My cousin keeps glancing at me and then looking away when I catch him?

[Anonymous]

Last night all of our close family went out for a meal and my cousin kept staring at me with a blank face he kept looking away whenever I caught him. he did come over to where I was sat and he said opposite me and said your alright and I replied with yeah and then we were generally chatting and I seen his pupils got bigger? I know this is a weird question but he's never done this before? im 15 and he's 16.

[OlderAndWiser]

You may think this is gross or weird, but he may have the hots for you. Many people would consider a cousin-cousin relationship to be incestuous, but that is a very iffy issue. Prohibitions against incest are found in the Bible but it never forbids cousin-cousin relationships. In about half of the US states, it is legal to marry your first cousin. If cousins are married in a state where their marriage is legal, their marriage will be treated as a legal marriage even if they subsequently move to another state where cousin-cousin marriages are not permitted.

The legal aspect of this is only one issue. You may feel that it is a gross or weird thing. . . or maybe you're flattered. How do you feel about his attention if it is motivated by a romantic interest in you?

[Asker]

To be honest I've never had this happen before so I wouldn't know what to do about it? But we both go to school together and whenever I see him around he doesn't look at me or acknowledge me?

[OlderAndWiser]

So maybe he just started having this feelings. . . if that's what it is.

[Asker]

Why is he ignoring me around school then?

[OlderAndWiser]

He may be feeling uncomfortable about having urges and feelings towards a cousin and maybe avoiding you is the best way for him to handle those feelings.

[Asker]

When I see him around school I dont see him associate with anyother girls in his year and there really pretty who could get boys? unlike me. Not saying I would date him, I mean I would but its wrong.

[OlderAndWiser]

Sometimes, the prettiest girl isn't the one who gets a guy's attention.

You are under 18 and you must make sure that everything you do is consistent with what your parents expect of you. Maybe this is something that you should discuss with your mother. I know, people your age don't want to hear that; you'd rather have your foot amputated. But. . . if you approach your mother for an adult discussion about an important topic, it will help her to change her thinking about you and to start see you as an emerging adult rather than just a child.

[Asker]

If you were my cousin and doing this but only to me and doesn't asscociate with any other girls. why would you do that?

[OlderAndWiser]

My best guess is that he is feeling a physical attraction to you.

[Asker]

Ok. he's one of the popular guys at school who wouldn't date a girl whos shy and quiet and got good grades in class.

[Anonymous]

Are there any other indications apart from staring?

[Asker]

How do you mean?

[Opinion Owner]

Does he only stare at you? Or does he do other flirty-related stuff towards you?

[Asker]

Yes just me and no.

[Flyenjoe199]

I just read your and Mr. Wiser's conversation and well I agree with every word he said and would also like to give some insight if I may. So for starters I am 16 as you can see and with this the ability to understand what he might be thinking. I am also popular and can say that I do actually like the more shy closed off girls because they are more interesting to me. I would also say he may be feeling attraction towards you not only because he finds you attractive but because you are his cousin. By you being his cousin it means that you have a closeness and familiarity that is hard to obtain. Finally I would add that a cousin and even though this is slightly "shameful", a cousin and I once engaged in acts that are to put it lightly "frowned upon" (not intercourse but close) so I can say that it does happen and I would also recommend if you don't want to talk to your mother talk to him sometime in private. Hope that helps.

[Asker]

thank you so much for taking your time to give me some advice it really helped :)

[Rahdle]

Maybe your beauty caught him off guard and he couldn't stop admiring it. He probably was slightly attracted to you but remembered that you are his cousin and stopped himself. That's pretty normal

[Asker]

Omg!! If I wasn't related to him id date him but I can't.

[Rahdle]

Probably exactly what he's thinking

[Asker]

I definitely would but its wrong and our family would hate us.

[Rahdle]

Haha yeah I'd advise against it. Not a good idea

[Asker]

he was watching my every move like when I got up from the table he was staring at me.

[Rahdle]

Well I bet you're very pretty then (:

[Asker]

Hehe thank you :)

[kunwar007]

He think that you feel same what he is feeling... he thinks that you want something from him

Let it clear to him at very starting... otherwise you can't let him stop

[Asker]

How do you mean he feels the same way?

[JustinCaseUDontKnow]

Yeah i had incidents happen with my first cousin
she is very opened with me and some of my other
cousins are it just makes me little uncomfortable
why these things happen ,,

[Asker]

Why is my cousin doing it then does he like me or something?

