The answer is obvious and I'm not sure why you're blatantly ignoring it. Maybe you just got dumped or something. There's currently a culture of males getting ridiculed or even downright ignored if they voice that they were sexually harassed/raped (one of the major reasons why the ratio of male victims to female victims is pretty one-sided), and I've seen several stories of it online. It's pretty sad. While there is hypersensitivity to female sexual harassment due to negative influence of third-wave feminism. Innocent males getting jailed due to false claims (I've never heard of a male managing to do this to female), females trying to cause massive shitstorms over a simple compliment (one example is Ashley Judd) etc. There's another example, but I can't find it at the moment. Nonetheless, Ashley was met with negativity from other females because even they knew her hypersensitivity was bullshit. This isn't to disparage the experiences of female victims, but, although some men are participating, some people within the campaign further this culture by sometimes making it come off as female-only by making several statements such as this: "If [all the women] who have been sexually harassed or assaulted wrote 'Me Too' as a status, we might give people a sense of the magnitude of the problem." That's obviously not good if you're well aware of this fact. All it takes is a little bit of rewording to eliminate (seemingly deliberate) bias that appears to be exhibited by several members of the campaign, and everything's fine. If you actually think it has to do with "men validating women's lives and experiences", something's wrong with your reading comprehension.
It's disgusting when campaigns like this get infiltrated by deceitful misandrists. It's an insult to real victims that need an outlet, both male and female <- (see what I did there? Easy. If doing that is a problem, you're sexist. Fortunately, I'm not sexist, so...).
Irrelevant, but: I've technically been sexually assaulted before based off how everyone else is defining it, but it wasn't really a big deal to me, so I'm not interested in hyping it up. Just making that clear.
I am a child sex abuse survivor. I think men also have some of the same issues too, even though we are more of a minority as victims in the sexual abuse and sexual assault cases.
I kind of agree with men being included. What is wrong with having some solidarity as humans rather than continuing to be divisive along gender lines?
Now I wouldn't go so far as to say #metoo is pointless without men being included. That is just asking for flames and is wrong to say.
I don't think men need to validate a woman's experience, but rather, men feel like they aren't being validated just because women consider their own experiences more valid than men's just because it happens to them more frequently, if that makes any sense.
Do you really think it is a lot of men? Do you not think women also not like to be the center of attention? Do you think maybe, just maybe, there could be some confirmation bias going on?
I have witnessed a nasty thing on Tumblr. Someone was saying they'd been raped and feel uncomfortable about rape jokes. A man in his forties told some graphic jokes about this survivor's asshole getting stretched out. The only people who were defending the survivor were young conservative women, including myself. It later turns out that the victim was a 14 year old boy. But the 40-something man did not know that. And that same man went on to say that male survivors get ignored
But that is just one man. Anyone can say anything on the internet and feel like there is this invisible wall they can hide behind like cowards. To some of these people, both men and women, things don't feel as real on the internet, they feel like they can get away with anything without a conscious.
It was just ONE man. If the internet has taught me anything, is that there will always be catfish, trolls, assholes, and creeps. I seriously hope you don't put all men under that umbrella.
Good point. And by default, I am polite to strangers until they give me reason not to be. But at the same time, I don't trust them until they give me reason to
Remember, us good men and women are out there. We make mistakes too. The difference is, we try to learn from ours and we care about doing the right thing.
Well I don't think he was saying "we have to validate this or it's not legit", they're saying: "this has nothing to do with us, it's not about us, it's about women, so I'm gonna go look at some shit I'm included in."
Feminists, y'all are too sensitive sometimes. Damn.
I mean in that specific situation it's probably something to do with how male victims of sexual assault/harassment are generally disregarded or mocked for telling anybody.
I don't see it that way myself. I see men try to join in and get refused as they're 'taking away/talking over' women's issues, yet when they're prompted to start their own campaigns or charities to help male victims, radfems and such often go to extreme lengths to get it shut down, leaving male victims feeling isolated and with nowhere else to go but to in turn again, join in with an originally female orientated movement.
@asker this is exactly why men stay quiet, because people like you don't take their experiences seriously. If a man speaks out, he's probably just doing it to belittle women right? It has nothing to do with being abused and traumatized by it... nice
Isn't disregarding men's stories as lies bad though? I thought I was to listen and believe when victims of sexual assault were telling me their stories...
