Are guys turned off by scars?

Question

So starting at 15 and finally stopping at 26, I was cutter. I would do good for a while, then I would start back up again. I look at them now at 30 years old and I get disappointed at how I allowed depression to conquer me emotionally and mentally. Every now and then I get depressed and the thought will cross my mind, but I'mstronger now and able to focus my attention on more healthy outlets.

But I have always wondered if guys are turned off or grossed out by women with scars?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Tbh, when I see a girl like that, I feel like I would have more compassion for her. I'd imagine a guy laying in bed and seeing those legs with a story to them, your legs possess the story of pain and your existence a story of conquest. Altho they aren't the most flawless legs ever, but if a guy really and truly appreciates you for who you are, I don't think I would be worried of a guy being turned off. Guys don't usually get turned off by girls that they love for their soul and spirit. The ones that get turned off are the ones that see girls as a piece of meat, and a trophy to show off. You don't need men like that, and they aren't relationship material.
A man who you can open up your vulnerability to, and someone who understands you and loves you for all your pain and trials, is a man that will make you feel beautiful and wanted.
I have lots of stretch marks on my legs and butt, and altho it wasn't caused by cutting, it was a sign of rapid growth that made me insecure for a long time... I was not comfortable with my boobs and butt that I developed during puberty, it sometimes made me get attention that I didn't want.
I know it's in no way similar, but as females we need to learn to love our bodies so that men will know what it means to love us as well.

mandi308 · Accepted Answer

the physical aspect is nothing. but why you got them is a lot to take on if it’s something still being battled. you should love yourself before anyone else.
i’m glad you’ve overcome your demons and found healthier outlets!

dr1fter · Accepted Answer

Not sure about other men, but certainly not me. My ex used to cut herself, and when she told me about her history, all I wanted to do and did was hug her. Even while I'm reading your post, my heart aches with empathy and sympathy for your pain. I don't know your story, but I want to tell you that your scars don't make you any less of a beautiful person. I don't know you, but I value your existence and so do other people in your life.

Stay strong, take care of yourself, and know that your scars are not ugly :)

skateranon123 · Accepted Answer

Well I suffered depression too so I tend to date girls who have had these same issues. I've seen so many scars like yours in the legs and wrist. I honestly couldnt give a shit about them they are there and noone is perfect.

I'm proud of you for stopping I know how hard it is and let me just say that you have pretty skinny legs. I love skinny girls :) and I'm sure mst guys won't care about them unless they are like in denial and think we live in a perfect world where people have no issues

Anonymous · Answer

Girl, dont talk like a child. We are humans too. We do have scars and we do know that it's natural to have scars.
Stop worrying bcoz everybody have scars at some point of threir lives and everyone who has scars over their body love their own body
If i have a scar, it doesn't mean i'll start disliking my body. I would still love my body. So, i can't have problem with anybody's scar.

See, i dont know you would believe me or not, it's really hard to explain but i have get attracted towards the scars. yes they look attrative.
Stop worrying that much. There are many characters that make a women beautiful, not just the body

MermaidMotel · Answer

The scar I have on my leg from surgery sutures looks FAR WORSE than the image depicted above. What I'm trying to say is that scars, marks and other things on women and men are far more common than you would think. I personally think it's nearly impossible to go through the course of your life without aquiring a mark, injury, or scar in some way or another. It would be hard to find someone with absolutely flawless skin with no blemishes, scars, burns, brusing, or marks of any kind. Your scars shouldn't be a problem.

howlyz · Answer

I think snowflake's could be turned off by some scars but that's a win for you, cause you don't want them either hopefully..
you have really attractive legs by the way and it's not that bad trust me, far from it, just don't do that any more, I mean the cutting

Shane_B · Answer

I have scars myself from making myself bleed, weather I used my hands and picked my scabs, or using sharp object like blades.

I was doing from a young age and still do it at times now...

I didn't understand why I did it to myself, but at 16, I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety, and have been on anti-depressant since...

But it wouldn't be a turn off, otherwise I'd be a hypocrite if I said it was a turn off...

