Am I an overbearing girlfriend?

the one thing I've been terrified of since my boyfriend and I started dating is me being the overbearing girlfriend. The kind that makes he and his friends say "omg she keeps you on a tight leash" or "My God your girlfriend is too needy". I have never said no to him when he goes to hang out with his friends, I wait the majority of the time for him to ask me to hang out, hell I've even let him hang out with a friend of his that I knew was still in love with him (after I warned him about her). Even in this past week he knows all my friends are busy or at school and I'm all alone in my house and I said it was fine for him to hang out with his friends three days in a row. Ik he won't see them in a while so I didn't bitch that I was so alone and he promised to hangout with me a lot next week.

Even after this, why do I feel like his friends are still giving him sh*t behind my back. I've met them and my boyfriend says they love me but I'm still concerned. How do I deal with this? How do I know when I'm being overbearing?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Girl you gotta stop being paranoid! I know we see it in movies and TV a lot, guys will talk amongst themselves about how they "disapprove" of a dude's girlfriend because she won't let him go to a strip club or something haha, but that doesn't mean your boyfriend and his friends are like that! I've personally noticed that, in reality, many guys don't judge their friends' girlfriends, they just don't care that much about it.

    It also depends on whether or not your boyfriend is respectful of you or not. Say you make plans with him, and his friends want him to bail to hang out with them. Is he going to say, "Nah I have plans with my girlfriend" or "I can't, the old ball and chain wants me to hang out with her tonight'? :P You know how your boyfriend is, he's probably not a douchebag.

    Besides all that, it doesn't sound like you're being controlling anyway. Hold him to his promises, respect him when he makes the same promises to his friends, and all will be well.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Have you actually heard his friends to be saying it still? If not, then you're worrying about nothing. It's great that you're being thoughtful, he's lucky.


What Girls Said 1

  • I notice two things here

    1. You have no concrete evidence of anyone saying anything so - stress less

    2. There's a fine line between not wanting to be overbearing and holding back or suppressing yourself in a relationship. If you cross that line it becomes all you sacrificing for him and never him for you. You might be being a great girlfriend but you can't be truly happy like that

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