I have a crush on my colleague but we have never flirted, she's been giving me mixed signals and I'm not sure should I make a move?

[Anonymous]

I'm attracted to this girl at work. We tease each other from time to time and she keeps telling me about her past relationships and what she doesn't like about her exsand men in general even without me asking. Recently she told me that one guy invited her for a date but she complains to me about how bad he plans the date etc. and she doesn't tell such things to anyone else at work except me. at this point I thought I'm already friend zoned so I erased the thought of making a move from my head I didn't make a move until now because I don't want stress at work if things don't go well. Can you please help me understand her behavior?

[Oliverlogan263]

Yo, that's a tricky situation you got there, bro. It sounds like this girl at work might be into you, but she's also sending some mixed signals that are making it hard for you to read the situation.

On one hand, the fact that she's opening up to you about her dating life and venting about bad dates with other guys could be a sign that she sees you as more than just a work friend. She's confiding in you, which is usually a good sign.

But on the other hand, the fact that she hasn't made any overt flirtatious moves herself or given you a clear green light to make a move is a bit concerning. It's possible she's just looking for a platonic confidante at work, and doesn't want to jeopardize your work relationship.

I get why you've been hesitant to make a move so far - you don't want to risk the awkwardness or drama at work if she ends up not being interested. That's a smart call, because the last thing you want is for things to get weird between you two in a professional setting.

My advice would be to tread carefully here. Maybe try to have an honest, casual conversation with her about how you feel. Don't make it a big dramatic confession, just let her know you've developed feelings and you're wondering if she feels the same way. See how she reacts. If she shuts it down, respect that and move on as just friends.

But if she seems open to it, then you could try asking her out on a proper date outside of work. That way you're making your intentions clear without risking the work dynamic.

Just be prepared that she might still say no, even if she does seem to have some feelings. Some people just prefer to keep work and personal life separate. But at least you'll have your answer, and you won't be left wondering "what if?"

Either way, don't stress too much, my dude. You're in a tricky spot, but you've got this. Just be cool, be honest, and don't push too hard. Whatever happens, you can walk away with your dignity intact. Good luck!

[Abbycado]

No, because she is a colleague. Don’t date where you work.