Do ugly men have any manners and common sense?

[Anonymous]

I am really annoyed by ugly men approaching me everywhere I go including the grocery store. I have no interests in physically unattractive men. I don't care if they have the nicest personality, I just cannot feel attracted to ugly men. They make me want to throw up and put me in a really bad mood to the point that I want to kill them because that seem to be the only way to stop them; they do not take no for an answer.

They don't care how I feel at all and they proceed to insult me by asking me to get a date with me. They don't seem to understand the word "no." I am definitely not interested in stupid men. How can they even think that they have the slightest chance with me who is attractive? I would not approach a super handsome man if my physical attractiveness didn't equal his. I thought this was an unspoken rule. What's wrong with these ugly men? Are they delusional?! Why can't they just leave me alone? or am I wrong to feel this way? What do other women feel like me?

This is a serious problem because I've been stalked several times by different men and sometimes have to hide myself or avoid going to stores so I won't get harassed. I've become so depressed that I became house bound for a few years. What can I do to protect myself? It feels like I have no freedom and sense of security. Sometimes I feel so disgusted that wish I were dead.

[junime3]

Just going to chime in here and let you know, I hear you loud and clear. And whenever you try to speak out about it majority of replies will be 'you heartless bitch' blah blah and people making grand incorrect assumptions about who you are. If you try to talk to other girls about it they think you are conceited. If you try to talk to men about it they just whine about how hard it is to be an ugly duckling. And that you should be 'flattered'. It's bullshit. These people don't know what its like to be constantly persued and harassed and accosted and have to deal with ugly people to the point of nausea. I know when you say ugly you mean the whole view of the person not just their appearance. They just give yoh a gross vibe and you want to run for the hills. Especially when its clear they want to try to touch you for instance trying to shake your hand or touch you in some way to 'show interest'/demonstrate power.

The way to deal with them is only this. Avoid them where you can. Dont make eye contact. To some desperate socially inept people eye contact is like a marriage proposal. Dont smile or laugh at anything they say, theyll think you're in love. Keep your eyes focused on what you're doing, go out with friends when you can. Live your life and enjoy your life no matter what. If one of them tries to force you to converse with them, be civil but dont engage in the talk dont ask questions. Be curt and leave. Dont create excuses for them and dont allow yourself to feel like a victim. You have standards and that is not a crime. Anyone trying to make you feel ashamed for having standards is a moron because EVERYONE has precerences and things they like/dont like. No matter how high and mighty these assholes are talking and whining 'why dont you give ME a chance?'

If they had to comprimise their preferences to be with someone who was their female equivalent they would throw a freaking fit. Brush it off baby.

Live your life. No apologies.

[Anonymous]

manners and common sense has nothing to do with how attractive a person is. a lot of hot people are rude too but they are more likely to be excused for their behavior.

if you don't want an ugly guy to talk to you and a particular one is harrassing you just be really raw with him and tell him that he is too ugly for you and you're not interested. but do this only after a polite rejection didn't work. don't go out of your way to be mean to a guy the first time but if he doesn't get it then be rude to him

[Cool-Relax]

You're not wrong to feel that way, but it's pretty bitchy. Based on what you said in your comment on armyant's answer, you obviously have a complex when it comes to men. Are you sure you're not just writing all guys off as unattractive?

[Asker]

I know it sounds bitchy - because I am p*ssed off by my too frequent encounter with rude men. How would you feel if you get harassed all the time wherever you go? Do you get harassed? or you do things with your friends?

I guess I find most men unattractive. I find women much more attractive in general.

[Cool-Relax]

Harassment is just unwanted or bothersome attention. If you have an aversion to men, any type of advancement will seem like harassment to you. To someone who hasn't been through what you went through, it might not seem so extreme.

[Clarity]

What irks me is if a good looking guy is checking out a girl, she enjoys it. She thinks, "Hey that hunk is checking me out!" but if the guy happens to be ugly, he's a pervert. A creep. Same guy, same actions, same thoughts, just a different face and/or body.

One of the worst parts is watching a good looking guy walk into a room and seeing all of the women's heads turn. I can walk through a room and everyone sees right through me. It's as if I'm not really there. Sometimes I feel invisible.



After years and years of no physical contact, not a sensual second in your life for years, you eventually become very bitter and hate those responsible for you predicament. But it's not really their fault. Who wants to be with someone they can't bear to touch.

It makes a long, lonely, painful existence and many choose to end it. Let's compare pain and suffering now, you poor, put out pretty girl. Such a burden going through life looking pretty. I'd swap with you in a heart beat but hey. There's a solution. Let time do it's work and one day, you'll be old and ugly and no one will give you a second glance.

--

As some ugly guy from some show said:

"You beautiful people got no idea

what unattractive guys go through.

Don't I have a heart? Don't I long to be held,

to be loved, to be cherished?"

[Crimson811]

Well because it’s usually unattractive guys that won’t leave me alone, that’s why. There is a guy at work who pursued me. I didn’t see anything attractive about this guy. I told him I wasn’t interested in him and he still won’t leave me alone.

