Why is he pushing me away? Daily relationship impressions?

[jayrich5893]

I need guys oppinions only. My boyfriend is one of the sweetest giving people i have ever met, to everyone but me. He used to be so fucking wonderful to me and its begun to make me very depressed and irratable. I understand he is stressed about a lot but he is only acting negatively towards me.. and he has become extremely selfish about sharing space with me. He goes out and buys all kinds of stuff for himself and if I ask him to get me something a hassle same with trying to get him to spend time with me*that's like pulling teeth) he turns down bjs and its a chore to have sex or a privilege. I love cleaning and organization and cooking but if I feel like its not appreciated whats the point. Saying thank you doesn't mean anything if you have a follow comment that's negative. . I believe that everyday should be a new day to help and love eachother. When your in a relationship you should do everything to continue to improve your ways to positively impacting your partner. And 1rst impressions are not everything if you stop being that person that you met. But have no problems doing it for others. What am I supposed to do about someone who has become extremely callous and almost narcissistic.

[DejectionControlled]

He's become too comfortable with the relationship. I imagine you've been dating for more than 6 months to 2 years. This is when oxytocin levels drop down, and you lose that initial, exciting romance "best-person-in-the-world" vibe. If that is in fact how long you've been dating.

If not, I might question if he was cheating or not, given his lack of interest in sex with you. Either that, or he is feeling a lot of stress or something. Which would also explain his callous behavior. He's comfortable with you, so he feels comfortable expressing himself fully. But, with other people, he doesn't feel comfortable expressing himself fully.

I don't know. If I knew him, I could say more. But those would be my guesses.

Either way, I think what you need to do is to lay out some ground rules about how you are to be treated in the relationship, and to make it clear to him that if you aren't respected, then the relationship is over. Maybe that will shock him out of his narcissism, and he'll realize that he can't just take you for granted.

Part of being in a relationship is communicating that. Well, a huge part of a relationship is communicating. So, have you tried to let him know how all his self-absorbed behavior is making you feel?

[Jan_Classic]

Oh I hate the type of people who demand worshipping their ass. You should have serious talks and demand him to stop his egoistic behavior. In case he refuses you'd better move to your mum's place or previous place so the guy could worship his ass by himself. I totally agree that people need to change always to keep relationships fresh and the bed hot =D. Good luck to you!

[jayrich5893]

He really is super selfish like will get our roommate a polar pop but NOT me

[Jan_Classic]

Just try to talk first without quarrels or fightings.

[jayrich5893]

As long as it is benefits him its ok.

[Jan_Classic]

Tell him "bob, stop being a lazy dumbf.. ck, if you want your lady to worship your ass, make your lady a decent car, a fur coat and some awesome vacations at caribbeans.

[jayrich5893]

That's the thing. I dont care about any of those things. All I care about is making him happy and for him to kniw that someone will always be there for him. Im the ride or die chick that anyone with eyes can see.

[Jan_Classic]

Then don't expect people to appreciate you hehe. You either make yourself significant or people throw crap at you =D

[Electric_Dreams]

The fact that he's rejecting sex suggests depression to me though.

[jayrich5893]

I know he is depressed. Im empathetic as heck! But I don't know how to comfort him when he won't let me. Plus he always fine when everyone else is around.

[Electric_Dreams]

Another indicator of concealed, suppressed depression that he perhaps is in denial of, y'know that he's fine around other people. He's like Smokey Robinson's sad clown perhaps.

I don't have much relationship experience, but I consider myself a logical person. Logically I think this needs addressing, dealing with, so what I would advise to do would be to talk to him about it.. but it's difficult how to go about it without him perhaps getting angry and lashing out.. because essentially you'd be telling him he's depressed and he needs help. But it comes from a place of love where you're worried about him.

[AlphaGhost]

I think you are behaving like toooooooooo good and if you don't make yourself look appreciable to him, He will through crap at you and won't give you anything,
Just sit down with him and tell him, How do you feel?
If he don't change punish him with some time alone or leave him for 2 weeks and He will get his fucking shit back together.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I think you need to open up to him and tell him how you feel about things.
Whether they turn out good or bad , i believe he owes you a explanation
on why he's acting the way he is acting towards you. Don't be afraid
to tell him how you see things cause you deserve a answer on what's
going on with him.

[Jovan_the_joker]

Sounds to me he lost interest in you, try to go dark and talk less than usual, or he's just being comfortable with the relationship, it depends, how long has the relationship been going?

