My ex says we can still talk and message?

[Anonymous]

my boyfriend recently broke up with me, he says i can talk to him anytime, message him anytime, and he started crying when he broke up with me.

i saw him again today and i asked him what the real reason was and he says he just doesn't want a relationship right now. he also said he didn't treat me well, like i put in too much effort and he can't give back because of uni and work.etcetc

he was breaking up with me though, i wouldn't have thought he wouldve cried?

Updates

+1 y

he also said 'im sorry i screwed up'

[bohemiancleopatra]

he still has feelings for you obvious but maybe he is overwhelm with so many responsibilities and commitments he already has to where he can't carry on a relationship right now i would stay in contact with him but allow space for him to miss you and want to see how your doing i think space will get him to miss you not only more but want to try to have a relationship again with you i do believe in the sang/quote space makes the heart grow founder so im sure he will grow toward you once he grows more as a person and develops stability as a independent person with a stable job and schedule im sure he will come back to you especially if you show signs of not moving on and just staying single

[Asker]

we are currently in exam period so i guess that triggers it as well, hmm fair points what you said, he says we'll catch up after exams etc etc, is that weird he said to catch up straight after exams? he also said i hope you found closure so i guess he won't miss me?

so for now, should i not contact him until after exams?

thanks for the help by the way :)

[bohemiancleopatra]

I don't know you should let him put in the effort to contact you you don't wanna always be the one reaching out to him you wanna feel wanted and he needs to show he cares i think every girl shows enough that they care about a guy now let the man be a man and be man enough to come up to you ik he could be stress over exams cause that is a stressful matter but you will feel more at ease or secure with ur heart trusting him not to hurt you if he puts the effort in to communicating with you first and doing things first for you

[Asker]

fair point, thanks for your help :0

[bohemiancleopatra]

Your welcome =)

[Le_Franglais]

This is exactly what happened with the girl I was dating a while back... she ended it for the same reasons.

It's not easy to tell you what's going on through his head, but it could be one of many things:

1- he's being sincere about not wanting any sort of commitment, and is breaking up with you so to not string you along.

2- He's fallen out of love/ isn't interested anymore and is letting you go softly

3- He's being a douche (like my ex) and keeping you on tabs.

[Asker]

i think its all of those put together hahhaha, so should i never speak to him again?

[Le_Franglais]

Slowly, but surely, show him the door out of your life.

[Asker]

yeah i dont think he wasn't interested but i think thats a part of it cuse he did try and fix it up like suggesting solutions on how to make it better etc, but i think he just probably gave up-didnt see me in his future i guess, oh well i mean shit happens aye hahahha thanks for your help

[Le_Franglais]

You're welcome :) I'm sure you'll find someone better any way, you sound like a nice lass

[Asker]

thankyou ahah well i did shout him lunch on Valentine's day so i thought i was a good girlfriend hahaha