[jtj25m]

Maybe you're not as hot sh*t as you think you are sweetheart. Maybe these ugly men are approaching a physically ugly woman, you definitely have an ugly personality. By the way, I know I'm not attractive, so let me do you the favor of preventing you from wasting your time pointing it out to me=)

[Asker]

You are wrong. I am not ugly - I am fit and have above average looks. I have no problem attracting good-looking men which proves that I am not ugly. Don't blame me for having an ugly personality because I was not born this way. My horrible and traumatic experiences with ugly men made me feel this way. Try being harassed, stalked, molested by ugly men when you were young and defenseless, and see how you could keep a perfect loving personality!

[jtj25m]

Everyone has crap thrown at them in life. That is no reason to treat others badly when they personally have not done anything wrong to you. You don't want to be stalked and harassed, fine, that's normal. Nobody wants that, but it is no excuse for being outright rude and a btch to people. I'm an extremely nice guy and very respectful of those who afford me respect, and to a point, those that don't too. Being born with spina bifida, and things that resulted from that, I've every reason not to.

[jtj25m]

But I choose to realize, those who haven't done me wrong don't deserve my crap, and I choose to be kind and respectful in spite of what has happened to me basically my whole life. It's a choice, not a condition.

[Asker]

You don't get it -they are the ones being rude to me and disrespect me by disregarding my feelings. I try to be nice to them at first and even talk to them like I would to anyone but they take advantage of that and harass me by keep asking me for my number or a date after my saying no. Some even follow me! What part of this is not rude on their part!? Aren't they the ones being disrespectful to me? You have no idea how it feels like to be a woman and being harassed.

[jtj25m]

No I don't, but I know what it's like to be a man and be harassed. Get over the idea that because you're a woman you somehow deserve different treatment as that statement implies. Or is it that you women are weaker and can't handle the harassment as much so it isn't as fair to you? You get annoyed an btchy when people approach you, and when they ask you out. That is what YOU said, and that is uncalled for. Once they harass you, you're entitled to assert yourself.

[Asker]

I am not trying to be mean and rule to all ugly men! They don't bother me at all as long as they leave me alone! I guess it goes with even the attractive ones - they can also be annoying if I am not interested in them. I just want to be able to go shopping and do my errands without being harassed - that's all. I do, assert myself, to let them know that I am not interested, by the way.

[jtj25m]

Ok, now you're starting to sound more rational dear=P I chalk it up to possibly a misunderstanding on my part, and maybe you not expressing yourself as clearly as you would if you weren't worked up when this was posted at first. I'd be rather ticked off myself if I stated my wishes clearly to someone and they completely disregarded them and continued to bug me. As would anyone I think. You have every right to feel as you do in that case. It just appeared as though you were shooting a shotgun

[jtj25m]

Blast at those who annoyed you, while spraying innocent bystanders with the buck shot as well. Sorry if I came off rude or anything, but disrespect gets my panties in a twist very easily=P

[Asker]

Sorry, if I was unclear. I guess I was just so infuriated that I couldn't explain the situation. I guess I would call anyone "ugly" who annoy me. If they didn't harass me, they remain just "people" to me.

[jtj25m]

That sounds fair enough, and it's fine hon. Obviously we both played a part in not really taking the time to make ourselves clear or understand the other person=P

[Crimson811]

Or maybe she is and he’s just another ugly dude that got rejected by a hot woman. Guys usually can’t take that, it’s a huge blow to their egos. So they assume that the woman that rejected him is unattractive herself. There’s always at least one response like this one on here.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I know how you feel...to an extent. I don't really like ugly girls. And well every girl that's liked me has been ugly. It's really annoying.

I guess if its getting to the point where your getting harassed, then just go shopping and stuff with your friends until you can find a equally attractive male that you like, and then just do stuff with him.

But, yeah sometimes I see ugly people an wonder if they understand how ugly they are, like sometimes it really hurts my eyes to look at the really ugly ones. But, I guess that's just part of life.

[Asker]

I am glad someone understands! I can't help the fact that I am an artist and have a high standard for beauty. I don't like hypocritical people who tell me that I am being superficial. Let's face it - we are all attracted to beauty - studies have proven that even new born babies prefer attractive faces. I am not trying to be mean to all ugly men - I just don't want to date them.

[Opinion Owner]

Lol, yeah, a lot of people have high standards.

i found it funny though how you talked about ugly people as if their like a race, but I guess it sort of is like that if you look at it that way.

but its kind of common sense that people prefer beautiful people over ugly people, I mean yeah people can be beautiful on the inside but if their ugly then that doesn't really matter unless you have a paper bag turn the lights off :P

[Blackmoonsns]

Wow you need to see a therapist. So many things wrong with what you said. I can safely say im not the best looking but far from ugly. I have dated women who were less attractive then i am, i know because people keep telling me i was the hot one in the relationship. If you want men to leave you a lone wear a shit that says leave me a lone. But your hole superficial looks are everything is way out of line. One day you will be old and not attractive just like everyone then maybe you will understand looks are not everything.