But no one understands the way I feel other than myself...

lomimore · Answer

I know you asked guys but for me it'd not be a turn off, not a turn on but i believe they are part of who u are the things you went through the scars you carry make you the awesome person you are now and if the person loves the scars shouldn't be a turn off.

Rainie_ · Answer

I’d say majority of people are turned off by it or uncomfortable about it in my experience. If it really bothers you you can get castor oil and apply it several times a day for a month or two and it’ll be gone, that’s how mine disappeared, you can’t even see it now. But that depends if you want them to be a reminder not to go back that way or if be rid of the sight altogether and not remember it at all.

maiave · Answer

Not in my experience. At least the right guy won’t. My boyfriend always says that scars tells a story, and I remember once he described it as “You start life as a blank canvas and then life paints you.” And I kinda live for that.

Also this feels really weird I usually don’t compliment people on their legs but you do have awesome legs. You look tall and tan, love it.

lunicorn · Answer

those are tiger stripes.

any real man will look at you and know you’re a survivor.
i mean really, they tell a real survivors story better than any tattoo could.

each of those scars represents a time you fell and got back up.

the right man will love each of them because they are apart of you.
💛🌼

Grimoxford · Answer

I'm not turned off by them, but of course I dont like what lead to them in the first place... my girlfriend has a ton of scars on her arms, its been my goal to keep her feeling safe and happy to prevent any further cuts or attempts on taking her life. We all have a dark part in our past, some longer then others, but the important thing is to keep living, learning, and loving one another... regardless of the past

seden96 · Answer

Definitely not a turn off. And although I stopped sooner and found it to be an unhealthy way of coping... It's a way of coping nonetheless. Someone who genuinely likes, loves, or is interested in you won't find these disgusting yet in my opinion they should find them to be a sign of strength due to the fact that cutting is a sign of suicidal thoughts. And you are strong enough to over come whatever it was you were dealing with. You're a beautiful person.

BrianMerritt · Answer

I'd rather have a girl with a scar than a girl with a tattoo.
If it is ugly and grizzly and jagged, it might take getting used to. Surgery scars are very upsetting to me.
But if it heals straight and cleanly it can look fine.
The problem with your scars is that they came from suicidal thoughts. I looked at the picture before even fully reading your post, and I could tell they were self-harm. Your scars in particular would turn me off because a girl with a history of such mental anguish and instability is not something I am attracted to.

Benedek38 · Answer

With THOSE legs? Honey, I'd date a chick if she had only ONE of those legs.

No. Seriously, it's strange, but thr furthest thing from a dealbreaker for me, I've seen worse. Plus you could say you were into hardcore BDSM, that would make those scars look like you were kinky. That's almost always a plus for guys.

RetroAlpha · Answer

Falling down and getting a huge booboo that leaves a scar is fine. Someone gashed Tina Fey's face with a knife. She's still hot as hell, to me. But self-inflicted harm... scar or no scar, I would be really uncomfortable about being with someone that fragile. Our world is a tough one, and I have a harsh exterior most days. I couldn't be all tender and supportive to keep the knife out of your hands... No way.

Anonymous · Answer

Looking at the picture and knowing those are your legs, I wouldn't say it is that bad. They aren't overly noticeable. I have a nice few scars myself but that is just from be being stupid and doing dangerous/ risky stuff like extreme sports when I was younger. I don't think men care as much about the scars as much as how you got them. I mean it is clear from them that you were a cutter. That would be what would be the turn off. Especially if they don't really know you. It makes them question your mental health and how stable and well you will deal with situations. Mostly because in a way you have proof of your past pretty much there for everyone to see. Those kinds of issues are red flags for people and scare some away. So without knowing you, it could very well scare them away. Since they don't know if it is an older problem or something that you are still dealing with.

Pizza_lover159 · Answer

They dont care. A man who loves you will love you anyway. But stop being dumb and scarring you skin. I have a burn scar on my hand. Its not that big. Maybe 5 inches. But nobody had said a word. Even if they did. I dont care. Do the same thing girl. Be strong. Remember to not hurt yourself again.

