24 y/o male virgin with depression question

[SinkIntoDarkness]

Hello everyone,

I want to know would women consider dating someone with depression that is turning things around. Or what think about dating someone with depression.

Im a 24 y/o male virgin now diagnosed with major depression. Currently I'm in the process of turning things around to better myself through therapy and have a better outlook on life. My depression was a result of me not having a love life, lack of social network, and early childhood trauma/bullying.



Im a nice guy who is goal oriented. Kind, caring, fatherly type personality. Cooks, cleans, exercises, has a good paying job, a new car, my own apartment and managing fairly well. Of course the only thing missing here is a woman in my life...

Thing is due to my early childhood trama I've never dated before (no first kiss, no sexual experiences whatsoever). My confidence was down low growing up but I wanted to change that when I started doing my own things after high school.

While growing up I always had high standards and morals for myself. I did not believe in people who cheat, wanted one night stands or fwb. I did not want to degrade myself.

of course the way society is today I find myself as an odd-man out. I don't seem to fit in anywhere. I know I'm not the tallest, strongest, funniest person out there, but I do my best to keep a smile on and keep my shoulders up. Yet doing so can become tiring after so many years.

[xcrunner2414]

Dude, you are the 24 year old version of myself. It is astonishing. I am an athletic, 6'2", well groomed, fair skinned, successful graduate student at an Ivy League school, well on my way to a 6 figure income after I graduate. I cook and clean and definitely want to build a family and be a strong guy for my wife and kids. I too am, technically, a virgin due to my high standards in high school and college. I avoided the casual sex relationships like the plague. And, unfortunately, I was severely depressed at times throughout college.

My first suggestion, which I recently decided to do for myself, is this: if it is in your life, cease all p*rn watching and masturbation induced orgasms. If it is in your life, look up a website called wwwDOTyourbrainonporn.com. Do some research, it's terribly bad for you. Your brain will fix itself within a few months. Start doing non sexual things that used to make you happy.

To answer your actual question lol, I think a girl would be willing to date a depressed guy as long as he is not depressed when he is around her. If you (or I, because I have this problem too) meet a girl who makes you happy, then for god's sake, don't be afraid to express your happiness around her (in a non-creepy, socially acceptable way). Don't mention your depression until you are no longer depressed and you are in a relationship, and then tell her, "yea, I was so totally depressed before I met you."

Good luck.

[SinkIntoDarkness]

True, how I present myself in front of others is a key issue. I can't walk up to someone who I think is interesting and be all "im depressed" or act depressed. In fact that would only make me feel more depressed... I need to work on my confidence and better myself or I'm just screwing myself for life...

[TheManHimself]

yeah, you will never get laid unless you forget about this so called depression.

this depression you have is a creation of your mind, if you had amnesia, nothing that happened in your past would matter

so stop thinking about it and start enjoying life, enjoy every breath you have, the sun, the night, etc.. being alive is enough reason to be happy

girls love guys with a smile, smile as much as you can, as hard as you can, when a girl sees a guy smiling from a far she thinks he is cool and she wants to get f***ed by him

so be happy, smile, be around women more, be super patient, and girls would give up their butt to you

it is so easy to be happy and smile, that it comes down to just making that decision, in fact that's all girls want to know from a guy

the reason why girls make ugly faces or say stupid things, is to see if you react, just to see if you are faking being happy

if you remain happy and chill regardless what they say and do, then it is just a metter of time before they are on their knees with yor penis in their mouth

[SinkIntoDarkness]

Like I said I'm working on turning things around. I go to therapy and have self-help books to battle my depression which is working slowy just got to adapt. It takes time to heal. If I go in thinking I'm depressed then I already lost the battle...

[TheManHimself]

All that stuff doesn't help, just let it go, take a breath and realize you are here, there is no reason to be depressed, even if you were living on the streets, you are alive, that's enough reason to be happy. It is not hard at all, just let it go, if you can be happy non-stop you will have a real vagina to pound faster than you think.

[Anonymous]

Major depressive disorder is a medical condition, and much like diabetes or asthma, people with depression do not choose to be depressed. I am sorry that you have struggled with depression, it is truly hard to overcome depressive symptoms (the guy I am dating also has Major Depressive Disorder). You sound like you have some personal struggles that you are working on, but beyond that, you seem to be a great guy who is working towards bettering your life. Wish you all the best in life, I have faith that you will find the right girl for you someday.

[Anonymous]

Out of respect for you, I would wait until you felt more comfortable with yourself; dating someone now could impede the process.

A lot of people are depressed. It's the most common mental disorder treated by therapists/psychologists. While your depression shouldn't effect you getting a girl, you have to be comfortable and confident in yourself first.

Keep working on you, and a girl will follow. Trust me.

[udolipixie]

I want to know would women consider dating someone with depression that is turning things around.

Not this gal as there are plenty of hot guys that aren't depressed that I can date.

Gals in general though would probably be interested if you're attractive, appealing, interesting, wealthy, or high status enough perhaps even taking it upon themselves to be your savior and make you happy.

[SinkIntoDarkness]

I see your point. I have a lot to work on about myself. If anything I need to focus on "me" for the time being. To rush into a relationship thinking I need a savior just sounds selfish. Thanks for making me realize that.

[anonymous_d]

I have a response for you but it's too long and detailed to put on here... So either message me or add me on kik: danielle...d

Hope to hear from you :)