[Anonymous]

Looks don't matter in how rude or polite a person is. You probably got this stereotype from the media where most fat men are stupid idiots or clowns who just bumble around and are sleazy. Honestly you need to look at people's souls and not there waste lines/ I'm not saying you need to date a 500 lbs tub of lard. but it sounds like your denying they have a personality. It's like your saying that since they are fat they are automatically nerdy losers who eat fast food all day and play WOW. I mean I am a bigger dude and I'm pretty classy. I like classical music and bluegrass and work out for at least an hour every day. But I guess since I'm ugly I don't have a chance.

[Anonymous]

You know, you are just a bitch who is stereotyping to the extreme. Not all good looking men act like prince charming and have perfect manners, in fact quite a few don't and act like douchebags. Also just because a guy is fat or ugly does not mean he is a god damned Homer Simpson clone. I like to think I am very polite. I hold doors open for girls. I treat them like they should be treated, with respect. Yet because of girls like you, it's thought that I am just a slob. Well deep down insdie your'e probably ugly. However I feel bad that you have been stalked. Maybe you've just had bad experiences. But they probably just saw you and wanted to say high, but you think you are too good for them.

[armyant]

During your childhood you're supposed to develop something called social skills that allow you to deal with people you aren't physically attracted to without becoming self-destructive and depressed. Some people sadly never achieve this, but at least it can be said that their death-wishes may be granted in the most versatile multitude of ways imaginable. Do not lose hope, there is a well and a rock with a rope tied to it somewhere just for you!

[Asker]

I didn't have that luxury in my childhood. I've been tormented/harassed/molested by my mother's fat, ugly boyfriend when I was a teenager and I've become disgusted by men in general. So when ugly men approach me, I feel the same horrible feeling. I wish I didn't have to feel like this.

[armyant]

Like I said, don't lose hope. With that attitude, I foresee a very very bright academical career ahead of you in the department of Women's Studies. You can just write whatever you come up with about ugly awful men and just put all that sh*t in a book and call it a study!

[Asker]

Thank you. It's funny you mentioned Women's Studies. I did take some seminars during my graduate study. I did not write my paper on that particular topic, though. However, my problem represents the treatment of women in our male-dominated society. I would not be harassed like this if they saw me as a respectful person, not as a sex object.

[armyant]

I could possibly feel some sympathy for you if you actually treated men as respectable people, but as it is it's more like a very fortuitous taste of your own medicine.

[Asker]

I would treat men as respectable people if they behave like it! Respect must be earned.

[armyant]

And they would treat you as a respectable person if you earned it. I guess you're at an impasse.

[Asker]

How do I earn respect from men when they see all women as sex object? They could earn my respect if they were not so rude by making comments on my physical attributes and my ethnicity. Remember, I do not approach them, they initiate the move. I just want to do my shopping and errands by myself being undisturbed. Would YOU respect a strange guy who makes sexual/racial comments to you? You have NO IDEA what kind of losers I have to deal with.

[armyant]

By saying they see all women as sex objects it is you who are generalizing them. I am surprised you do not see the hypocrisy of this approach.

[armyant]

Oh, and naturally you should be allowed to conduct your business uninterrupted.

[Asker]

I didn't say "all" men - read carefully. I wrote that I cannot respect men who treat women as sex objects, unfortunately, there are many. I know there are many respectable men and I do respect and love my male friends, colleagues, professors, etc. I am not talking about all men here - only the ones that annoy me intentionally! Get it?

[armyant]

It is still as much of a generalization as I saying every obese woman out there who looks at me wrong all share some arbitrary opinion regarding men.

[dudeawsome]

the problem is they've ben rejected so many times they really just don't care they came to reality a long time ago and almost a knife to their wrist when they just decided to say well F*** this I don't care what people think I'm going to try like hell and do whatever I want that's how they think. but how would I know I'm charming as hell and have had a surprising amount of women tell me that sounds like a lie right but its not.

[Robertcw]

Woah. Slow your roll. It’s not your place to tell other not to approach you.

It’s not harassment to say hello.

I’m sorry than ugly men ruin your day, make you want to vomit and generally feel like shit — but get over it. This is a form of entitlement that you’re expressing here. You deserve to be superior to those horrible ugly men. How DARE they so much as look your direction or GOD FORBID, say ‘hello’ to you in the grocery store. CAN’T HAVE THAT. 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄.

[Anonymous]

hahahahha I think your doing that "Troll" thing.

cuz every1 loves attention. I like when ugly ass hoes approach me...

i know your ugly as f*ck because you did it anaymous >.>

[Absolute_Revenge]

Everyone, Ignore this piece of feminist crocodile shit. She's here for the lulz.

[Anonymous]

calm down susan boyle

[Italo_DiscoFever]

Lol.