I wouldn't base anything on this negative characterization of one person's opinion on one thing.
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
As another poster said in here, you will never achieve true equality when you constantly separate the issues both genders have to deal with.
Yes there are many many cases of idiots raping and assaulting women/girls and yes there has been decades/centuries of men telling women to shut up or suck it up and move on. Problems still exist today with all of this but despite this, things are improving slowly.
See there are many cases of males being assaulted by their partners, assaulted as children (like the whole thing with the priests, female teachers in a position of trust, etc.) and many men are "conditioned" into keeping their mouths shut, sucking it up and moving on because "that's what men do."
I have been sexually assaulted when i was about 5-6... By an older female at that. Yet this is the first time I ever publically stated this.
I have been cheated on by previous partners... Yet have never once cheated myself.
Despite all of this, I don't hold bitterness towards females as a whole, i have never raised my hands to anybody unless in self defence. As mentioned before, I never cheated on a partner nor will i ever.
I am this way because of the principles and self respect I hold for myself. I don't huge any group, religious, gender, race, sexual orientation, etc. But only judge individuals based on their own actions.
And I am not the only male who is like this... Yet time and time again, I am shoved into a group (usually by feminists) of pig headed males who rape, assault, treat others like crap and continually branded as some sort of evil gender who shouldn't be trusted around women or children despite my proven actions.
The bigger problem is what I can see my own son going through as he gets older. A son who I do my damn best to raise properly and to treat everyone with respect.
What will he be going through when he is older?
We already see what this division is doing. Many men get on the defensive and many men will ignore these kinds of groups who brand us all villains.
We have to constantly prove to the world that we are not dangerous despite the ones who give males a bad rap. And when you're constantly treated suspiciously... You eventually lose sympathy for those who always come out as the victim while finger wagging at you when you never did anything wrong.
And if you speak your mind and don't blindly follow the Extremism-Feminism crap, you're evil.
I treat others as I would wish to be treated and that should be the way for everyone.
The vast majority of men do not think this is pointless. There are def some assholes out there who do.
I think the point of contention is that, though as a person who has endured rape and sexual assault in my life I completely support this, it also stings a bit because this is yet another area in the dialogue about sexual assault where I am reminded that male rape victims are not a concern to anyone. Nothing like this would ever happen surrounding male victims because when it comes down to it people really only care about female victims.
Now, I'll say again, I 100% support this campaign. As well as every person who has had to endure sexual assault. I also am not going to hinge my support on whether this campaign includes men or not. It's just difficult sometime knowing that when it comes down to it my suffering is not as important as others simply because of my gender.
True, no one says it, in fact people don't talk about make victims very much at all. It's the extreme lack of resources, acknowledgement, and support for male victims shows where societies priorities are.
Women only get resources because our older sisters fought for them. They raised awareness. By all means, do the same for women. But this is not a matriarchy at all. Women do things for ourselves because no one else will. Men just want women to serve them
Who said anything about a matriarchy? And are you seriously claiming that all men are misogynists that only want women to serve them? What an incredibly insulting and completely unnecessary thing to say. You know, believe it or not, many men are actually good people who are in fact not misogynist assholes. But sure, by all means, judge me and all men by one of our worst minorities. It'll make those of us with shared issues easier for you to disregard.
You could say the same thing about women - or I guess since you quoted someone by the name of "radfem" you'd prefer the term "womyn" because the term woman contains "man". Perhaps you and the "womyn" you quoted are guilty of this for being annoyed that male victims would also say "me too", because then it wouldn't revolve around you. Whenever men talk about male victims there are always women who say "well what about women?", and claim that they have it worse, almost as though they want men to keep quiet and again only to focus on them.
Many of your comments reveal that you're a little misandric, not that you'll admit it.
You say that you don't have a problem with men joining and that your problem is that men sse it as pointless if it doesn't revolve around them - here you're ignoring what they're really saying. They aren't saying that something is pointless if it doesn't revolve around them, they're saying that it's wrong to allow one group to participate but to exclude another group, who experience the exact same thing, because of their gender. You'll probably agree with that "if it's done respectfully", as in "if they do it the way I expect them to do it". And then in another comment you said that many of them lie, presumably because they're men right? What would you say to a man who just disregarded most women's stories claiming that they must be lies? You'd call him a misogynist piece of shit. You're just as bad as much as you try to hide it and pretend otherwise.
