Giving her the gift of missing you?

[Anonymous]

I'm conflicted on this. People say by not talking to someone for a couple weeks will make them wonder why they haven't called you in a while. However, it seems to me that men and women work differently on this due to their different psychologies. It seems that it works for women when they don't contact men--men will start thinking about them all the time. It doesn't seem to work as well when men do it to women--from my experience, it seems that not talking to a woman for a few days will cause her to forget you, rather than think about you. Any other thoughts on this?

[SugaSpice09]

I pretty much agree with what the other ladies have said. For most females, ignoring her makes her think YOU are not thinking about her. When you finally do contact her, she may feel a little flattered but if you keep doing it eventually she will grow to resent you. As for your reply to one of the comments, I don't know how much the "friend zone" exists with females. If a female is interested in you from the beginning, and you show her interest, she is not going to put you into a friend zone. The only exception to this rule is if she happens to start dating someone else in the interim period when you are dragging your feet to really make things official. Other than that, you don't "end up in the friend zone", the truth is you've always been there you just didn't know it. I am not a huge believer in inherent differences between men and women, but one thing I do notice to be true is that men seem to like the chase more than women because they tend to get bored more easily. So things that would turn a man on (being left hanging for a while) actually frustrate a female. So, in response to your question, females will wonder why you haven't called in a while only instead of being intrigued we are frustrated by it and that frustration (if continued) turns to resentment when it continues.

[janedoe333]

I guess it depends all on whether she plays games or not. Coming from experience as a girl who plays games, you can't just flat out ignore her, that will make her think you just don't give a crap about her and she won't be flattered by it. When you show too much interest she will take advantage of it, knowing she can have you whenever its convienient for her. However, if you subtly show some interest but also ignore her somewhat, she will be intrigued. When you show a little interest but also act a bit standoffish, it makes her secondguess herself and whether she can have you or not. That's a good thing. Pretty much what I'm trying to say is you won't get much respect from a girl if you give too much interest, or if you flat out ignore her, she will move on not giving you much thought. But by doing a little of both, she should be intrigued and interested. Hope that helps.

[Asker]

Good response. I guess you're saying unpredictability matters, as well, because you can go 2 or 3 days without any contact then randomly pop up and seem interested.

[janedoe333]

Yeah, that's exactly right. When a guy is unpredictable I am always curious, never knowing what he's thinking or what his next move will be.

[QueenKatie]

To be completely honest with you, I think it's an utterly stupid principle not to call.

Women like guys who care. Guys who are into them. That doesn't mean we want you running around under our feet continually like over-excited lapdogs, and we definitely don't want you stalking us like something creepy from a horror movie either. But we do want you to be polite and pay us some attention. Not calling is rude and inattentive, and plays games with another person's feelings. It's much better to be open and honest in the way you deal with a prospective partner, as this leads to the development of trust and emotional closeness, whereas not calling just looks arrogant, or feels like a rejection.

[Asker]

But you can't be too polite, because you get stuck in friend zone. That's why guys play these games. Isn't it more effective to make contact, then make none for 3 or 4 days, then go make contact again?

[Tew33zy]

No u are wrong and the writer wrote the question incorrect. He applied it incorrectly, u should not ignore her, just delay giving yourself to her when she has not earned it. Scientific study revealed that woman are more attracted to men who’s feelings are unclear. The moment you become to clear she looses interest and starts playing games, texting back days later, calling off dates with you at the last moment, leaving you on read etc. These are what natural woman dye when they have low interest in you. Woman get so many approaches by Men who are much more accomplished then you, have more money than you etc but they are needy, thirsty and unveiled their feelings in the first date. This is unattractive because it takes away her emotional energy to chase, woman are like cats. If you chase them they will run away, if you ignore them they will come sit in your lap and purr…. Soon you start showing the car to much love they jump off your lap and go somewhere else u are smothering them. In a sense u have to with hood your feelings and allow a woman to do what she’s natural at, chasing a little. It’s a scientific fact that Woman are more intrigued with Men who’s feelings are unsure. Men have become so Beta male traits that they think after a date or sex they want a relationship and it’s needy behavior. Then they message her and she’s busy and can’t get back to you so u start blowing her phone up etc etc chasing her showering her with voicemails, emails, text and missed calls and it turns them off. Woman have to weed these guys out early otherwise she can be killed later so woman intentionally ignore you for a day or two just to make sure your not possessive, controlling, needy and thirsty. These are signs he won’t handle rejection and your safety will be in jeopardy in case you leave him.