[kunwar007]

You are open minded towards him... you both are in same age group... as like you are telling his pupils got bigger... it shows that he is attracted towards you... might be he heard some stories from his friends or through internet that about cousin attracted towards each other

He feels attraction towards you... and when you behave towards him as open minded... he might be thinking that you also dont have any problem... but presently he is scared.. he doesn't know clear what you think... so it is on you to stop him... or not!!

[JustinCaseUDontKnow]

Maybe your that age it's bothering you really hard to say

[Asker]

he's related to me there's nothing I can do I mean he is cute but it would be wrong in so many ways to date him.

[JustinCaseUDontKnow]

I know i agree with you but maybe your going through a stage
and these things happen..

[Asker]

True but why would he pick me to stare at there was plently of girls who were In short dresses he was looking at as well.

[JustinCaseUDontKnow]

Oh it happens really hard to figure out ,

[Asker]

What do you personally think I should do?

[JustinCaseUDontKnow]

You might have to separate your self from him
or talk to someone on why he stares at you
or why he's acting the way he does this is
puzzling for sure?

[Asker]

Ok thank you

[JustinCaseUDontKnow]

Your Welcome ;)

[MyUsernameIsUsername]

My cousin is the same he looks weirdly at me and flirts with me I don't mine cause he cute and all its prolly hormones or something tell him how you feel or make it "cousins with benefits!"

[Asker]

What do you think I should do?

[Klaatu51]

obviously he likes u if he stares at u often

[Asker]

there's loads of other girls who are prettier than me he should like, why me?

[Klaatu51]

maybe u match his taste then? is it hard 2 believe?

[Asker]

Yes because he's a popular guy and all the pretty girls would date him. im just a ugly cousin.

[Klaatu51]

u just THINK u r ugly... u might b pretty for him ;)

for x-ample i like chubby gals (not-so-pretty accordin 2 most guys). if i was a popualr guy... my taste wouldn't change.

[Asker]

Why is it that I always see really handsome guys with girls who wear too much makeup and draw there eyebrows on? Thats what I think he would like and when I see him round school he doesn't acknowledge me what so ever?

[Klaatu51]

" with girls who wear too much makeup and draw there eyebrows on?"<--- then they r not so pretty if they wear 2 much make-up... otherwise they'd go natural i believe

[Asker]

Ah ok, today I saw him down the hall and we made eye contact for a few second then I broke eye contact with him and he kept staring and his eyes got big not really big though?

[Klaatu51]

can;'t u see he likes u then?

[Asker]

Sort of.

[chuppachup]

He's never done what before? I'm confused..

[Asker]

Stare at me then look away when I catch him and he keeps doing it.

[chuppachup]

Sounds like he fancies you.
Dilated pupils are a dead giveaway.
Also, the staring thing

[Asker]

He does smoke.

[chuppachup]

Smoke weed? I don't think that dilates your pupils

[Asker]

Yeah.

[chuppachup]

Weird. It never dilates mine that much.
Well in that case, I've no clue. I've only got the staring thing to go on.

[Asker]

This was how big his eyes were. www.google.co.uk/.../what-do-dilated-pupils-mean.html&h=260&w=200&tbnid=JFy5HV9MEVzSUM:&zoom=1&docid=iQvcamu9_tfBCM&ei=JqKAVcCROePP7gaey4K4CQ&tbm=isch&ved=0CC0QMygPMA9qFQoTCMC8-tGglcYCFeOn2wodnqUAlw

[chuppachup]

Unless his eyes were red then he wasn't stoned. Plus, I don't think anyone in the right mind would go to a family gathering baked.
Those look like pupils dilating in response to being around someone the person is attracted to.

[Asker]

No his eyes werent red and I just dont know what to do now. I would love to date him but I can't because people will think were gross and insest.

[chuppachup]

That's because it is.

[Asker]

Whats because its it?

[chuppachup]

Incest, I mean.

[Asker]

From your point of view what do you think about this situation?

[chuppachup]

I think your cousin is messed up. And I think you should get a grip on your feelings because family is off-limits.
Also, if I were you I would completely ignore him even if he stares at you. If you catch him staring, ask what he's looking at in a kinda "you're Really weird" way, if you know what I mean.

[Asker]

Ok thank you :)

[Anonymous]

Maybe his parents told him a weird story anout you

[Not_Helping]

It's just peek-a-boo.