Girls, Do you hide your worst times from your new boyfriend?

[RoseySarah]

Yes

Yes for a few months

Nope don't hide it

Won't hide it but maybe play it down some

[Anonymous]

I'll never allow myself to be vulnerable again with anyone.

It took me a year to open up about myself in my last relationship. He weaponized all of my vulnerabilities against me.

I was mentally healthier and happy with him, only to be totally destroyed by him.

I feel a fool and naive for not seeing any red flags early on.

[RoseySarah]

Huge hug so sorry what res flags did you miss?
My ex was like that 😅. Just likes him ignoring the bad red flags

[Opinion Owner]

Thank you ❤️ there were some subtle signs early on. There were times I had a gut feeling he was lying and manipulating me. But I chose to overlook my gut. He could be quite passive aggressive too.

[DizzyDesii]

I like to think of it as having matured so i’ll throw my little tantrums in private 🤣 Maybe call him a couple of names in the mirror.

[RoseySarah]

Maybe hiding in bed hoping he pushes chocolates under the door.

My reversable angry on my night stand. 😂 hint hint to him.

[DevikaButts95]

In what regard? I don't really actively bring up my worst times but I wouldn't say it's hidden.

[RoseySarah]

Our red week

[DevikaButts95]

Ohhhhhh no I don't hide that.

[Ms_Facesitter]

I don't hide it, I want him to know I trust him completely and I expect him to do the same.

[RoseySarah]

Good point! Being open is important in a relationship.

[Radiate143]

And this is how you get played

[RoseySarah]

@Radiate143 lease explain?

[Radiate143]

Women make the mistake of talking too much too soon. Men are not your girlfriends. (And even girlfriends are mostly snakes in the grass anyway.) When you start talking your business about why your last relationship failed, your family problems and other sensitive info he is a) judging you b) determining your value c) calculating how much bad behaviour he can get away with and d) storing the info as a weapon later.

You want to build an emotional connection but you are just handing him the gun to shoot you with.

[Radiate143]

Men are hunters by nature. They are competitive, selfish and egotistical by nature. The good ones work against their baser selves and have empathy and respect. But they are so far and few between. Women think because a man is attracted to them and is being nice that he can be trusted. no!

[Ms_Facesitter]

@Radiate143 Why would you talk about your past relationships? I don't think anyone wants to hear that. We have to move forward. He knows about the family matters, he's on my side. Pick a bad partner, and he'll use it as a weapon. Pick a good one and he'll support you, just like you're supposed to support him.

[Radiate143]

It was an example. I meant sensitive information. If what you got is working kudos.

[Ms_Facesitter]

@Radiate143 Oh my bad. But yes from what I've seen from him, he's a good man.

[Radiate143]

Well that's great then! 😊

[RoseySarah]

@Radiate143 men need time to be open and listen well have to teach most guys that

[Radiate143]

They know about it. They just do what they want. If they don't want a connection with you they won't open up. Period. No teaching can change that.

[Smashingdoozy]

Never have. Never will. If you can't deal with me during the worst times you shouldn't stick around

[RoseySarah]

And many don't!

[rosemilk]

i have never hid any of my worst times from my partner.

[RoseySarah]

Good be proud of them and they will help you through

[rosemilk]

absolutely

[petitedollbabee]

Nope. If we’re going to be together long term, then he’s got to know what he’s getting into.

[RoseySarah]

Very well put! He needs to know how things are going to be!

[Mimi_ox]

Umm no. Unless I want it to be a fake relationship. I want him to see me in my worst times and my best times so he knows me for who I really am

[RoseySarah]

What about if he wants you to sleep over for the first time that bad time? Just going to bring a towel?

[Mimi_ox]

Umm maybe I answered the question in a different light

[Jamie465]

My boyfriend I had when I was 16 cheated me and another one did and now 1 of them is in a mental hospital and I visit him from time to time he is not doing well

[RoseySarah]

That is sweet but what is happening to him? Mental break down or just mental disease?

[Jamie465]

Scytsaphy and break downs

[Jamie465]

And his mom dad and little sister died

[LexiHunnyP93]

@roseysarah yes I have and it turned out to be a mistake

[RoseySarah]

So sorry what made it a mistake if your open to share?

[LexiHunnyP93]

@roseysarah well he didn't take it well :)

[RoseySarah]

So sorry guys can be so cruel! Probably just cause he could not have you every day he wanted.

That happened to my sister!

[Radiate143]

Yes. NEVER get very vulnerable in the beginning. You will be judged. Men just do this.

[RoseySarah]

Lol well we do it also.

[Radiate143]

The difference is thatbwomen will nurture a man a man will just look at you as source of benefit for a particular need. Exhaust you then move on if you are an open book.

[Adaeva]

He doesn't need to know.