I'm doing nothing but she's acting weird

[Anonymous]

Hi guys!

Anyway some time ago I meat this really nice girl that I really started to like and we really hit it off and everything was going great but then in one moment it all went south for no parent reason. She just said she wasn't interested and there was never any interest on her part anyway. Witch I didn't buy for a second because I had a feeling that she got cold feet and backed off.

Anyway I can't say I wasn't hurt but I didn't show it and acted all normal toward her but for some reason she kept ignoring me one day but a little less the next. So a few days ago we sort meat each other by accident and talked and even laughed a little. I even thought she looked like she missed my company a little.

The next day she was a little more but still at least not ignoring me and speaking to me a little.

But yesterday I get an I'm from her asking me 3 times if I was there and then finally she just wrote me that she couldn't see me for a while because it doesn't feel right or something along these lines. The thing is we hang out in the same crowd but I can't excuse from where we hang because my work is related.

Well here's what I don't get. She told me she wasn't interested and that here was nothing there and that she wasn't going to bother herself with me. Now if that all is really true then why all the wired mood swings and the blowing off stuff. Since I wasn't angry at her and I didn't act in any rude way toward her.

I mean if she really didn't care about the whole situation why is she writing me crazy texts that she doesn't want to see me when I've been keeping my distance.

I really, really like this girl but she's strange and I don't understand her.

[justaskin8888]

you may have been moving too quickly. if she's a quality girl, and there seems to be a hint of rush-rush lets gdtf now, she may like you; but feel a relationship would not be a good choice. I have really, really liked certain guys but they were moving fast, or they seemed to be trying to present themselves in a way that I didn't think was authentic. In her mind, its better to just disengage. It might seem like mixed signals, because the girl really does like you and doesn't really have an ax to grind. Sho she seems favorable to you--which she is. She just doesn't know your intentions fully, doesn't trust you, or feels the relationship will be bad for her. So she shuts it down. It makes sense when you think of all of the guys out there who are just looking for fwb, dtf girls, nsa, hit-it-n-quit-it, etc. She may have learned something about you that while you may think is innocent, totally shut the door for her. Women won't tell you, this sort of thing; they just disappear or change behavior and men think they go hot and cold. I've really liked a guy and during a convo w/him he mentioned something that he didn't think twice about, but for me, I was ready to head for the exits. I'd say let her be.

[Asker]

I admit now that I look back at it I might have been moving a little too fast for her but in my defense I really had to kick myself in the butt to move slow and I really was moving slow with her. I guess just not slow enough. And I don't know she might have learned something about me or something I said but her change always happened the next day not when she was with me. And I really like her I haven't meat someone like this in years and I tried explaining this to her but it didn't help.

[justaskin8888]

exactly. some women, like me will hear the news and think, "Oh my god I've gotta get out of here." but remain calm, serene, friendly and even fun "at that moment." But when you see them again, they are totally on another level. Generally, I'm thinking, "Wow, dude, guess I'll just scratch you off the list." But I'm not "mad" at the guy, and I am having a good time. I just make a mental note and pass on any future encounters.

[Asker]

Ok. So this would translate into losing trust in the guy you were interested in and him becoming a write off right? Let's say it's something along these lines. Is there any possibility of salvaging the situation in your case? And if there is what would be the best way for me to win back her trust?

[justaskin8888]

it depends on the girl, and what it was that she learned or thought she saw that turned her. a girl like that doesn't want to hurt your feelings. so she won't tell you what it is--also, she probably doesn't want you to try to win her back bcs she likely feels the issue cannot be fixed with actions. I think you should move on.

[Asker]

I was afraid of that and it was what I was thinking. But I can't seem to figure out what it might be.

I don't know but I can't just move on. I really like her and I've got a gut feeling that I shouldn't move on just yet. Thing is I don't exactly know why and what flipped her. I don't think it was anything I did but still. It's bugging me.

[petrea]

Thiiiis is a bit weird. There are a few reasons I could think of why she would act like that but they really just don't sound right. The only way to truly understand her motives is to Ask Her. You really should. Just tell her you think you have a right to know why she suddenly started acting all different towards you.

If she doesn't tell you after that (do this face to face), you should really just let her go.