InTimoreDei · Answer

I'm not turned off by scars that are caused by normal activity like hiking or accidents. I am turned off by self-harm scars though. Despite my history of mental health issues, I think self-harm is ridiculous and pointless so I didn't engage in it. It doesn't make one better, it doesn't lead to anything good so therefore why do it?

Death-of-rats · Answer

this breaks my heart because i know what its like to self harm. your scars are a testament to your strength, dont look at them as a weakness. you conquered that darkside of yourself and that takes absolute courage.

when i see scars like yours, i see someone who has endured the ultimate pain, someone who over come their inner demons.

nathanp97 · Answer

Scars don't really turn guys off. For example I think Kyle Jenner has a large scar.
Some guys might be turned off by the explanation. For example, I may not because I don't think I could live with myself if I helped someone start cutting again, and I would feel like I'd have to watch what I say, as I tend to think of people who cut as a little more fragile. -sorry.

ManFrom1982 · Answer

I mean... It would make me ask you how you got them, but after the explanation I don't think it would bother me. I wouldn't be grossed out and I wouldn't be turned off unless you let them kill your confidence (e. g. you wouldn't wear thigh-highs because they made you self conscious). Just my off the cuff thoughts.

Ultimately, I think it would make me admire someone for overcoming and becoming stronger, which is attractive, but I'm assuming you wanted a guy's mostly physical take on them...

SalamanderHotdogs · Answer

Scars are something that we can't really control. I'm sorry about you cutting, and I don't think a guy with a good heart would turn you down just because your skin healed over like normal. I have scars, but from accidents I have a lot. If you find the right guy, they'll love you, scars and all.

CauseNEffect · Answer

If those are your legs and your scars then no. Obviously I'd rather you didn't have them, or feel the need to create them, but I wouldn't see them as a dealbreaker at all.

Omaewamo · Answer

No, i am not turned off. I actually enjoy them...
What I see when I look at scars are strength and resilience, regardless of the nature of the scars. As long as the person doesn't still do it, I am totally cool with them having scars.

tøp1996 · Answer

I know I’m not a guy
But I just wanted to say
you have really nice legs
And you shouldn’t be ashamed about your scars, if shows how strong you were to conquer your inner self, so strong that you were able to stop and hang on to life

SoulfullWanderer · Answer

Every scar tells a story. Everyone has scars, whether they're visible to the human eye or not.
Don't listen to the haters that put you down. Even they have scars.
Wear yours proudly. They're the proof of all you've survived through ❤

Anonymous · Answer

I don’t personally see it as a turn off but in fact I admire that you went through hell and back and you didn’t let that stop you and you got stronger than ever because some people don’t get out of that and they end up ending their life’s sadly and I was one of them I wanted to chug a bottle of pills and just go but I’m here so I didn’t but i admire the work, effort and strength that person has to become a better person and to love themselves

General_Titipong · Answer

Nope there was a girl with a knife cut scar around her eyes that I really liked. a lot. I think scars give a stronger characters, I don't like being with a girl that doesn't stand out.

And anyways if you hadn't told me I'd think those are stretch marks or something. Seriously these are nothing.

Pejtu · Answer

this is not a turn off
my whole upper body is in strech marks , chest back shoulders , from belt upwards its too long story but my girlfriend says it does not matter to her at all , she even said it looks exciting/sexy because u never know what happend and it looks good on me even O_o
and i did not say her either why i got them so i guess it depends on the person

heyyyyy69 · Answer

Eh I'd be more concerned and hoped youd gotten help. I wouldn't be turned off by the scars I'd be be less inclined to date that person if theirs a lot of baggage. I was always helping people out and I'm just tired of helping people I need to worry about me more so that's my own personal thing

jimyee · Answer

Not at all, we've all got scars, wheter self inflicted or not. Anyone who deems that as a deal breaker isn't worth dating anyway.

Sarcastro · Answer

Not a turn off, but it's tough not to see that as an indication of an angsty and tumultuous past. It could make a guy admire that you're strong and of what you've gone through and survived.

