Why does he keep hitting me?

[Anonymous]

one of my guy friends hits me all the time. he will punch and poke my side and stomach really hard. he will pull my hair, literally kick my ass, trip me in the hallway, push me into a wall, slap me in the face and smack the back of my head. he also makes sexual comments like, "my god, your boobs are huge" or "you have a sexy ass". i have lots of bruises and red marks from him hitting me and such. i tell him to stop it but he laughs and keeps going. what should i do and why is he doing this?

[Levin]

I think the lesson here for you to learn is one of (inadequate) boundaries. Alas, in life, if you're too soft, and too nice, people will walk all over you, in every sphere. You don't want to speak up, for fear of being mean, or the consequences of an ostensibly tougher opponent. But not to stand up in this situation is worse, since the guy is trampling over your dignity. You need to empower yourself. Get angry, and tell him to fuck off. Sometimes a direct 'fuck off' is exactly what is needed. Or he'll keep pushing, and pushing, and it won't go away.

I'm not sure of the psychology on his end. It's irrelevant in any case. There are two people in an abusive relationship. There's the abuser, and the abused. Generally, except in particular circumstances, it requires the tacit permission (by not speaking up) of both parties for the situation to persist. Telling him to stop for good, firmly, and if he doesn't respect that, then you want to be around him any more.

You have no barriers. Barriers are needed in life to keep out pernicious influences, to maintain your dignity, and to do what is right for *you*. You should feel sufficient self esteem that the *you* is worth standing up for. That is it.

[BobbyBrown23]

He's just into kinky stuff, like beating the shit out of you in bed.

[Asker]

he has a girlfriend though...

[BobbyBrown23]

He wants to have a sadomasochist threesome.

[Brittanymaexoxo]

If a guy is mean to you he likes you. In some cases that is true but what he's doing is being plain mean! I would not even consider him a friend. It's okay to mess around but that goes too far. I think you should tell him you don't like the way he us treating you and it makes you feel uncomfortable! Stand up for yourself darling.

[DoctaKay]

Is this your friend? Abuse can exist in a types of relationships. If you feel uncomfortable, which I believe you do, stop all contact with this person. This is domestic abuse and you should not tolerate this from any person, so-called friend of not.

[opugh93]

You should discontinue hanging out with him if he hits you hard enough that you have marks. Huge red flag there.

[Vesuvius87]

I'm curious why is he still your friend? Just like getting rid of an abusive boyfriend, make him your ex friend immediately.

[Damiandash312]

Don't stand for this shit cuz it'll only get worse for you or his next victim. Break the no snitching rule...

[NervousToTheMax]

Sexual harassment much? Sounds like you aren't making yourself clear about stopping his intentions.

[emerald77]

What the fuck? Tell him to stop who the hell does that?

[puncakegirl]

Slap him in the middle of a crowd and call him a perv

[Jonhnny11]

It doesn't matter why he is doing what he is doing. It is not okay. If he will not listen to you then you need to get help from someone who is not playing a role in the situation.

[goretcki]

He's your friend? That ain't right, you need to stay away from him.

[BlushingKitty]

I would get out of that as soon as possible because if you keep letting him do that and not say anything about it then it can get worse and worse.

[Anonymous]

He's a fuckin perv, what the hell? He needs to get laid. Ew.

[phanindra554]

Just call the cops