Free Yourself From Shame Once And For All

[pavlove]

I was listening to a really interesting podcast where the lead singer of a popular band, Passion Pit, came out as gay and it got me to thinking. We go through so much depending on how "shameful" our perceived flaw is to ourselves and to others. We live a life of constant pain and mood swings simply because we cannot allow that part of ourselves to exist in the sight of others with a sense of pride and love.

Such examples are being gay, having social anxiety, being abused, being fat, not being the majority race etc.

What they all have in common is a belief that you will not be accepted if you accept it. That to accept it would be to take on an identity that is less than everyone else. Yet it follows you around wherever you go. Stopping you anytime you ever try to be happy with yourself. How does one fight this?

CHANGE YOUR PERSPECTIVE ABOUT IT

People who have one of these perceived flaws and i say perceived because they aren't flaws at all but MANY see them as such. You have to first think that it's amazing since it makes you, you. If you were to lose it entirely you so much of your life would be different and you wouldn't have a lot of things that you do have. You have become you because of it so it's wrong to want it any other way. Anything can be a source of pride if you choose to see it that way. Fat can be better than skinny short can be better than tall a cup can be better than d cup. the problem lies in the fact that you too well what OTHER people think and you want to think like them. Yet people take their cues on others values based on how they seem themselves. If John thinks he's that hilarious dancing fat guy i see him that way. If Mary sees herself as this useless walrus i see her that way. Figure out a way to love what you are and stop hoping you'll one day be someone else.

SHARE. SHARE. SHARE

A lot of people want to talk to people on tv or in magazines who go through what they go through. Being someone who's famous is really just a metaphor for someone who shares their life, their art, or themselves in some other way to the public. When you walk out your door its a new opportunity to share your humor, your intelligence, and even your social anxiety and show them someone they've never met before and someone they'll never forget. Meeting you is a significant part of their life even if they don't remember it afterwards somewhere in their minds your image is stored. You've made an impression and that counts so don't be afraid to take that as far as you can.

IT MAY TAKE TIME TO DEVELOP A SHIELD

When someone insults the way you you look and you look like James Bond it's easy to shake it off. But when you've always felt like a fat slob and someone teases you that you look like you want a cupcake, it's natural to take a little harsh. Yet, even if you were once ashamed it doesn't mean you'll always and forever be the victim of endless fat shaming. I'm someone who naturally catches people eye and i won't lie a lot of the time it's negative. at first i was hurt then i was angry then i was tired and then i just ignored it and finally i took it as an opportunity again to SHARE SHARE SHARE even with people who hate your guts. The best feeling in the world is someone who hates you, but you don't hate. It's empowering but it comes with time. Being disliked especially for something you're sensitive can hurt but just remember what they're mocking is nothing to be ashamed of.

[HookingSwan]

Insightful :D

hehe I wanted to be more eloquent than this, but I'm too sleepy lol

Anyways, great Take :)