How should I tell my girlfriend that it's inappropriate for her to not wear a bra in public?

[rolangaros]

We've been dating for 1 month and that's why I don't want to hurt or scare her. But I don't like my girlfriend without bra in public. How can I warn her?

[hector]

Approaching the topic of personal choices, especially ones related to someone's attire, requires sensitivity, understanding, and empathy. If you feel the need to discuss your girlfriend's choice to not wear a bra in public, consider the following steps:

Find a quiet, private setting where you both feel relaxed and free from distractions. This will set a conducive environment for a sensitive conversation.

Begin by expressing that you're sharing your feelings and not making a demand. Use "I" statements to avoid sounding accusatory. For instance, "I feel a bit uncomfortable when you don't wear a bra in public" rather than "You shouldn't go out without wearing a bra."

Instead of just stating your feelings, try to understand hers. Ask her how she feels about it and why she makes this choice. Before jumping to conclusions, genuinely listen to her reasons. She might have comfort or personal reasons behind her choice.

Remember that societal norms regarding bras have been evolving. Many women now choose not to wear bras for various reasons, including comfort, body positivity, or rejecting societal expectations.

Understand that, ultimately, it's her body and her choice. Your feelings are valid, but so are hers. It's crucial to respect her autonomy over her body and clothing choices.

If both of you have strong feelings about the topic, see if there's a middle ground you can find that respects both perspectives. Remember, open and respectful communication is the key. Avoid sounding judgmental or trying to control her choices. Instead, share your feelings and understand hers, fostering mutual respect in the relationship.

[ShadowYamihiro]

Simply tell her you don't want your girlfriend to go around without a bra, its annoying and disrespectful to you, its not like you are asking her for much, in fact she herself should have asked you for your opinion. I had a girl like that. she loved the attention of other guys and since i found it disturbing and hurtful to go out like that on purpose while she is dating me i told her that i want her to stop, she realized she was hurting me in a way with that and even apologized. sure it could have ended up in us breaking up but that is still better then letting your woman go out like that with pure purpose of drawing attention. its disrespectful to you and you need to tell her that. If she can't be loyal to you and do something so simple and you should find someone who will treat you as you deserve and behave properly. this is immature attention seeking behaviour and you deserve better. If she refuses and can't do such a tiny thing for you then i doubt your relationship would be any better in the future. Rather look for someone who will understand that she is with a man now and need to act accordingly.

[Anonymous]

You need to first understand, that in this culture, there is no such thing as a girlfriend...

All you have today is 'and what you think doesn't matter either lol, you can get naked if you want idgaf lmao.'

Men need to learn to stop trying to make non girlfriend material their girlfriend...

The amount of women that have boyfriend... who are completely single as soon as they cross the threshold of the work office...

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

I don’t like wearing a bra and I almost never do. That’s the way I lived since I was 17.

What’s the exact reason you don’t like it?

My ex fiancé didn’t have a problem me walking braless. He encouraged me to wear what I wanted.

I really liked that.

More than everything I loved that he trusted me and this trust of his made me feel even higher responsibility to never hurt him and to always show him my love and loyalty.

Even though I never wore a bra, I told every approaching man that I have a boyfriend who I love and I have zero interest any other men but him.

We were long distance for 2 years. Everytime I was approached at birthday parties, I’d open my phone, show them my wallpaper of my boyfriend and told them I already have an amazing man, so they’d rather find someone else to flirt with.

Then I would call my then boyfriend and tell him I loved him.

So, me not wearing a bra didn’t make me any more likely to cheat than I would be if I wore a bra. I would never cheat regardless. As of other men, who cares what they think?

If I am yours, then I am yours whether I like wearing bras or not.

And other men cannot touch me or have me.

[KrakenAttackin]

@lafemmefatale_1. You are not particularly well endowed, maybe his girlfriend has huge knockers?

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

@KrakenAttackin He never stated that. What’s the difference between being well endowed and not being well endowed?

[KrakenAttackin]

Use your imagination.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

@KrakenAttackin Breast is breast. Nipple is nipple. I wonder, from a man’s perspective, why would a man have no problem with his girlfriend not wearing a bra if she didn’t have big breast and why would he have a problem if he had bigger breast?

[KrakenAttackin]

Because big boobs bounce around and draw every mans eye. Small boobs do not. You know this but pretend not to.

She probably likes the attention she gets from rando's (unless they are unattractive).

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

@KrakenAttackin I disagree with that, my cousin has 36D cups, I don’t-
she’s very pretty,

none of us wear a bra when we are partying and we get equal attention from men.

Actually the last time we went out in Georgia on a birthday party, I was 25, ai wasn’t wearing anything revealing.

There were about 100 people, half of them being guys, and majority of them either asked my number, asked me for a dance, asked me out, or gave me flowers and etc.

The next day, intrigued guys asked my cousin, whose birthday party it was, she was sending me screenshots of guys asking her to give them my contact, or ask about who I was?

“Who was that girl? She was the sexiest.”

They were left wondering because of course I didn’t give my number to anyone and told them, I was in love, engaged and not interested.

Couple of them were young millionaires, owners of my cousin’s company and they thought just because every girl fancies them, they’d get any chance with me. I enjoyed proving them wrong.

That’s one of the examples that big breast doesn’t necessarily mean male biggest attention.

With both of us present, the girl with small breast got more attention.

[KrakenAttackin]

"Out partying"... ugh... whatever. Well, she doesn't wear a bra to amp up the jiggle facto and draw men in. Some guys like big udders, others not so much. The point is the no bra thing was her effort to draw in more guys who want sex.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

@KrakenAttackin Out partying at the birthday of my own cousin. What’s wrong with it? My ex knew and he helped me pick outfit.

