What makes the bad-boy, jerk, exciting, fun to be around, and what makes the nice-guy boring? why? how come?

[Anonymous]

We all know that this topic will never end, this topic, discussion, has been beaten to death many times, guys complain all the time wondering why the "nice-guy" always gets rejected by girls and why girls always prefer the bad-boy, jerks. They always say it is because the bad-boy, jerk, a**hole of a guy, is exciting, fun for the girl, meanwhile the nice-guy is boring. But they never explain specifically what makes the bad-boy, jerk exciting, and the nice-guy boring. So please explain very specifically, give me actual examples of what makes the nice-guy boring and the bad-boy, jerk, exciting, fun.

Updates

+1 y

What I don't like, what pisses me off too is that a nice-guy can be assertive, actually have the balls(I hate that word, phrase) to make a move on a girl, make the moves and initiate, ask her out, go after what he wants which is what girls want, but still always constantly get rejected, because they say the nice-guy is shy, passive, does not make a move, but I'm not afraid to make a move but I still always get rejected, it is very frustrating, kinda makes me feel like I can beat up a bad-boy.

Updates

+1 y

Because they label, say nice-guys are passive, not assertive, or just not enough, do not initiate anything, but that's not my problem, I initied but get rejected all the time, have not gotten a Yes from a girl yet. Also, why do girls feel the need to be dependent on guys for excitement and fun in their lives? and why are girls easily able to get away with that? girls can be boring and still easily get a guy, but if a guy is boring he will stand no chance at all with a girl, not fair at all.

[noobseaplenty]

Here are some examples

* A nice guy will ask or make sure a girl is single and if she says she has a boyfriend he will restrict his emotions even if he still wants to f*** her. A bad boy is not going to care if a woman says she is married, he will do his best to have his urges satisfied and leave it up to the relationship between the girl and her borefriend/husband to see if he gets it.

*If a nice guy wants to express something they will consider how everyone will react to them and think about it being appropriate or not and if it will offend anybody. A bad boy will say whatever he feels and let the world have their reaction to him

*A nice guy will be too empathetic towards women, he will put himself too much in their shoes and forgoe his own urges to accommodate a woman, a bad boy will go for what he wants

* A nice guy will treat a woman like a divine goddess who is doing them a huge favor by spending time with them and will shower the woman with gifts and pay for her. A bad boy only sees a naughty little girl that needs a spanking, he looks past all the bullsh*t and makeup and knows that every woman was once a little bratty girl and one day will be an old woman. he sees himself as the prize and holds the attitude that being with them is the best possible thing the woman can do

*A nice guy will start planning a wedding the first moment any decently looking woman shows any kind of attention to them. A bad boy, and this is important, lets the woman have fantasies about him and doesn't put any weight into a relationship until he f***ed her.

[Asker]

how about what makes the bad-boy, jerk, fun, exciting? specifically what are the examples as to what makes that guy fun, exciting? I think girls have a different definition of fun, exciting than guys do

[noobseaplenty]

I just told you, a girl isn't going to get excited if a guy is all nice and asks her if she has a boyfriend and then backs off if she says she does, she is going to get excited by a guy that does not give a f***, "if you want me take me or leave me, but I'm not going to castrate myself and my desires" that is exciting

[Asker]

well, what's wrong with backing off if she has a boyfriend? I would not want to waste my time with a girl who is taken

[noobseaplenty]

your whole attitude is wrong, it's about being truthful to what YOU want, most girls are in a relationship for the hell of it, then some who say they have a boyfriend are blatantly lying to you, anyway, your attitude needs to chance, you need to go for what YOU want, I mean, that's all I can tell you without going into a 10 page lesson (people should pay me to do that)

[Asker]

and why are girls attracted to guys that go after what they want?

[noobseaplenty]

your worried about the WHY, I let scientists figure that out (and they don't get laid much). All I care is the WHAT, what works, there is a ton of theories out there from evolution to programed to aliens about the why, right now you are talking about the difference between playing a sport and figuring out the mechanics of the muscles while your playing. Knowing the mechanics is fine but it won't help you get better unless you start playing

[Asker]

lol okay, I won't worry about that then, so, I don't want to make excuses anymore, so when a girl says she has a boyfriend, often times should be be "testing" the guy right?

[noobseaplenty]

yes, even more often they will be in a relationship they don't really want to be in just for the sake of not being single, look at it this way, if she is really in a loving relationship and her boyfriend is doing everything right, then no matter what YOU do she isn't going to leave him, so YOU should do your best to attract her regardless, does that make sense?

[Asker]

oh OK, yeah, makes sense now

[moviedude714]

i think it is because the Bad-Boy is more Extroverted, more social, has a lot of friends, both guys and girls

[Reeseluv]

I don't feel that way at all. Maybe just find different women. Women who believe this are emotionally unstable and this attitude will only come back to bite them in the butt. And as for being rejected, well take it as a good sign you just missed a girl who could have caused you tons of drama in life. The right one will come. Maybe try different places where these types of girls will be.

