Do shy guys want an aggressive girl?

[Anonymous]

I have had a crush on this guy since January. A friend of mine who knows him really well has described how he is really shy and probably can't handle talking to a girl he likes but I've gotten to know him fairly well since the past few months over a series of hangouts/dates who knows? I like him a lot and we've hung out once a week since the beginning of July and he asks to hang out more than I ask him. He always tells my friend about when we hang out and of course she tells me and she asked him about his feelings towards me and she was pretty sure he told her that he was interested in me. I am also very into him but I don't want to pressure him because he's become very comfortable with me and he's rejected by most people in general because he does some socially awkward things. The whole time we've been hanging out on long, whole day excursions (and we've taken long drives to get to places that are further away, so we have spent a lot of time talking and figuring each other out). Only, there hasn't been a break in the physical contact barrier and I have been having a great time with him as what I think we have been (which is friends) and I felt weird about meeting some of his family one day because I wasn't sure what was happening. I just want to know if it's possible that he sees it the way I see it (that we are just hanging out as friends) or if he feels something more this whole time but is never going to pursue it at that level because he's shy and inexperienced (at 26). I guess I'm utterly confused about if he's waiting for me to be aggressive (but I'm also really shy and inexperienced) or if he's not interested because I'm not aggressive, and this is only because all of these shy guys on here talk about pursuing girls but being rejected. I've made it pretty clear that I won't turn down any advancements. Please don't take this personally, but are shy guys just always interested in the aggressive, outgoing girls who don't understand them?

[Middleman]

You're 3 months in the relationship, and there's still no sign of kissing or hand-holding? That's pretty surprising if you ask me...

Anyways if he's told another girl you're interesting, that is a clear sign he likes you. Unfortunately with some shy guys they feel they would rather go 'around' the issue than tell you direct...yes they can be that nervous! At least he has tried lol...as some people are so nervous they won't even tell somebody else about their secret crushes.

So what to do? I suggest that YOU should make a move next time round...like try holding his hands when you are out and see how he responds. Take initiative in the relationship (as it should be when dating, for the lady to decide how it should go). Hopefully you should find out right away what his feelings are on this. If he likes you, you're in!

[jmoo1710]

I believe it is not necessarily the aggressive girl part that he might like, the thing is that when a shy guy likes a girl, he likes and wants to make sure the girl she likes likes him back, if not, he will probably not make a move (because he is shy). So if you know he is shy, try to let him know you like him too, in a way that is pretty obvious to him, when he fill secure about you liking him, he will stop being as shy as he is, he will approach more, not entirely NOT SHY anymore, but more open to you.