[TipsyFr]

@KrakenAttackin I don’t think that’s the point so many women where I’m from don’t wear bra’s it doesn’t help stop the sag as much as the industry would make people believe. Also over here men aren’t as savage thinking everything women do is to draw guys in for sex.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

@TipsyFr I agree, I think bras don’t help stop the sag, actually maybe they help them sag even more.

As for me, I have worn bra on very rare occasions since 17 and I can say, not wearing a bra hasn’t caused me any sagging.

I think skin has natural elasticity to support itself and bra makes skin less likely to maintain it’s own elasticity.

[provokeesmokee]

Lmao, what the fuck kind of approach are you considering taking that hurting her or making her feel unsafe are your main concerns? Bro?

You can ask her why, tell her you feel uncomfortable with it (and explain in clear terms EXACTLY why it makes you uncomfortable - if you can't answer why, abandon this question now), and politely request she considers wearing bras outside.

But it's her body, her clothes, her choice.

Again, wtf are you planning to do to her when asking about her bra has you concerned about harming her and her safety? Like, calm down?

[Mamaliv]

Is she flat chested? Maybe find out why she chooses not to wear a bra? I could never go with out, but I am busty. If my tits were small and perky I’d love to go with out, but I’d just look like washed up trailer trash if I didn’t wear a bra in public 😂 doesn’t she not have a good quality bra? I have no problem spending good money on bras that are comfortable and make me feel sexy, maybe she’s never had a good quality bra?

[Frank62]

I liked your reply !

[LunarEclipse433]

Great answer!!

[Mac-One]

@mamaliv It should be a matter whether she needs the bray for support. If her breasts do not require the bra bra for support than it would not be necessary. Tiny perky breasts definitely would not need the support and she would probably be comfortable and attractive without it. If she is flat chested she would not have any need for a bra and would possibly even be able to go topless without attracting undue attention where guys are able to go topless.

[Mamaliv]

Well boobies come in all shapes and sizes, some woman can get away with out a bra and look good, some can not.. so I guess by asking if she is flat chested I mean, is it obvious in the wrong ways that she isn’t wearing a bra? Is she doing it in a way that everyone will be noticing that she clearly does not have a bra on or is she pulling it off subtly?

[Pacquet]

I mean if she’s going braless to something like the office party I’d say something otherwise, who cares? A month, my guy? You’re venturing into controlling territory, you can share how you feel about it but don’t expect a 180. There’s probably more reasons than you know to why she’s not wearing a bra sometimes. Maybe ask her why or find a girl that doesn’t mind rocking a bra all day.

[Guido]

It would be a serious mistake to say something. She may be totally comfortable without a bra.

Women do not take kindly to men telling them how they should dress. That is a relationship killer.

You need to accept that this is who she is and how she dresses. Otherwise this will drive you crazy and any chance of a relationship is gone.

[AaronKrieger]

Nah, she already started doing it before you were together. You don't ask for changes a month in for something you would've already recognized weeks prior.

[Monalisa77]

I usually wear one as my chest gets cold easily but its far too hot atm to wear 1

[Apple1996]

Whats inappropriate about not wearing a bra? And it's her choice to choose how she dresses. It'd be controlling to tell her what to wear

[artgorgeous]

Ask her whether there is anything she doesn't like about you. She will most likely ask you to share opinion of yours about her. And then tell her this.

[katiesmuff]

Maybe ask her why she goes braless! I am one who goes braless because I hated the straps and tightness of the harness and it's a good feeling with my tits hanging free.

[integrale77]

It's her choice your going to have to live with it and it's by no means inappropriate!

It is however inappropriate to make judgements like this on what she wears!

[Anonymous]

i don't care if you don't like it. never tell a woman what to wear or not to wear. mind your business.

[AviatorTom]

You might want to pick a different thing to comment on. A woman wears a bra, or doesn't wear one, because that's her choice. This is a battle you're probably going to lose.

[abdillahisoofee]

@AviatorTom

[slatyb]

You shouldn't. It's perfectly appropriate, and entirely her choice.

[strateguy632]

not so obvious because she might be doing it on lurpose for attention, see shadow yami here. so this depends.

[slatyb]

@strateguy632 It's still entirely her choice. If you don't like it then don't date her.

[HelpfulWoman]

"warn her" lmao.
you can voice how you feel about it, but apart from that, it's not up to you.

[Frank62]

Maybe your girlfriend likes that free feeling of not wearing a bra in public. This is still the land of free isn’t it? Perhaps making no big deal out of it would be better.

[Likes2drive]

I would be glad if I had a girlfriend that didn’t wear one but you can’t really tell her that because it’s up to her on how she feels about it, also it’s too early in the relationship to ask her to do things like that, she would not like that

[RedInnocent68]

Umm, you shouldn’t. She can wear whatever she wants. Warn her? Is your concern for her breasts or your insecurity? Don’t you ever feel like not wearing underwear sometimes?

[kellytheman]

Maybe just tell her how you feel when she not wearing a bra in public. My girl is the same way but she know certain places where its okay and not okay to wear a bra.

[strateguy632]

if she wears a shirt fine without bra. not inappropriate

[Anonymous]

My boyftiend would rather have me without bra and nipple covers on, but I don't like my nipples to show so I do wear nipple covers. I don't like bras and I don't need to wear them given my A cups

[jmsinaz]

A relationship is full of moves and counter-moves. She goes braless, you go comando; that is if what you have between your legs is large enough to clearly show the world that you're not wearing any undergarment.

[Wise4myage]

Seriously? Don't say anything for the time being. You are not her father.