Should I text him after 2 weeks of no contact or not?

[Anonymous]

So, I met this guy on Tinder. He was nice, charming and respectful. Same age as me. We cleared things about what we are looking for quite early. Neither of us was interested in hooking up, one night stands, etc. There were no red alarms, no weird signs, no bad gut feelings, nothing. Usually my gut always tells me when something is not right. He always stated how honesty is really important to him and asked me to be always direct and honest. We had a really good chemistry. Online and in real. Sex also happened and it was great. After sex nothing really changed - we chatted the same amount, he was still interested in me. I was surprised, because usually I am really cautious about letting someone getting under my skin. But even after sex he remained the same: nice, charming, respectful and looked still very interested in me. A week after sex he asked me out again. Evening before our date, he cancelled it. Saying there was some family emergency stuff. He apologized for cancelling and seemed honest about it. I wished him good luck with whatever is going on, we said goodbye and than he had to go to the family. After this I have never heard from him again. I never tried to contact him as well. I noticed he also deleted his Tinder account (but he was active on some other chat app we used to text).
Now it`s been almost 2 weeks without any word from him, without any contact. I also haven't tried to contact him in any way, because I believe if a person is really interested, he/she will try to contact you. But I haven't done anything in order to contact him as well, so I guess I`m living by double standards? I dont know.

Do you guys (and girls) think he just made an excuse to "run away" and I should text him to say "Hi, how are you? It seems like you disappeared?" Or I should just move on?

Yes, you should text him.

No, dont text him.

[blunttalker]

Don't, he probably found someone else, he was probably dating other girls at the same time, with tinder it's so easy to date more than 1. You need someone who appreciates you and even more after sex, 1 or 2 weeks is waay too much. You want someone who's crazy about you and chases you, not someone who you have to go after. If he was really interested, he would have texted you, you may think he didn't bc you didn't, but men aren't like that, men don't expect women to be always the one who initiates. Usually when a man wants a woman, he does his best to get her, he's not even doing anything. Move on, there will be always better guys.

[Cady_19]

This is tough. Two weeks is a long time. Honestly o would let it go. Maybe he's going through something maybe he's not interested. Or maybe he's like you and waiting for s text. If it bugs you I'd say go for it. If it doesn't work out then hey at least u tried.

[Asker]

That "trying" part is the only thing to why I am even thinking about it. Cause in life... if you dont even try then you can't succeed at anything, right?

[Cady_19]

Yeah honestly just message him. It's worth a shot. Maybe he is going through something right now. Hopefully it works out :)

[janbie_15]

Sad to say but since you guys met off Tinder, the chances that he was serious about anything other than sex is slim. If you met through friends that's a different story.

[Paris13]

Move on, hun. You have been Dumped by a Loser OnLine. xx

[jp612612]

You know, I voted that you shouldn't text him at this point as his disappearance is no accident. The guy clearly isn't interested and has moved on however... We're at an age where we should go for what we want and if you want to text him once, I say go for it. If he doesn't respond to that, then let him go forever.

[Asker]

Just one text was my plan, yes. Even though I know I am risking getting involved in potential excuses etc (which I honestly dont wanna). I just thought "what if he is doing the same thing to me? waiting for me to contact him?". I know its highly unlikely, but in the end I guess the only thing that matters is for me to know I did whatever was possible for me to do. And if he doesn't reply, well... at least I did my part. :) I just dont wanna be seen as desperate, because I am not. I just dislike playing games and I do know that people live complex lives and not everything is necessarily always the way it seems...

[jp612612]

Right, that's highly unlikely that it's just some sort of misunderstanding. And you know, I think you and I feel the exact way on this subject -- I too am worried that you'll get some excuses and you'll sort of feel obligated to give him the benefit of the doubt. But yeah, I think you know exactly the right thing to do here.

[Asker]

Yeah, "too old" to play this childish games. I would rather invest my energy in doing something else than getting caught up in his excuses. But the other part of my brains always gives the benefit of doubt to everyone (innocent till proven guilty mentality :D ). Blah... I think I`ll sleep on it for a while. :)

[urcal]

Congrats, you've been 'ghosted'. A guys favourite/signature break up move. Sorry to say, but he wants nothing to do with you. Keep swipin', girl.

[Asker]

Yeah, probably it`s true. The only thing that bugs me is "what if he is thinking the same?". Like in a way "something bad happened to me, why is she even not trying to ask how i am?". Or am I overanalyzing? :)

[urcal]

2 weeks is a little too long for a "slow-play" lol and do you really want to date a guy who will sulk for two weeks until he get what he wants?

[Asker]

Good point with the sulking. :)

[Anonymous]

I hate to tell you, but this guy is gone for good. Don't have sex with guys you don't know too well. This kind of scenario repeats itself over and over even when girls throw themselves into bed with guys they don't know.

[slynchice]

Exactly! If you go more than 3 dates without sex and the guy is still interested, chances are he will stick around for longer

[Anonymous]

no shouldn't, jus move on