So starting at 15 and finally stopping at 26, I was cutter. I would do good for a while, then I would start back up again. I look at them now at 30 years old and I get disappointed at how I allowed depression to conquer me emotionally and mentally. Every now and then I get depressed and the thought will cross my mind, but I'mstronger now and able to focus my attention on more healthy outlets.
But I have always wondered if guys are turned off or grossed out by women with scars?
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+1 y
The legs in the picture are mine.
Are guys turned off by scars?
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Tbh, when I see a girl like that, I feel like I would have more compassion for her. I'd imagine a guy laying in bed and seeing those legs with a story to them, your legs possess the story of pain and your existence a story of conquest. Altho they aren't the most flawless legs ever, but if a guy really and truly appreciates you for who you are, I don't think I would be worried of a guy being turned off. Guys don't usually get turned off by girls that they love for their soul and spirit. The ones that get turned off are the ones that see girls as a piece of meat, and a trophy to show off. You don't need men like that, and they aren't relationship material. A man who you can open up your vulnerability to, and someone who understands you and loves you for all your pain and trials, is a man that will make you feel beautiful and wanted. I have lots of stretch marks on my legs and butt, and altho it wasn't caused by cutting, it was a sign of rapid growth that made me insecure for a long time... I was not comfortable with my boobs and butt that I developed during puberty, it sometimes made me get attention that I didn't want. I know it's in no way similar, but as females we need to learn to love our bodies so that men will know what it means to love us as well.
the physical aspect is nothing. but why you got them is a lot to take on if it’s something still being battled. you should love yourself before anyone else. i’m glad you’ve overcome your demons and found healthier outlets!
Not sure about other men, but certainly not me. My ex used to cut herself, and when she told me about her history, all I wanted to do and did was hug her. Even while I'm reading your post, my heart aches with empathy and sympathy for your pain. I don't know your story, but I want to tell you that your scars don't make you any less of a beautiful person. I don't know you, but I value your existence and so do other people in your life.
Stay strong, take care of yourself, and know that your scars are not ugly :)
Well I suffered depression too so I tend to date girls who have had these same issues. I've seen so many scars like yours in the legs and wrist. I honestly couldnt give a shit about them they are there and noone is perfect.
I'm proud of you for stopping I know how hard it is and let me just say that you have pretty skinny legs. I love skinny girls :) and I'm sure mst guys won't care about them unless they are like in denial and think we live in a perfect world where people have no issues
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Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
Girl, dont talk like a child. We are humans too. We do have scars and we do know that it's natural to have scars. Stop worrying bcoz everybody have scars at some point of threir lives and everyone who has scars over their body love their own body If i have a scar, it doesn't mean i'll start disliking my body. I would still love my body. So, i can't have problem with anybody's scar.
See, i dont know you would believe me or not, it's really hard to explain but i have get attracted towards the scars. yes they look attrative. Stop worrying that much. There are many characters that make a women beautiful, not just the body
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Opinion Owner
+1 y
I think the girls in the photo should wear some long clothes. That dress looks too short. its provocative.
It’s not a dress, it’s an oversized sleep shirt. It was pretty early on a Saturday morning. I pulled up the shirt to take the picture. The shirt actually falls below my knees 🙂
The scar I have on my leg from surgery sutures looks FAR WORSE than the image depicted above. What I'm trying to say is that scars, marks and other things on women and men are far more common than you would think. I personally think it's nearly impossible to go through the course of your life without aquiring a mark, injury, or scar in some way or another. It would be hard to find someone with absolutely flawless skin with no blemishes, scars, burns, brusing, or marks of any kind. Your scars shouldn't be a problem.
I think snowflake's could be turned off by some scars but that's a win for you, cause you don't want them either hopefully.. you have really attractive legs by the way and it's not that bad trust me, far from it, just don't do that any more, I mean the cutting
I know you asked guys but for me it'd not be a turn off, not a turn on but i believe they are part of who u are the things you went through the scars you carry make you the awesome person you are now and if the person loves the scars shouldn't be a turn off.
I’d say majority of people are turned off by it or uncomfortable about it in my experience. If it really bothers you you can get castor oil and apply it several times a day for a month or two and it’ll be gone, that’s how mine disappeared, you can’t even see it now. But that depends if you want them to be a reminder not to go back that way or if be rid of the sight altogether and not remember it at all.
Not in my experience. At least the right guy won’t. My boyfriend always says that scars tells a story, and I remember once he described it as “You start life as a blank canvas and then life paints you.” And I kinda live for that.
Also this feels really weird I usually don’t compliment people on their legs but you do have awesome legs. You look tall and tan, love it.
You are saying all the stuff that would sound sweet and cool if the scars had an origin story like that. But, they are not those kinds of scars. Scars do not turn guys off, but scars that point to mental illness and past suicidalness might.
Stop it with the "real man" bullshit. Whenever women WANT something, that's apparently what "a real man" does. That's egocentric, manipulative, and by most women's own standards, deeply sexist.
I could say "a real woman gives me blowjobs when I demand them" or "a real woman stays home and watches over the kids" or "a real woman keeps the house clean and does the dishes" or "a real woman likes whatever kind of man I AM". That's just bullshit.
