Exactly. You said it better than I could
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yep it was only a few year ago the eye doctor discovered it when he went for his first pair of glasses. And apparently its more common in men. So you never know, doesn't mean they dont feel. And sometimes harsh childhoods can harden a heart. Best believe though that if that's the case and he does eventually love and trust you enough to lower his walls he'll eventually let out a whirlwind of emotions. I know because I was that guy. Eventually after decades of bottling up my emotions I finally let go and it was the most violent level of crying I ever heard/thought possible. When my dog died everything just came out. years and years of depression and anxiety just boiled over.
I’m sorry :(
everything in this life happens for a reason. Dont give up hope and your inner strength will multiply!
Have you ever watched King of Queens? There's an episode where Carrie wants Doug to show his emotional side. So when he does, she's immediately turned off lol. It's a comedy, but I think it's very true. I think a lot of women would feel that way totally if it happened.
I wouldn’t feel turned off if you truly love someone you wouldn’t feel turned off. My boyfriend almost cried one time when he was with me and instead i started crying because he was about to cry but he didn’t 😂
I know there's times where I feel like crying, but just physically can't. Or if anything, a tear might roll down lol. But even that's rare.
That's jus your nature. Not social conditioning... I was never "taught" not to cry... Neither would I care about whether society wants me to cry or not anyway, I'm a outcast... I don't care about fitting in... Jus feel no need to cry
It's jus how males are trust me. We're taught to not be emotional... And we are also unemotional... We're taught what were suppose to be
I cry in front of him all the time lol he teared up several times in front of me but he has never cried
@pink_and_inlove Aww well thats a good sign. Some people are less prone to crying, so its possible he's not an emotional person by nature? Anyways, I think its really sweet when guys get senstive so I wish you 2 the best of luck!
Tjank you :)
True and when I cry, it sucks because I don’t want to. My boyfriend is always laughing but I’ve never seen him cry before. Could it be that I’m more empathetic than he is?
This is both not true. Biology has confirmed men and women cry out about the same amount of tears during the lifetime... It was so funny to watch the reaserchers talk about GALLONS of tears that are calculated to be cried out during lifetime of avarage person.
What? How could that study be possibly done? Also, men might cry MORE but less. Meaning when men do cry, it’s worth 20 cries of women’sWomen cry more but less. In other words, their cries aren’t as tears-producing as men’s. One possible explanation. Men just aren’t as sensitive or emotional as women.There’s nothing wrong with being sensitive or emotional at all. Men & women are different
You said women cry more but lessThen you said men cry more but less.Khm.I think this is what you meant : that one of them cry more often but with bigger amount of tears, and the other cries less often but with larger amount of tears.This is very individualistic, I think this has nothing to do with gender.Well, tears, also appear as a response of the system to stress (release of anti stress hormones that fight back to too high levels of cortisol), as a reaction to pain (also physical, from baby age until adult age. Emotional, psychological, and mental pain (for example consequences of PTSD) are all processed by very same transmitters that process physical pain. In that sense emotional pain, to brain, is completely equal to physical pain, and knows no gender). And also, whole life is taken into account in the study, not only adulthood.
Yeah, I just said that…..Look, men cry, yesWomen, cry, of course.Women cry MORE for obvious reasons. I don’t think men cry less because they’re holding it in. I just think, they don’t cry as much as women. Men & women are different, so what? That’s perfectly fine.
No, study said that was a myth. There's only one thing. Women ALLOW THEMSELVES TO BE SEEN MORE OFTEN. it's more socially affordable for a girl to allow herself that. Men are also often taught it's not what men do, so they either feel shame to do it in public or they believe it would seem too vulnerable and maybe not let them relieve the pain but create new one - social judgment.Well you didn't say that exactly, you just repeated same sentence without specifising, but never mind, I got you. 👍
I dealt don’t think men are taught that. I was never taught that.I just think it is more NATURAL for women to cryRather than men.Evolutionary, men crying wasn’t a good look for strength and dominance, especially when other women looking at a crying men were turned off by him. Also, competitors finding him to be weak because he’s too emotional.Men weren’t taught this.Women weren’t eitherIt is what it is.
