My friend-turned-f*** buddy is being a d**k?

[ezs_595w]

I've been close friends with this guy for about three years. He's in a band and he's a bit of a "lad" - very popular with women, etc. We were close friends until he moved to a different city and got a girlfriend. He bumped into my brother about 6 months after he left and sent me a message saying "bumped into your brother tonight, where are you nowadays? Miss you mate x". Anyway, after that he invited me to see his new band in his new city and I did. We then stayed in touch right up until he broke up with his girlfriend. About 5 months after he split up with her, he was ringing me all the time - having 2 hour conversations with me. We'd talk about how I was struggling with my studies and mental health - and how he didn't wanna live in the city anymore. We'd also talk about the girls he was seeing - he'd always mention a reason why it would never work with them (she's too demanding/she doesn't calm me down like you do). When I finished at college, we went out with our other mates and ended up sleeping together. When he went home he said "you're my best friend you know, a true friend". However, his best (male) mate said that my friend makes deliberately avoids being seen talking/dancing with me when we're out drinking as a group. But then, when we're on our own, we're such good friends. This mate said he thinks he does it because he doesn't have many friends that are girls, but I don't understand why that would make a difference? The next time I slept with him (about four days later) he lay down for 5 minutes and then said "Ah I forgot I needed to be at home by 9am" (it was like 7.20am). I was mortified and being drunk quite upset, so I said "you treat me like crap". He went MAD, calling me a psycho and called me his ex-girlfriends name. So I let him leave. I then text him two days later asking if he was around - no reply. What should I do? I don't wanna lose a mate but I don't want him to think I like him more than a mate and hassle him with texts. WHATS HE THINKIN?

[shadowlegend]

You had an arrangement as fuck-buddies, he doesn't owe you an emotional compensation, the dynamic has changed. He will sleep with you, that's your purpose, then get on with his day. If you don't like it then don't enter into that arrangement. You aren't just his friend anymore and so he will treat you differently when you guys aren't behaving in a "friend" way, aka screwing each other.

[heavenonearth]

This is why it's often an especially bad idea to have casual sex with close friends. It complicates everything, and can ruin a perfectly good friendship.

You already texted him, so you should just leave it be until he wants to talk and contacts you.

[Fusionpredz]

Did u want him to make you breakfast or something? It seems he wants to keep living the bachelor life and not be settled down. He's thinking not to drive your wandering mind astray, at 29 probably what happens to woman. Leave him alone, text him if you want a casual fling otherwise continue as friends. Don't make it awkward, he didn't seem too.

[Fearless_banana]

Nice novel OP. Mind using paragraphs or cliff notes next time? This is eye poison.

[CompleteStranger1234]

Lose the zero, get with a hero...

[apple24]

No date friend!