How God took away my shame

[jennifer_bloom]

As a kid, I felt shame a dozen times a day cause my parents would both yell at me and tell me I was stupid or ugly or masculine or fat or weird and I was socially awkward at school leading to harassment by bullies and guys who were angry at me for rejecting them. I was so easy to control cause I was terrified of not being liked by others.

When I learned to trust in God at 20, it was like a huge weight had been lifted, I’d go years without shame or guilt, people could no longer influence me and when I sinned against God, I would feel remorse and fear and not self-hatred and anxiety. God had taken away my shame and guilt. God had forgiven me and offered me a new opportunity to serve and obey Him.

Now I only feel ashamed when I do something wrong. Not being liked by others has no impact on my mood, and even with CoVid lock downs, God’s love keeps me satisfied so I’m not lonely. It is no longer shame that I fear, but separation from the God who kisses every wound in my soul and heals me.

[tatianamay]

I'm so so sprry that you had to go through that. I totally feel you. I am sort of going through the exact same thing now. I'm socially awkward, and my mom makes me feel ugly. I hate the fact that she dpes not realize how toxic she is being. She does not understand how hurtful and damaging it is. She is one of the main reasons why my anxiety worsened and my self esteem is incredibly low. Not blaming her for everything, but yeah, what she is doing is wrong. I still fail to understand why some parents do this to their own children. If you cannot raise your kids well, or if you gave birth to them only to hurt them, why did you have kids in the first place anyway? Some things are truly horrifying.

I'm glad you are doing much better now. Ignore all the toxicity and welcome positivity and love. Always keep smiling and shining. *BIG HUGS* ❤

[littlelady1234]

Wow I can relate to this I’m so many ways: I know what you’ve been through cause I’ve had some things similar. I’m not all the way confident yet but I’m getting ther. Your post just gave me motivation and security. Thank you

[Craftsman]

Parents often do things that harm more than help. Unfortunately, there are no manuals on how to be a good parent and how to raise a child. We all have to wing it on that, and often we fail to fly right.
Somehow, we seem to survive, and some of us even thrive. To me it sounds like you have taken adversity and grown beyond it. Turning to God is a good way to do that.
Shaming is a poor method of child rearing. I was shamed for being a boy, being near-sighted, being too tall for my age, being a foreigner in a land of which I did not know the language. I still resent some of my childhood, though I would not trade the experience for anything. It made me stronger, more "upright in the eyes of God and man" and all around a better person. At least I hope I'm a better person.
I suspect you too have become a better person, a stronger person, through it and in spite of it. That does not excuse what parents did, or failed to do. It simply says you are a strong and caring human.
Adversity either makes or breaks people. I am quite happy that many overcome and transcend their history. You sound like you have.
It is said, in the circles I travel in, "When human strength and wisdom fail, Divine assistance is promised and given to us through the medium of prayer." You have found that.
But I'm rambling.
Here's an offered cyber-hug: (((jennifer_bloom)))

[loves2learn]

I’m really glad to hear you are no longer plagued with that shame. The way parents treat children has an incredible impact on their self esteem. And it can be so very damaging. It’s far to easy to make the mistake my parents did and focus on a child’s flaws. I go out of my way to tell my children when they are being a good friend, being nice to each other, have good manners, etc. I want them to feel good about themselves.

[collie22]

so true hun, we all fall short and when we repent God forgives us and that feels good. by the way i was studding Mark 13:13 this morning , you might like to read it. collie

[alance99]

Nice Mytake 🙂