[jayrich5893]

Six months but that's not making me want to be the person I was. Im the girl next door type. Everyone around me sees that I would do anything for my friends and family but in a relationship that person is my number 1 priority. All I do is try to impress him and take care of his needs and its offensive to undermine me and belittle me in front of his friends but then when they're nice he's attentive

[Jovan_the_joker]

Then he's just taking you for granted, thinking that what he's doing now is okay, tell him straight that it's not right

[jayrich5893]

Oh, I have. Anything that is said about him that's negative he turns it around on me. I seriously feel like he coi let be cheating or more then likely gay. He super sexist and says gayer then gay shit. And he always makes me feel like im the hardest person to make happy. Food, cleaning supplies and share your space instead of making me feel like im occupying to much of all of those.

[Jovan_the_joker]

He probably is having a mental breakdown, give him space and cool off the negative part, as a guy I like a girl that is caring, but when a girl asks too much questions like what's wrong etc. Or you've changed, it's a huge turn off, just give him time, and meet up and talk, it's better than texting.

[Jovan_the_joker]

Or you could take him somewhere, a themepark, zoo, cinema, clubs, his actions speaks louder than words, if he checks girls out, then you'd know he's not into you, etc etc.

[jayrich5893]

Of course I changed. He thinks that because he said something with a nice sounding tone of voice that he isn't rude. complains about everything I do and then complains about me not doing anything. If i begin to organize anything he tells me to stop becaues he doesn't know where things are going and he can't find then but he can't ever find anything anyways and ends up asking me to help him find it for him. I ALWAYS stop anything and everything to assist him in anything he need. He demands respect from me but never gives it in return. I rarely ask him anything. I ask if he ok. Or if he needs help with anything. The main rule I have is to let me your leaving when you go somewhere Because you never know when the last goodbye could be. And when your out and have to go somewhere else let me know plans have changed.

[FemWorship]

true or not he's labeled you as
his anchor
reason for tough times
hurtle to success
scarecrow to other gal options

not to mention possibly bipolar

if he's going to heal from this mental state, you'll have to withdraw, move out and wait

[DrkPrince]

It might just be the time. There is a time when you need a person and you do a whole lot to get her. Once you know she is yours, they tend to lose that charm towards that person which brings such situations.

Try talking with him up front and discuss the matter in details. There are things that needs to be done from his end, not yours..

[romperstomper]

Just sit him down and explaine how he makes you feel and ask him if he's bothered about the relationship, but when u spend too much time under each others feet it can start to get that way always best to have a bit of spade from each other efery day even if its only for a hour or so

[stifmister]

Sit down with him and discuss about his family or something he likes... Understand his problem and force him to share his weight with you... Only then can ur relationship grow...

[Dr_Latex_McPeggin]

I would sit down and talk to him and let him know who you feel and just let him know you are there for him when he is ready. Patients will be your key...

[Maddy012]

Simply he takes you for granted. Try to leave him for sometime or either check him to see that if he really needs you or not. If he needs you anyway, go talk to him about things and if he doesn't, dont waste your time here.

[Anon-ymous1]

Hmm... How is sex? How often does it happen? When it does, who initiates it?

[jayrich5893]

Sex its out of this world! And super kinky. Not very often at all. I try to initiate all the time and he has denied me multiple times.

[Anon-ymous1]

Hmmm... if he doesn't want sex with you, something is off. He may not be into the idea of your relationship anymore. Guys always want sex in a healthy relationship. Always. If that isn't there, then he may be having second thoughts about being together, for whatever reason.

[chrisvolk]

Honey.. its done. Either he's a fool (and completely taking you for granted) or has a new love interest. I'd kicknhis ass to the kerb

[Krumpir]

Why do you sound so perfectto me, and he sounds like ungrateful depressed cunt?

[jayrich5893]

I am not perfect by any means. I definitely have my flaws and make mistakes.

[Krumpir]

But he sounds like an asshole...

[NanoAngel]

Bc its a troll

[NanoAngel]

Or she is hiding half part of the story

[jayrich5893]

Im not hiding anything. I said im not perfect. My bads can outway my goods. But you have to seriously push my buttons. I am a lover but im a bull. Pu ss me off and I lose respect for that person.

[Kopitah]

He turns down blow jobs?

Sorry, but that's just disturbing.

[rickybell1]

This is not the problembcoz after have a surtainvtimexin a relationship this situation come to solve really me

[unboblievable]

Maybe he's bored of you. Happens sometimes in relationships.

[phil27]

He's just being a dick

[Auctor]

What kind of picture is that?

[siddusajjan]

You don't go fast

[bonezrx7]

I don't know.