I'm not turned off by them, but of course I dont like what lead to them in the first place... my girlfriend has a ton of scars on her arms, its been my goal to keep her feeling safe and happy to prevent any further cuts or attempts on taking her life. We all have a dark part in our past, some longer then others, but the important thing is to keep living, learning, and loving one another... regardless of the past
Definitely not a turn off. And although I stopped sooner and found it to be an unhealthy way of coping... It's a way of coping nonetheless. Someone who genuinely likes, loves, or is interested in you won't find these disgusting yet in my opinion they should find them to be a sign of strength due to the fact that cutting is a sign of suicidal thoughts. And you are strong enough to over come whatever it was you were dealing with. You're a beautiful person.
I'd rather have a girl with a scar than a girl with a tattoo. If it is ugly and grizzly and jagged, it might take getting used to. Surgery scars are very upsetting to me. But if it heals straight and cleanly it can look fine. The problem with your scars is that they came from suicidal thoughts. I looked at the picture before even fully reading your post, and I could tell they were self-harm. Your scars in particular would turn me off because a girl with a history of such mental anguish and instability is not something I am attracted to.
With THOSE legs? Honey, I'd date a chick if she had only ONE of those legs.
No. Seriously, it's strange, but thr furthest thing from a dealbreaker for me, I've seen worse. Plus you could say you were into hardcore BDSM, that would make those scars look like you were kinky. That's almost always a plus for guys.
@BrianMerritt Not necessarily, but she can say it was some whipping or something along the lines of that. It actually looks pretty much like the kind of scars whips cause, so I could believe that.
Falling down and getting a huge booboo that leaves a scar is fine. Someone gashed Tina Fey's face with a knife. She's still hot as hell, to me. But self-inflicted harm... scar or no scar, I would be really uncomfortable about being with someone that fragile. Our world is a tough one, and I have a harsh exterior most days. I couldn't be all tender and supportive to keep the knife out of your hands... No way.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Looking at the picture and knowing those are your legs, I wouldn't say it is that bad. They aren't overly noticeable. I have a nice few scars myself but that is just from be being stupid and doing dangerous/ risky stuff like extreme sports when I was younger. I don't think men care as much about the scars as much as how you got them. I mean it is clear from them that you were a cutter. That would be what would be the turn off. Especially if they don't really know you. It makes them question your mental health and how stable and well you will deal with situations. Mostly because in a way you have proof of your past pretty much there for everyone to see. Those kinds of issues are red flags for people and scare some away. So without knowing you, it could very well scare them away. Since they don't know if it is an older problem or something that you are still dealing with.
They dont care. A man who loves you will love you anyway. But stop being dumb and scarring you skin. I have a burn scar on my hand. Its not that big. Maybe 5 inches. But nobody had said a word. Even if they did. I dont care. Do the same thing girl. Be strong. Remember to not hurt yourself again.
I think that scar will mostly heal and maybe it won't even be visible as the time passes as you are very young still, just treat that area with some nice natural cream that feeds the skin deeper than an average cream, but avoid some chemical stuff
It should eventually fade away I am 90% certain lol ;) maybe not completely but it should happen... you were lucky it was your hand, gotta be careful with that stuff ;)
I'm not turned off by scars that are caused by normal activity like hiking or accidents. I am turned off by self-harm scars though. Despite my history of mental health issues, I think self-harm is ridiculous and pointless so I didn't engage in it. It doesn't make one better, it doesn't lead to anything good so therefore why do it?
it’s hard to understand if you’ve never been there. some pain feels so deep it feels like the only way to cover it up is by causing some physical pain that’s equally as deep.
there’s scientific research that proves the release of endorphins acts as a high so in the moment it doesn’t feel “pointless” or “ridiculous”, it feels like an escape.
again, i know it’s really hard to wrap your head around if you’ve never been there. also, i’m not saying this is the correct way to handle things; there are absolutely healthier ways to handle deep depression and traumas- just trying to give some insight.
@lunicorn You've misunderstood me then. I HAVE BEEN THERE. I came close to cutting while in a mental institution but I realized that it's stupid and pointless.
If you never cut yourself then you have never been there. Just because you came close doesn't mean you know what it is like to be in that situation. I am not saying your situation wasn't bad but people all cope in different ways
this breaks my heart because i know what its like to self harm. your scars are a testament to your strength, dont look at them as a weakness. you conquered that darkside of yourself and that takes absolute courage.
when i see scars like yours, i see someone who has endured the ultimate pain, someone who over come their inner demons.
Scars don't really turn guys off. For example I think Kyle Jenner has a large scar. Some guys might be turned off by the explanation. For example, I may not because I don't think I could live with myself if I helped someone start cutting again, and I would feel like I'd have to watch what I say, as I tend to think of people who cut as a little more fragile. -sorry.
I mean... It would make me ask you how you got them, but after the explanation I don't think it would bother me. I wouldn't be grossed out and I wouldn't be turned off unless you let them kill your confidence (e. g. you wouldn't wear thigh-highs because they made you self conscious). Just my off the cuff thoughts.
Ultimately, I think it would make me admire someone for overcoming and becoming stronger, which is attractive, but I'm assuming you wanted a guy's mostly physical take on them...
Scars are something that we can't really control. I'm sorry about you cutting, and I don't think a guy with a good heart would turn you down just because your skin healed over like normal. I have scars, but from accidents I have a lot. If you find the right guy, they'll love you, scars and all.
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