Well were. Lol it's so engraved in our subconscious and collective memory. What are you talking about? In more patriarchal societies that's even still a thing - until day of today.I saw with my own eyes - girl, younger than me, a mother, laughing out her 3 year old son in public to shame him because he cries, and he is a boy. And boys never cry. (I wouldn't do this to a child or anyone but I am maybe different and more empathetic than majority of people in my screwed up mentality).Also, I remember very emotional painful song by a male artist, from neighbouring country. He's Muslim and imam. But he's also singer. So he wrote this painful song to honour male pain that never can be processed with tears because then you're judged as you're male. So the song is called Rain prayer.
It goes : "I didn't cry from when I was 13. Men don't cry, mother then said. Men don't have right to tears. We lived back then in (name of city). God I plea you that now that I deal with this pain (apparently someone died to him), that you push rain cloud dresses above, to pour with rain heavily over this city. So that as I walk towards roofs of old part of downtown, that it seems it's rain, what is on my face, and that I can hide tears from a guest and from my enemy. I don't have right to show sadness because it's not bigger or more horrible than anyone else's sadness. But I plea you for rain at least, so that it hides me away and that my sadness belongs only to me. "Needless to say, it was extremely popular among men back then when it got reliesed. Just because you consider yourself person who never cries, doesn't mean avarage human is like that. https://youtu.be/wUPm6xDjQZMTry to observe the video and song. Lyrics are far more poetical and more hurt the soul of who listens, than what I described, but I think atmosphere that music creates will transmit what I missed in translation. I always feel like crying myself just listening to this song and I even don't know this kind of internal pain of restriction that he describes. Simply song is very very heavy and deep and human is empathetic so I understand.
(edit : this has nothing with Muslim culture. The country is Bosnia, where also chatolic and orthodox Christian live. Same type of theme, song and lyrics I know in Russian written by Russian male artist. He expressed pain in form of painful poetical lyrics and opera type of high pitched screaming. He's also very praised for that song there and in China. So that much about your knowledge of anthropology and our "history". Which is still true in some parts of the world, believe it or not. )
That is great to hear. It just takes time to show tears.
Don't be... just my two cents
Yeah I don’t like to either but sometimes it just happens
But how do you know it's a consequence of society and social conditioning, rather than jus the natural psychology of a male?What proof do you have?I'm pretty sure were jus this way by nature
We’ve been dating for almost two years now he teared up a bit once or twice but i haven’t seen him cry
By the way I never had a dad... So your wrong about thinking it's "conditioned" for men to act tough... No it's jus in a nature... We would be this way if we never had any parents at all.. it's jus in our DNA and the nature of being male... It's cos we have higher testosterone and think with our brains instead of our heart
Sorry about the aggressiveness of my comment... I've jus been seeing a lot of this about wanting males to cry n it makes me feel kinda like masculinity is under attack
I want to be tough too in that manner
I don’t want to see him cry i was just wondering about male psychology
I think the biggest mistake that I see people make on here is always assuming the worst without knowing someone
Men have more testosterone which means less emotional more logic mind. With today's world in my opinion men should use aromtase inhibitors diet is full of estrogen and the environment is not on our side soap shampoo etc
I watch too many kdramas I guess
I guess I'm a little weird bc I also find it difficult to cry even if I want to. I feel like I have to force it
@Cherry234 it’s not weird that people can’t cry. Everyone’s got different emotions. Some express it by crying while some don’t express it by crying.
@Cherry234 Same. I saw a video the other day of a 9yr old girl who dived Infront of a car to save two infant girl but she died in the process of saving them... I forced myself to drop tears jus because I thought I should.. even tho I didn't really feel like it at all... Is that gay as fuck? Lol. Maybe I should only let tears come out if they want to (never). Instead of forcing them lol
@Qestyinsanity No that's not gay lol. I'm sure you felt very sad about her death. But it's difficult to force tears. Both of my grandmothers passed away and I was sad about their deaths but I didn't cry
You're both thirsty, she said basically the same thing I did but you only reply to her 😂
Thanks for like!
My dad said men who cry shows weakness. Guys have to be strong.
@EssenceOfLight or alcohol
Update: No, but it's portrait enough in movies and such that kids pick it up anyway.
Though, he didn't cry when you guys had sex the first time? Because I would have!! ... But maybe that's just because I'm a virgin.
Don’t you think u put a little too much weight on sex? I mean I’ve seen your posts and it’s my honest opinion that you put it a little out of reach. Ofc it’s special but I don't know, just my 2 cents
@Assi2k. What do you mean by "out of reach"?
@Jamie05rhs like you’ve put it too high on a pedestal
@Assi2k. I still don't understand. Can you elaborate?