I'm confused by a girls mixed signal?

[Ggtth]

So, for context: I've been stonewalling (for reasons) and I find myself in a city I've learnt to like and be ok with. I am getting better and I think I want to move.

This girl visits my workplace for a few days, and when I first saw her I got excited. She looked beautiful. But, I stonewalled for the first two days. Then I made an effort to speak to her, and it turns how we connected quite quickly and had things in common. It was quite quick how we connected which tells me its a good thing.

We spend time together, and over that time she shows very obvious signs of interest. But, she has a boyfriend. She has a boyfriend and I caught wind he wasn't showing up enough in the relationship. Still, I keep my guard down and get to know her more while being respectful of her relationship.

She shared personal details about herself, took interest in who I am, did silly things with me, flirted sexually, and imitated/mirrored me. She did other things too.

Then when the last day comes and I wonder/hope we exchange contact info, she spends the day mirroring me and catching my eye and then simply says goodbye. I tried to avoid saying goodbye directly, but she makes a point of saying ''My name'? goodbye.'

Now a month or more later I'm still agonising over it. It was so clear but she drops contact completely. What I want to do is change my life for the better in hopes of seeing her again. But I wonder, what was her intention here?

An important bit of information: her dad died when she was 16, and I was stonewalling because my dad died recently. She saw that in me.

So, what does this all mean? Was she just helping me out of a rut? Or does she intend to come back into my life?

It was a huge mixed signal in that she showed strong interest, and then pulled away completely.

Updates

8 mo

I am changing my life*

Updates

8 mo

I feel like a marked man

[StarWarGirl]

There isn't anything like mixed signals. It's quite normal that we can find someone else attractive or we could feel like intrested to them. But still we CHOOSE to choose the person we want to be with.

By your text I feel like she was interested in you and she might be liking you also she liked the time she spent with you, but still she chose to not stay with you.

It's a "Goodbye" from her, what she specifically mentioned to you.

Accept it and move on in your life.

[Ggtth]

I guess. I just don't know why she spent all that time attracting me, and doing it towards the end of the day before she said goodbye too.

I think I just want to believe something could have happened. You know when you meet someone who says all the things you think?

[StarWarGirl]

She was simply doing the things she felt to do, being honest with herself. If that attracted you that's not her fault it was all natural and normal it happens.

Yes I know that feeling. I have been through such phase with a boy I never had plan to have a relationship with. We both were similarly flirty and all and able to understand eachother so well. Also we were attracted to each other but he knew I'm not going to choose him because of some reason.

[Ggtth]

To me it felt contrived. Like she made an effort to do the things she did, not just feeling it. We weren't talking about personal things, she told me and showed me pictures just randomly.

[StarWarGirl]

Ohky let's say she did. But still what's the reason for you to go for her? Did she asked you for doing so in clear words? Did she said anything in clear words? Is it right for you to go behind her when she has a boyfriend? Do you feel this morally right? And why she said "goodbye" in the end if she wanted you?

[Ggtth]

I'm not saying I want to do that. I'm not going to pursue because that is morally not ok. I'm wondering why she did what she did.

Thank you for helping me.

[Nikki1989]

Where is the mixed signal?

You are overthinking this far too much.

[Ggtth]

I don't understand?