Why men shame women for getting old?

[Anonymous]

I am Young now but I don't want to date now. I want to date later in my lat 20s or early 30s but men's have problem with it according to them. anyone don't find old woman attractive. I should focus on dating rather than on myself.

[HighValue]

Women are still physically attractive as they get older. It is more than good men don't want someone that has slept around or had kids from other guys, which is much more likely the older she is. They also want someone that is likely to still have healthy kids, and regardless if she wants to admit it or not, when she is older, biologically she will have a greatly reduced chance of having healthy kids.

If you think of it this way, date for 1 year, live together for 1 year, and then get her pregnant so 1 more year before the first kid, that makes the process take 3 years minimum to have a first child with her. then she needs a year off to fully recover so it won't negatively affect her health before trying to get pregnant again. So after 5 years they can have 2 kids, and after 7 years together they can have 3 kids.
That means if she was 30 when they started dating, she would be 37 to finally have their 3rd kid. So realistically, if someone wants 3 kids, the woman needs to be 28 or younger when they start dating, and if they only want 2 kids, she could be 30 when they start dating.

There are significantly more kids with learning disabilities now and a big contributor to that is women having kids when they are older instead of younger. Another major contributing factor is they use drugs and/or alcohol, which harms their eggs, even if she quits doing it for years before getting pregnant, that doesn't matter because she already had her eggs and the damage was done.

I hope that explains things for you.

[Vegasrunner]

Dont know about shaming but women do loss their value as they age, while men tend to gain value as they age. It's a weird dynamic an in my opinion part of the reason you see so many older men w/ younger women. Reality is outside of their appearance women don't really have much value to men so as they get older and their looks start to fade they become less desirable. If a guy works on building up himself for x -amount of years, he wants to cash in w/ a newer model vs a used one. Most women understand this which is why they try to pressure men into relationships when they're (the women) young.

[Asker]

I disagree with men gaining value as they age in dating market. Most women I know hate old mens and average age gap is from 1 to 3 year in most countries. In my opinion women like guys around their age

[Vegasrunner]

A mans value is in what he can provide. A man in his 20's typically has not had an opportunity to build a financial empire and has less overall value then a man in his 40's 50's etc. I can't speak for "the women you know" but what all women want in their lives are things like Homes, vacation homes multiple cars, retirement funds, stocks, 529 plans, for their kids etc. Men who can provide those things have more value to more women and in society. It's not much of a debatable point as society is much more familiar w/ seeing older men w/ younger women and in nearly every case these older men are wealthy. As for the shaming part in my opinion men aren't shaming "women" for being old they are simply transitioning to the next crop of younger women and women take the fact that they are being ignored for the first time as shame.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't ask guys on this forum for opinions, or use them as an example, as most of them seem to be Trumpsters, incels, creeps and closeted pedos, or get discouraged by what they say. These guys sound like they haven't gotten out of the 1950's where the saying was "Three (kids) before 30". Oof, their whole mindset bothers me.

Actually 30+ is the most common age group among women to have kids in the U. S and generally in the Western world. I know lots of women over 30 and 40 who have had kids and I turned out to be alright. There used to be a belief that fertility suddenly decreases after 35, but that has since been proven wrong. Fertility slowly but steadily declines throughout a woman's life until menopause.

Now why don’t we talk about how sperm degrades and has more errors as men get older? Sperm banks don’t accept donations from men over 29 - there’s a good reason why. Sperm quality vastly degrades past a man’s late 20s, leading to birth defects and an increase in the rate of autistic offspring or mental disorders such as schizophrenia

[Slithers]

You should just focus on yourself regardless and don't let whether a man will like you decide your future. If you focus on yourself you will attract a better man, and a lot of times it happens when you aren't looking for it.

Women are great in general, whatever age. It's a cliche that a older guy will date a younger girl, but it's not the rule. Generally guys want a girl younger than them, but it doesn't need to be significantly younger. If a girl is too young for them, they can't keep up in conversation.

[LZPanzer]

I think you mostly hear men complain about women in their mid 30s because of a convergence of events.

Event 1. Men begin to leave their party experimentation /party phase and start to settle down.
Event 2 men start to reach a stable point in there careers.
Event 3. Men begin to discover there value and desirability.
Event 4 women have already hit all the above milestones and have been settling down for several years decreasing the ratio of available women with desirable traits.
Event 5 some biological clock goes off that reminds women they have a limited time to fulfill their biological imperitive. And desperation begins to set in.

Please note these are generalizations based on observation and do not apply at the individual level. Each person is unique and their individual experience, development and personality may differ from the mean.

[NamerOfStars]

Telling someone that they've become less attractive as they've aged isn't "shaming" them; it's simply acknowledging the biological realities that govern humans: as your reproductive viability falls, your reproductive value in a pair-bond scenario falls as well. It's very reductionist and animalistic, yes, but it's only a matter of shame if you see yourself as having no other value.

[RichSD]

You don't want to hear this, but yes, you had better make good use of your 20s because even in your 30s a LOT of guys will have no interest, especially if they hope to have kids someday. Women's fertility goes down very quickly after their 20s, it's not just appearances.

[Asker]

My aunt had a daughter at 46. many women in my family had kid's in their 40s

[Cgffgfgggffgggf]

You sound very uneducated. The same goes for men. Sperm banks don’t accept donations from men over 29 - there’s a good reason why. Sperm quality vastly degrades past a man’s late 20s, leading to birth defects and an increase in the rate of autistic offspring or mental disorders such as schizophrenia

[RichSD]

@Cgffgfgggffgggf Fertility decreases with everyone due to age, that's obvious, but to pretend men and women have the same reproduction window is to fool yourself.