Anonymous · Answer

I am not turned off by these scars but that's because I have a sister who used to cut. Not everyone has a sister who cuts and not everyone understands. She has two young boys and a loving husband now and she's in a much better place, very much like you! Stay strong!!!

unkqty · Answer

most guys aren't turned off by scars unless it's an indicator of a deeper issue. yes, cutting is one of them. recommend you get help for cutting and get your own affairs in order before looking for a long-term guy.

HuckleberryHound723 · Answer

The scars aren't a big deal, it's the stories behind them that define the person they are today.

Cryptconfessions · Answer

No. It's not a turn off. If you're a weird person like me, I will name them as battle scars and still be dating you (if I'm dating you). It's not a turn off unless that person is really. . . well.. squeamish

grega239 · Answer

dated some1 whos legs looked like that. i wouldn't say its a turn off. but it did feel like i was expected to carry her emotional weight along with my own

MarketData · Answer

The actual scars don't look too bad. The mental scars are the hardest to deal with.

Johnnie1000 · Answer

Scars would not bother me so much. Your problem would bother me. I wouldn't want to be the one who set that off again.

Mexicoman101 · Answer

I wouldn't date someone with a history of self harm again.

fearlessSinner · Answer

Honestly scars dont bother me. I got plenty from getting hurt myself. A man who cares and loves you will love you for all of you scars and all.

Ociffer · Answer

No. They are not a turn off. It's a sign that you had some serious issues and eventually got stronger and over came them. In fact, that's actually really attractive.
On a side note, you have beautiful legs. Don't be ashamed of them

Anonymous · Answer

Not in and of themselves. The reason behind the scars and who you are today would be the determining factor.

naantcha · Answer

your legs are sexy girl  anyway I don't think it's a turn off for guys but I also don't think they like scars

anuragk033 · Answer

No there are symbols of growing every one has scars, someone has on body someone has on soul

call_me_scar · Answer

My nickname is scar so I'm fine with them sorry 2 hear about the depression though hope you have people to talk to

MelaninDoll · Answer

my thighs look like this thin and scarred up, I fucking hate it! it's so embarrassing and ugly to me! I'm so ashamed, but I know I'm gonna relapse and think my scars are beautiful with blood running down my skin. never fails.

abou3atef · Answer

If someone really love for what you are then those scars will not matter anyway, i mean look for someone who loves you not just for your looks and you will not be worrying about those scars

Just-Chris · Answer

Not attractive but i think everyone has had a rough patch in his or her life, and i have been negatively impacted in finding a job because of my past. But i personally think that it builds character and if its in the past its for the better, so not a turn off per se

SGL69 · Answer

I'd date a girl with scars. As for your legs, well if you mind me saying, they're beautiful. Glad to hear you have overcome cutting.

SongBird3 · Answer

It’s not really so much about the scars it’s about what caused them

bigandbeautiful · Answer

You have no shame to show your scars. They are who you are and it's a story.

MiAmora · Answer

It's not a turn on. It was stupid and now you have to live with them all your life. But at least you're stronger now. Hope you won't cut anymore...

NineBreaker · Answer

I don't consider them a turnoff, especially if they look like the ones in the picture. It just makes me sad to know that they are the result of depression and self-harm.

ElvenMr · Answer

Good that you are over that now. Looks a bit like you are an amazon woman, who have got the scars in battle. Not a turnoff for me.

Burgerboy21 · Answer

Doesn't phase me, as long as the cutting in the past.

Massageman · Answer

Not the physical scars as much as the emotional scars from your previous actions. Glad you have been able to focus on positive things to do. Maybe get some sexy tights to act as camo if the guys are turned off?

kaskas19 · Answer

Typically yes. Looking at pieces of your skin that you mutilated isn't exactly a turn on.

MindTime · Answer

Nope. I would just want to try to ensure you never feel that bad again

Anonymous · Answer

Depends, if I would know that you did it to your self, it would be deal breaker for me as one of my relatives used it for attention seeking.
Unless it was coursed by accident then it is different.
Yes I realise it was you who did it but I would not need to know it, just pretend that you do not won't to be reminded of it as it makes you upset and leave it as mystery for a while.

PrincessPie · Answer

No, i honestly think unless extreme majority wouldn't care.

Shogun48 · Answer

I don't care about that, I'm just happy you got over doing it, well done!

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