[Tew33zy]

Pt.2
Now, that’s kinda a rough draft into why you should be unclear in the beginning. Now, he still worded it wrong that ain’t what we say. Actually it’s when a woman disrespects you, you give her the gift of missing you. 96% of Men are Beta males carrying Beta traits. When a woman disrespects him he rewards her with dinner, movies, money and gifts. He is afraid that if he stands up to himself she will leave him or not have sex with him so he stays away from her bad side. This behavior makes you weak and beta. The Woman senses ur weak and tries u more and more until your wrapped around her hand. Then she will chew you up and spit you out once she done. She will leave because your to easy to run over. Mentally a woman wants a Beta male she can run but then she realizes she needs a real masculine man who will stand up to her and won’t take her bs and walks away from never to look back if she ever disrespects you again, that’s wt they want without knowing it. Then they will respect you. Remember, when she disrespects you u give her the gift of missing you. If she doesn’t disrespect you u still give her the gift of missing you. If u don’t know how to do it that’s great, keeps u out of my league.

[Sexy-Senior-09]

If the girl likes you a lot then this will work, but don't go with no contact for a long time. Max is 2 days

[Asker]

Well, I went without contacting her for three days, and almost four, but she ended up cracking and contacting me. So I can't be all that wrong, can I?

[itssarahloveee]

I always found that when the guy doesn't call, it's because he lost interest. If you're trying to get a girls attention, don't go more than 2 days without at least texting her once. I mean, I hate it when I'm talking to a guy and he stops talking. It drives me insaneee. I talk to my guy everyyday and I'm quite content doing so.

[Asker]

But isn't the whole point is to drive you insane? Wouldn't that keep you thinking about the guy?

[itssarahloveee]

Well, for me in just gives me that horrible feeling in the pit of my stomache. Of course, I check my phone every 2 seconds and I think about him all the time, but once he texts me or calls me it's more a relieved feeling than a 'oh hey there:)' feeling. When I get a 'good morning beautiful' text, that is much more efficient, I think about him all day.

[lorahayes]

ignoring a woman for a few weeks will make her think you don't like her, and will make her think you are a jerk for not contacting her, and will consequently make her dislike you and want to forget about you. its a very silly idea. a girl wants to know if a guy is interested, not playing games.

[ixi10]

I text the guy I'm dating everyday and we're perfectly fine. I think texting every 5 minutes is overdoing it, but a few times a day is sweet. It gives me something to look forward to.

[DangerIsis]

yes but if you stop texting her she'll pull out her hair.
it'll seem like you're uninterested.

starting is when you get to know each other...so get to know her!

[Asker]

But isn't the point of "giving her the gift of missing you" is having her pull out her hair? So she doesn't take you for granted?

[DangerIsis]

No. when she misses you too much she realizes you're not worth it if you don't pay attention to her. just text her!

she'll pull out her hair for awhile but girls want to feel pretty, and texting her (or even better, calling her.) will make her feel pretty.

[Asker]

Okay, fair enough, so that would mean text her once a day?

[DangerIsis]

Yes. initiate a conversation 5-7 days per week.

you start the conversation, but if she doesn't answer don't keep texting.

thats the cool way to go about it :P

[demolitionlover4]

When I was dating my boyfriend, he would text me every couple of days telling me he missed me. After about a month of dating he started with the everyday texting, and I have to say, I personally enjoy it when a man makes it known that he is missing her. It shows that he's sensitive to her, and it shows that he is sharing his feelings with her. A simple text goes a LONG way in letting a girl know you care :)

[Anonymous]

its always been the opposite for me. girl misses guy and guy disappears/looses interest