[Cgffgfgggffgggf]

You sound uneducated and ill-informed, as if you haven't left the '50s, but if you think so I won't argue with you. Whatever helps you sleep at night.

[Browneye57]

It's not about 'shame', it's about attraction. A woman's youth and beauty are her greatest assets. Beyond thirty they now have to compete with much younger and prettier women in the dating pool. After forty it's nearly impossible to find a mate, for a LOT of reasons.
Don't squander your youth and beauty. Find a great guy and develop a meaningful relationship. In fact, find many, so you'll have the best of the best to choose from. Don't wait till you're wrinkly and saggy. Seriously.

[Anonymous]

Women can date any age they want - but your OPTIONS will decrease rapidly.

You are young now, you're in your prime. You can attract a certain type of man, and a certain amount of them.

But when you're 30, there will be less available men, and lower quality men.

By the time you're 40, there will be ever fewer.

Far too many women hit 35 and start trying to date as if they were 21. Those women get mocked, because their expectations are insane.

[Anonymous]

That’s not “shaming”. That’s just being old, older women are generally less attractive. That’s all. If you date at that age, you’re going to find fewer people interested. And “working on yourself” doesn’t do anything to fix that.

Like, what do you think “working on yourself” is going to get you? Why do you think it’s important?

[boggboss]

Some men do others don't as with anything age plays a factor in dating the older we get the harder it gets

[Asker]

So men don't want to date women as old as them? Because usually old men say it

[boggboss]

Many older guys date younger women yes ofc not all but many do

[Asker]

Most younger women I know date guys around their age. Average age gap is 2 year so are they actually doing it? or just insulting women's?

[boggboss]

I have seen many relationships where 1 partner is drastically older then the other so yes it definitely does happen

[Asker]

According to statistics average age gap is 2 year so? and I know many women's all of them are with guys around their age and seem like that they hate old men's and think that they're creepy

[boggboss]

Thats fair enough what u have to realise is that acrage don't apply to everyone lol it applies to the people that where in that study again I have known my fair share of people with a big age gap I never said all men not even most just many that are or have been in relationships with younger women

[Asker]

It was about average national marriage age gap so it apply to all married couples

[boggboss]

Lol yet more people are unmarried then married lol so that's only a small part of the population

[Asker]

So married people can't represent average age gap in relationship? So you think that most women like old men wow my experience was completely different almost all young woman I know hate old mens

[boggboss]

Where did I state that and yes the marriage age gap dont represent the avrage relationship gap because the diffenrce in number between marriage and relationship is vast again I at not point stated most or all women want a older guy I just stated that I have seen many people irl and online that have had a partner with 10 plus years ago difference

[Asker]

What do you is average gap than?

[boggboss]

For relationships would differ from country to country with cultures being differnt in the UK maybe within 5 years

[Asker]

At least for married couples it is 1.8 in Uk. Maybe your circle

[boggboss]

Again using marriage as your evidence baises dont mean much when statistics show more people are in relationships outside of marriage then in marriage and I wouldn't say its my circle as I'm not using my friend or family group as my evidence but people I know and work colleague in which I have worked in a few big business

[boggboss]

Since 2017 marriages are down and divorce rates are still rising which wpuld show why using marriage statistics to reflect relationships date is a bad idea

[boggboss]

Ah also let me be clear I'm not only saying I have know men that are older but also women that have younger male partners I currently work in a school and most partners are about 5-6 years differnt with some being closer and a few being much further apart

[JHNS98]

Because of pedophilic beauty standards. You know, long hair, no body hair, no wrinkles, the whole lot...

[es20490446e]

Cause you are implicitly saying you don't really value the other gender. You are simply using them for your own goals whenever pleases you.

[dudeinohio]

Most men are interested in women closer to their own age... they can relate better..."old" is relative.

[Recurrence]

I like older women, I wouldn’t worry about what other people think

[Anonymous]

It is according to biology not men.

Stop listening to Feminazis, they have their own agenda and it is not for your best interests...

[Anonymous]

You should take care of yourself more and date someone. I am ready to get to know each other

[LegendaryIcon]

I didn't know we did

Why do women shame men for having small members?

[ChrisMaster69]

Erm most men don’t, everyone gets older.

[Jaysolo66]

Dating later in life has been WAY more fun.

[kareka]

After 35 less chances to get kids

[Asker]

My aunt had a daughter at 46

[kareka]

I didn't say must lol

[RichSD]

At 46 the chances of getting pregnant are almost zero, even though there are some exceptions (like your aunt.) Even if she could conceive, the chances of birth defects are HUGE by that time. I don't think most men would want to risk it.

[Asker]

@RichSD her daughter is very healthy. Actually in my family many women were able to give birth to healthy kids even in their 40s. so hard to believe

[kareka]

Tbh i fuck this 45 friend's mom cuz she never get pregnant 🌚

[Asker]

Maybe my family is just more fertile.

[kareka]

Maybe..
But trust me i choose milfs for this reason hahaha

[RichSD]

Your family may have exceptional genes and good luck, but that is no guarantee you'll have the same luck when you're 46. It's a big risk, and it's fine if you prefer to take it, but I know lots of 30-something women and few of them are dating anyone near their age. And of those that are, the guy has kids of his own already. Food for thought.

[Asker]

Sexualizing women is bad

[RichSD]

Everyone sexualizes their sexual partner. That's kind of the point. You might perceive as shame what is really just men being realistic. It's not fair that men and women have different biological clocks, but that's the world we live in.

[Whytepowerhanma]

You can do both but whatever

[Hangry06]

The fertility thingy