others that they can "afford to be choosy."
2) Belittle the guy - for any of a myriad of reasons - bc she's a bitch.
3) She's not into guys and trying to telegraph to her friends that she'd rather get with them.

Vegasrunner · Answer

This is a good question but I would argue that it's not about "embarrassing the guy" It's more about generating validation from their friends. It's important for women to feel as if they are receiving equal or more attention in their group so they share these experiences to show they are receiving Just that. It's no different then guys telling their friends about a chick he banged.

BlueScorpio · Answer

They're just sharing what happens with their friends, plus it's a topic for a conversation.

Twalli · Answer

Possibly telling their friends so they know he's ready to date. My girlfriend almost turned me down because she knew her friend liked me (actually two of them). One said to her "If you don't want him, can I have him?". So she may have turned you down because she isn't besotted with you and her friend (s) are. If one of her friends asks you out and you like her, you'll be lucky she told her friends.

abhi44444 · Answer

It to ask about opinion or tell them a new goat has come also I have questions why do Hollywood actor have so many good actor whose acting so naturally how do they become actor in move in our India there are less whose movie fail many time but they famously

Brandi555 · Answer

Because we tell each other stuff. I’d never do it to embarrass the guy. When I tell a friend that stuff it’s because I’m sharing a negative experience. I feel bad rejecting. But it’s less hurtful then pretending to like him.

Anonymous · Answer

It gives the other girls an amusing story to enjoy.

It lets others know that they're attracting dudes.

It lets others know the kinds of guys they ACTUALLY like (as well as what they DON'T like) so those girls could introduce them to guys they desire.

It warns the other girls that this dude is on the prowl and may come for them.

That seems like a good set of reasons.

melanieeeB · Answer

Conversation lol "Oh you know what happened today..." (a normal conversation and just telling about your day, like an adult and not to make fun of someone else of course!)

jshm2 · Answer

The same reason guys do to girls.  It's important for the group to not include people who have a previous negative encounter with the group.

Kayla45 · Answer

It's just typical gossip, sometimes it's not a bad thing. Some girls laugh about it afterwards, but I don't know if my friends ever mocked a guy for trying, that's for sure.

cth96190 · Answer

Because it elevates their status among the female collective. Also, women by nature dislike men and seldom miss an opportunity to put the boot in.

slatyb · Answer

The guy needs to get over that. Also he should start dating adults instead of overage high-school girls.

Anonymous · Answer

Let's face it. Today's women 30 and below are looking for guys that fit the rule of six. At least six feet tall, have at least 6 inches of equipment and make at least 6 figures in income. If you don't fit don't bother her!

daisydukeso · Answer

i just tell my friends everything that happens to me, my guy friends do the same honestly

likelyOK · Answer

It’s not always to be mean some women just share everything with their girlfriends

Sour-rose · Answer

I'm sure someone's said it but it's just how girls are. they gonna talk, one way or another.

RedStiletto88 · Answer

Maybe there is a reason why we rejected him that we want our friends to be aware of?

WhitneySnow · Answer

It’s something interesting that happened to them

Mangospacho · Answer

It’s like a credit score. When one bank calls the loan, all the other banks check up on your score

Anonymous · Answer

no... it's just conversation... girls tell their friends lots of things... this isn't any different.

TroyDT · Answer

Newsflash - a lot of girls will also share how good or bad you, how big or small, how adept you are, etc.

Juxtapose · Answer

It's the only way they can feel accomplished in their sorry lives. Can you imagine bragging about rejecting a woman? That's a bitch move.

Anonymous · Answer

Because they probably already share a negative opinion about you... Not saying it's deserved, but that probably what's up.

Anonymous · Answer

It’s gossip to them, so something to talk about and someone to put down in front of someone to make themselves feel good

Jamie05rhs · Answer

I know, right? That's fucked up. We don't do that to them.

Anonymous · Answer

Most Girls are assholes and love that they het the attention even if they don’t want the guys.

Anonymous · Answer

So they can share a laugh and say, "As if!!!". Girls are evil.

Anonymous · Answer

Because men are second class citizens look at those citizens in times past

Anonymous · Answer

Because they are feminits and feminists hates normal men

Smoke-n-Growls · Answer

Why do you assume it's to embarrass you?

Aphrodite801 · Answer

We can do what we want.

Ezra_lila · Answer

To lift herself😎 Not my thing though.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Because they have no life.

boobliker · Answer

to let them know they feel wanted!

Avadarling · Answer

I no do this so

Pinay_ako · Answer

To show off.. 😑

EaterPeter · Answer

They probably think of it as a body count 🙂

Rangers · Answer

They like belittling people

LimitedBenefits101 · Answer

Women love to gossip.

Heolurt · Answer

It's just female nature.

WhiteBoyChill · Answer

Because they’re shallow people

Anonymous · Answer

Its an ego boost for some girls.

erin_ireland · Answer

Gossips

The_Shadow_Dweller · Answer

So true bro.

Lilboy99 · Answer

To know what her friend would do if it was her

bubblegunnn · Answer

To vent 😂

ZenJen444 · Answer

Just as conversation

Why do some girls tell their friends when a guy asks them out and they reject him?

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