:) Good Day

[Anonymous]

This isn't true for all women, I hate bad boys and always look for the nice caring good guys :) unfortunately I always seem to attract the guys who seem nice then they aren't lol :) I find nice guys sexier as you know they aren't going to cheat on you :)

[Asker]

you girls say that all the time

[think_of_the_bubble]

I'm not attracted to bad boys but I think it's the idea that you have to "chase" him to keep him interested and you are never sure where you stand with him.

Also I think it may make you respect him more.

[Anonymous]

The nice guy is often too predictable and a push over. Yeah, nice guys can be assertive, but most of the time they'll let you walk all over them. You can predict their next move so easily.

[awkwardantics]

Can you give examples? This would be more helpful to us!

[TheDigitalSaint]

The problem is with nice guy/bad boy comparisons is that you can't expect all men to fall in one box or another. There just aren't two boxes to check as to what kind of man you are, or what women like.

Simply put, many bad boys have confidence or pick out girls that are insecure and exploit those insecurities. These girls often know what they are doing too, so it isn't like they don't like part of the rush of a wild man. They exploit each other, it isn't just the "bad boy" picking on the poor innocent girl.

For "nice guys", I believe a number of them are reasonably good people as advertised. Their problem is, that as a group, they honestly care too much about what women think about them. Women hate men who seek the approval. It kills their attraction triggers and sends these guys into the friend-zone.

For a subset of "nice guys" they honestly don't have some very "nice" opinions of girls (taking it out on some girls because a nasty one spited them a long time ago) or are too lazy to actually keep trying. Men need to experience a lot of rejection before they find a girl. If you stop and quit the game early, your results will reflect that.

Of course, there are exceptions to every rule, but the number one reason why bad boys get with girls is that THEY SIMPLY DON'T CARE ABOUT WHAT THE GIRL THINKS ABOUT THEM.

There's nothing more powerful in attracting women than a man who doesn't give a damn. The player types master this. Even nice guys can too. As soon as you don't care any longer about what a girl may or may not think about you, you build attraction in her for you. She needs to know what if she says "no" to you, you really don't care that much because you're already on your way to asking out another girl. This is the fundamental difference between any man who is good with girls (nice or not) and one who isn't.

[Asker]

what makes the guy too predictable as to what makes him a nice-guy? what are examples?

[TheDigitalSaint]

Being too predictable means always eating at the same place, always wearing the same clothing, only reading a narrow range of books, just playing videogames, always calling girls back right away like you have nothing better to do, always agreeing with a girl even when she's wrong or you have a different viewpoint, etc.

Any time you seem to doing any of the above behaviors, girls loose interest, because there's nothing new to discover about you after a few short dates. Keep learning and improve.

[Asker]

how often should you call or text a girl when you are still in the talking, getting to know each other stages, have only had one date, do you believe in the 3-day rule?

[TheDigitalSaint]

No, I don't believe in the three day rule. Call her back the following evening and if she doesn't pick up, just leave a voice mail, re-record it if you need to before you submit it. Don't get carried away with same-night texts or calls just after the date, but the following evening, call and leave a message saying "hey its me, call me back". Don't make it long, just have her call you back. When she does, then you set up date number two. That's building mystery.

[Asker]

yeah because I obviously don't want to call or text too much, I want to show the girl I'm busy, that I have a life, have things to do, don't want to be desperate or needy, clingy, but at the same time I don't want to go too long without calling or texting her because she could lose interest

[TheDigitalSaint]

Just follow the next night rule. Girls know just about all guys are doing the 3 day rule and it is okay to break with convention if you know the girl is interested and you're interested back. That's why you don't put too much info in the voice mail, you make her want you to call her back and find out more. You can go overboard with being too hard to get, or being to available. My method strikes a nice balance.

[Asker]

doing the balance part is hard though, so if not 3-days, then how about every other day? like no more than 2 days?

[TheDigitalSaint]

That's fine.

[noobseaplenty]

Men and women want different things in life, most men will happily go after a girl simply because she looks good or smells nice, women are after the emotional high also but one that is only partially supplied by looks. Just because women can get a guy does not mean they can get a guy that makes them feel good.

Im telling you now that you can go and have some really ugly woman, GO they would LOVE to be with you, but you won't because they don't make you FEEL GOOD, which is the same thing women feel with guys that can't turn them on

[Asker]

yeah, it's easier to attract people with your looks than it is with your body-language, behavior, talks

[noobseaplenty]

Ha, tell that to women that are born ugly! At least guys can improve their behavior, some women are stuck with what god gave them. I'd rather have a harder life with opportunity to improve on my own steam than leave myself completely up to fate

[Asker]

ugly women get dates, boyfriends too

[Danielstairclimber]

when you said " just because women can get a guy does not mean that guy makes them feel good" are you referring to the bad guys or the nice guys?

[shumailkazimi]

what I have observed is girls usually like bad boys but its only more of sexual they have mostly settled down marriage mind you with gud guys

[IHateBeingaMan]

girls generally always seem to want a guy that is a challenge