My ex fuck buddy and I have a weird relationship?

[Anonymous]

Last year we decided to be fuck buddies, then we both got into relationships with different people. After they finished, we started talking and just talking over text.
On Valentine's a month ago, he took me to the cinema and back to mine.
We met up again a few weeks later and went back to his to watch films. We ended up sleeping together.
Before this, he was telling me that he doesn't want a relationship because he wants to focus on his career. But why would he fuck me if he knows it'll complicate things? Also the way we are together is basically like we're in a relationship but aren't. I don't really know what to do. We haven't really spoken in over a week.

[Dansexual]

You were fuck buddies but think having sex will complicate things? Complicate what? It's just sex.
And how is he acting like you are in a relationship if he hasn't spoken to you in a week?
I don't think you have a weird relationship, I think your views on what a relationship is and what a fuck buddy is is weird :)

[kambo_trick3y]

The bigger question is, why would YOU let HIM fuck you if you knew it would complicate things?

He told you before fucking you.

You're probably one of those types who throw common sense out the window and listens to their genitals first.

[DocT1977]

Yeah, She strikes me as that type. Anyone who believes in the "fuck buddy" system is pretty much not thinking with what's upstairs.

[thesunstillshines]

She fucked him from the start and when he comes back and says that she seems all confused
She's so naive.

[Asker]

He told me that it might then into a relationship.
When I went round his a few weeks ago, I said no many times!
I do have common sence thank you. If you don't intend to help then please fuck off. Thank you.

[DocT1977]

@thesunstillshines A guy is not gonna feel the need to earn a girl that seems to be easy as she is. She's one of them "hit it and quit it" sort of deals. These are always the same types that always bitch because their guys won't stay around.

[kambo_trick3y]

"Before this, he was telling me that he doesn't want a relationship because he wants to focus on his career."

No, I won't fuck off. YOU said this, not me.

Don't blame me for YOUR lack of information. Learn to take responsibility for what you type out. Be an adult.

[thesunstillshines]

Dude you're easy and lack common sense. If you didn't you wouldn't ask this and would know the game

[Asker]

He said he didn't want a relationship a few weeks ago! Not when we started fucking a YEAR ago.

[kambo_trick3y]

And yet here you are, having fucked him even AFTER he said it just a few weeks ago. Are you seriously trying to place the blame somewhere else and none of it on yourself?

[Asker]

We had sex once. Since this time last year.

[DocT1977]

If he was nothing more than a fuck buddy to you, Then why is how he see the current state of the relationship even matter if he is just a "fuck buddy" and that's it?

[thesunstillshines]

Dude just drop it with her. She just doesn't get it

[kambo_trick3y]

Did you, or did you not, sleep with him AFTER he specifically told you he didn't want a relationship?

Did you, or did you NOT, as an adult, make YOUR OWN choice to fuck him?

[kambo_trick3y]

@thesunstillshines

I'll drop it after she answers this last question, promise. I have to educate her, people like her need to get slapped sometimes in order to wake them up.

[Asker]

That's not very nice.

[kambo_trick3y]

I don't care about "being nice."

I care about educating you. Sometimes in order to educate a person, you need to slap them in the face with reality. That's what this is.

You can either deny reality and responsibility like a little immature child, or you can actually wake up and take responsibility for your life choices and grow as an adult.

And don't think for a SECOND I will accept your immature denial and bullshit, I will not fuck off.

[Asker]

I've stopped talking to him. And will not duck him again. I'm talking to another guy.

[kambo_trick3y]

Did you learn your lesson? If not, you're going to repeat your mistake.

[Asker]

Yes I have. I know he's not good for me in any way.

[foxloversi]

@asker
Listen to this guys, he speaks wisdom and although it's not nice to hear it, you will profit from it in a long run.

[lumos]

The cut off all contact with him, since the both of you want different things. You know you'll most likely keep having sex with him as long as you keep in touch with each other. He clearly doesn't want you as his girlfriend and you want more, so you're better off ignoring him from now on and finding someone else.

[Asker]

It's not like I'm waiting for him. I'm taking to another guy. Thanks

[thesunstillshines]

How would it make things complicated? You started as fucked buddies and he will most likely always see you as that. Did you really expect a relationship with him?

[Asker]

I did expect a relationship because he told me that. He said that he was going to take me in dates and stuff. That was a year ago, I got with my ex and was very happy.
He helped me after we split but we didn't meet up or anything. Only text.

[thesunstillshines]

Just because he is taking you on dates doesn't mean anything. You were fucked buddies at first then he got a girlfriend. Then comes back and says he doesn't want a relationship. WHAT IS SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND? you're A CUM DUMPSTER TO HIM. GET THAT THROUGH YOUR THICK SKULL!

[Asker]

Seriously go fuck yourself! You sound like an arse hole!

[thesunstillshines]

And you're dumb and naive

[Asker]

I'm far from dumb love.

[thesunstillshines]

😂😂😂😂😂😂

[abundantlyrich]

It only feels weird because you're missing out on the emotional aspect of connection and all you do is just have sex and that's it.

[abundantlyrich]

It won't complicate things because you will cut this off.

[DocT1977]

I see this happen all the time. Sex is intended to be one of many things that reinforce a bond between a male and a female. All the time you hear about emotions coming into things like this. So the question is, since you know emotions are going to come into the mix sooner or later, Why do YOU do it?

[Asker]

Because I like him

[foxloversi]

According to your description, this guy is not really into you and is looking for someone else, but keeps you as a stress relief/backup.

[thesunstillshines]

Exactly

[Asker]

I've told him on many occasions that I don't want to fuck anymore. I only want to be friends but when we're together, he changes me.

[foxloversi]

That only proves he wants only sex from you. It would be perfectly ok if your emotions weren't invloved, but they are, aren't they?

[Asker]

They were but not anymore. When we actually had sex, I didn't get any feelings for him. But a year ago I did.

[foxloversi]

Well if there are no feelings where is the problem?

[Cafecita]

Because he sees you as a back up. It happened to me and unless he says straight out that he wants something more, it's never going to progress as a relationship.

[I_M_LEGEND]

friends with benifits never seem to end well huh?