[Asker]

I tried talking to here face to face but she kept lying to my face. I've got no idea why but I could see she wasn't sincere. Besides she even said she didn't want to talk about us.

Thing is I really like this girl I haven't meat any girl like this for years so even if I've got to go trough some problems I'd like to stick around.

[amcurious]

maybe she is in love with you and she does not want to admit it... maybe she feels you don't deserve to b loved..be patient and talk to her

[Asker]

Actually I really did get the feeling from her that she was interested. Both just the feeling I got from her and her actions showed interest. Either than her having some bad experiences in the past with guys I haven't done anything that would make her think that I wouldn't be good enough for her.

[MystiKaL]

She's weird! Women do blow hot and cold very easily and I think she is trying to crave more attention from you and get reactions from you, she also sounds very confused! Maybe she might like another guy? Who knows. But either way, I agree with the chaps here and move on. The last thing you want is her to be messing with your head if you get more deeper into a relationship.

[Asker]

Tell me about it. She's a Gemini I don't really believe in these stuff but who knows. In person she's always more or less fine or even great. But then the next day she texts or IMs with bad news. So I'm guessing the night thinking things makes her act this way. She even hinted that she tends to over think. She did mention another guy but I'm not sure if it was true. Besides why would she be hanging out with me if there was someone else.

[MystiKaL]

Guess what, I'm Gemini too and I do over think and over react on the odd occasion lol But I think this girl is way too complicated and I'm confident that she has no idea what she wants, if its you, this other guy etc. She loves attention and when she doesn't get it she craves it in odd ways.She likes reactions from you & this is where you have to draw the line. Personally I'd ignore her a lot more and when she asks what's up then you can tell her you find her complicated. Don't let her run your life.

[Asker]

I won't let her run my life she's done that enough already. And I agree I think she doesn't like it when she hasn't got my attention. Especially since after she said she didn't want to see me after that I saw her and her friend watching me and commenting something when I was talking to a girl I know. That's a hell lot of attention from someone who is not interested. I don't know I'm not good at these games.

[MystiKaL]

Exactly, don't fall her silly little games. Once you get chatting to other girls, this particular one will end up fading in your head. Trust me I've been there done that. I've got one silly immature girl now trying to play mind games, I'm having none of it and will now just casually distance myself from her. I will not be treated like this by anyone, that's exactly how you should think with this very immature girl you are dealing with it. Trust me, bigger and better fish out there :)

[Asker]

You see there's what bugs me. I really like this one and I don't really care about better fish out there. But it's the mind games I don't like. And I've known from the beginning that I'm not going to give this one up for a long time. But I've also got no idea on how to handle the situation. Like you said it seems I have no choice but to leave the situation alone because it's out of my hands. It's a really big shame because we really connected and I really like her.

[MystiKaL]

I thought the same about my one. But she is up for mind games and stupid behavior so as much as it hurts now, I will get over it. If this girl you mention is any decent she would never screw with your head like this. The fact that she cannot appreciate you (same with my one) means she ain't worth knowing. Best to move on and if she wants to be friends then do so, but don't be readily available or up for meeting up unless you are sure you wanna do it.Otherwise she may start her silly tricks again.

[Asker]

I agree. Stupid mind behavior and mind games not good. But the thing that still bugs me is that the behavior is really out of her character. Witch is really strange.

Like you said moving on but unfortunately I won't be able to forget her any time soon and if the chance arises I'll probably take it.

[MystiKaL]

Mine did the same but at the end of the day, that's some women for you. It's not even the mood swings, its the severe hot and cold I cannot handle. Good luck but all I can say that unless she can change her ways, you will be stuck in this little cycle of hurt, which is what she wants.

[yopyopyop]

Don't try to understand her, just see how she acts.

And obviously she's doing one step forward, two steps back.

You'd better just forget her and move on.

[Asker]

That's my thought exactly. One forward and two back it's been that way since the beginning. May be my fault I might have moved things along to fast but I thought I was going with her pace. But the next day same story two steps back. But I really like her and want to stick around because I think she might be really the right one.

[yopyopyop]

The right one can't be a player.

[Asker]

I don't think she is. I think she just has some really big problems with trusting guys. That's the impression I got from her and even some of my friends said that they had this impression of her.

[Radford]

She doesn't know what the heck she wants dude roll out.Seek the lord he will provide that girl for u