What do I do if I started ignoring a work bully totally and now he doesn't say a word to me but I feel awkward and uncomfortable with the silence?

[Anonymous]

I am glad I dont have to be verbally or mentally assaulted though. Like he would say things to get reactions non stop for over a year. I am a very quiet person but i would remain nice. Lately i just had enough.

[noamazia]

generally, if you don't have to talk to him, then just leave it as is. any awkwardness is his fault, and that is also what you need to think to yourself. you just do you and dont give a fuck about him.

now, if there is some reason you need to interact with him or you can't ignore the feeling of awkwardness, then i would suggest talking with him very seriously and straight to the point. "you used to say mean/provocative/whatever things to me and i didn't like it so i started ignoring you, now we don't speak at all. i prefer we have a normal friendly work relationship, so are we going to have nice conversations or keep being strangers?"
most probably he would say okay, or make an excuse like "it was all just humor" or "that's how interact with people". then answer "well, i don't care what you say to others, i don't like it, so again, will you have normal conversations with me or shall we go back to ignoring each other?"

[Asker]

Thanks this is something to keep in mind to say if it comes up

[Iron_Man]

It’s better off this way until he gets his shit together

[Asker]

Haha, thats funny! Thanks

[Iron_Man]

You’re very welcome

[honeynut-scenarios]

Change your mindset. If there’s absolutely nothing else you can do about separating yourself from them (assuming you’ve spoken to your boss/ considered another department) without having to leave your company, the best thing you can do is find peace in the silence. It takes SO MUCH energy hating someone. Despite what they’ve done, or said to you, do your best not to let it bother you. Try to like them, or tolerate them, and your work life won’t be so miserable.

[Asker]

Do you mean like or tolerate them while also maintaining the silence?

[honeynut-scenarios]

You don’t have to like them, but don’t be annoyed so much by their actions, or presence. I work with a girl who irritated me so much, my blood pressure would go up just by looking at her. She made me hate my job, and I let her. Even without speaking, she bothered me. So I became friendly, and I found a way to calmly address her behaviors that bothered me. She still slacks off every now and then, but I turned my frustrations into jokes so I’m able to call her out when she’s not being helpful. Work has been a better place ever since.

[Asker]

Ahh, thats awesome. I know what you mean that it takes a lot of energy to hate someone and also what its like to have my body reaxlct so strongly to just the persons presence. I guess the hate sort of subsided and now its just awkward. But yeah i can try to have your mindset and hopefully not take it all too serious. Thanks my dear.