I think there's something perverse about sexual assault only being a problem when it's affecting women. If you're not including men then what kind of world are you advocating for? You're advocating for inequality. Men are being ignored, neglected and demonized. Why do you consider men being acknowledged equally as self-centeredness? It's far from the first example of this. There's much more evidence to suggest that your question is better directed at women. But I'm not actually asking that question, I'm just asking not to be ignored or demonized.
I think it's pretty useless no matter what, it's just a twitter hashtag. But I think it sets a bad precedent when it's meant for women. I think the principles underlying it will be flawed.
I think it's also worth noting that people came up with a companion hashtag for me #Ididthat. Much more popular seems to be #Iwouldnteven for all the people like me who have nothing to do with hurting people and don't appreciate the demonization.
I don't think that it needs to revolve around me I just think that's sad that you're trying to talk about sexual assault and how prevalent it is and you are ostracizing 49% of the population it just doesn't make sense to me. men are not raped at the same percentage as women but they are raped they are molested and I think it's sad that you just exclude them from something that supposed to provide relief for sexual victims
It's one thing if it's used as somewhat of a calculator to show how much WeinwhateverJackhimselfoff was abusing his power, but the movement is now used as something much more ridicule.
"Look at all the abused women and how they are amazing to cope with it, now look at all the vile men, men are evil, men can't have been sexually abused, that's just women.
Allow me to add a bit in here : It's not that we believe that everything should revolve around us, and I don't defend how that guy may or may not have phrased his opinion, but the MeToo movement feels like yet another excuse to belittle men over the stupidity of a single one.
Just as FemFatale phrased : "All men believe that women should be weak because this one guy said it, now retweet my claim and let it be known that all men sucks."
So can men not be sexually harassed or assaulted? The issue the guy was probably making is that why only talk about the issue on one side? Why only talk about how it effects women instead if tackling the issue as a whole head on? Guys get molested, they can be made to feel uncomfortable, they can be sexually harassed and assaulted, they can be raped. But sure, if guys wanting to highlight that issue at the same time as women is somehow had then sure, you're in the right on this one
One guy says something stupid and that explains why ALL men are annoyed. I guess I missed the memo, because I don't feel annoyed about "metoo." I do get slightly annoyed when I see people make such gross generalizations and ALL men or ALL women.
I didn't think the #metoo tweet trend was necessarily pointless.
Some men =/= men in general
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Why do women think that men's victimhood isn't important and only women's issues are important? I can't believe you don't see the hypocrisy in your claim.
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Opinion Owner
+1 y
Also, anything that comes from a "radfem" is simply bullshit lies made to push anti-male hate speak.
"share" their experiences... getting them taken seriously is a different story. We aren't trying to belittle women's experiences, women just take any attempt of males to mention victimhood as some sort of attack or marginalization of women's issues.
Casey Jaye even states this herself in the red pill documentary, when males are talking about how males make up the majority of homeless, suicides, etc. She felt that they were minimizing women's issues, but she realized they weren't and she couldn't understand why pointing out actual male issues made her defensive. It's a female mindset that causes women to feel attacked because they aren't the center of attention.
OMG.. NO.. the red pill documentary was created by feminist Casey Jaye with the intent to shame and attack men's rights groups because she believed what you did and when she actually took the time to talk to them, she stopped being a feminist and realized that Men's rights groups were better than feminist. So feminist tried to do everything in their power to silence her.
The ONLY Red pill group that is what you say is the troll online community of reddit. They aren't actually part of men's rights groups.
Why do women think that everything has to revolve only around them?
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
"Why do men think that anything that doesn't revolve around them is pointless?"
The irony of this ^^ coming from a feminist is fucking rich.
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Opinion Owner
+1 y
@EmilyRubio I have read enough of your posts here at GAG that it's crystal clear you are everything that is wrong with feminism today. Seriously, any man who supports women's issues would still tell you to go fuck yourself. You really need to pick up a mirror.
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