Men don't bond as quickly as women. What does it take for men to bond?

[UpdateGloomyNights_]

[MrOracle]

Men bond MORE quickly than women, actually.

Your confusion comes from the fact that you're mistaking SEXUAL interest for RELATIONSHIP or ROMANTIC interest - but for men, those are two very separate things.

When a man meets and has some interaction with a woman, he knows almost immediately (it could easily be within 30 minutes) if he has romantic feelings for her or not - and I'm very specifically talking about ROMANTIC feelings. Men usually know these things really fast. BUT... men tend to only have these feelings for a small number of women (JUST as women tend to only have these feelings for a small number of men).

BUT... men have SEXUAL interest in a much, much larger number of women, and when they're single, they'll happily pursue a lot of women that they are fully aware that they only have sexual interest in. And a lot of women don't understand the difference, or if they do, they simply assume that if the guy is pursuing her, that she falls into the "relationship" group rather than the "sex only" group for him - when she's 10-20 times more likely to be in the "sex only" group.

When this happens, the woman will think "boy, he's taking a long time to get serious with me" - not understanding that he's NEVER going to get serious with her, because she was never in his "relationship" category in the first place. With men, women cannot EARN their way into the relationship category, they can only earn their way OUT of it. Rather, he puts the girl IN the relationship group right from the start, or he NEVER WILL - if she's not in that group from the very start, she's never getting in with that guy.

Women don't want to hear that, though, because they know full well that the vast majority of the guys they pursue (the top 10% guys, who are nearly all "bad boys") don't consider her "relationship material" from Day 1, and so she convinces herself that she's going to change him somehow - she's going to "fix" him and he's going to give her a relationship if she just waits long enough and just badgers him enough. I'm not sure if this has ever worked, but even if it has once or twice, the failure rate is utterly abysmal at well over 99.9% failures.

What does it take for men to put a woman in that "relationship category"? She has to ALREADY BE "relationship material" and/or "wife material." What does THAT mean? It means: fit, feminine, friendly, cooperative, submissive, moral, low body count, and YOUNG. Why young? Because younger women are, on average, much less combative, set in their ways, jaded, have lower body counts, and are closer to the beginning of their fertility window. The more a woman has been single, slept around, or focused on her career, the more jaded and masculine she is going to be, and the less cooperative she's going to be, and men are increasingly uninterested in getting involved with those women - they've seen what it did to their fathers, uncles, and grandfathers.

Most women today, when asked what they bring to a relationship, offer her resume: her education, diplomas, career, and income. Men hear that, and they translate this to: "I wasn't interested in a relationship or a family when I was best able to have that - I've spent my prime relationship years battling things out in the world and becoming more masculine, jaded, and probably in debt." This not only doesn't score you points, it deducts points, because it means she went AGAINST all the things a man wants a woman for. Most women today can't talk about how they are fit, feminine, friendly, cooperative, submissive, and moral, so they don't get placed in the "relationship" category by most men - especially the men they want.

[DarkWinterNights]

Men with women or men with other men? I didn’t have issues with girls I knew back in high-school, but that was over a decade ago. These days it would probably be pretty tough. I primarily enjoy male hobbies and interests and you can’t joke around with women the same way you can with other guys.

[WhitneySnow]

Sports. Whereas girls are more likely to bond over a shared sense of empathy and maybe common interests.

[Fireguy17]

A lot of that goes back to how we were raised.
Not using it as an excuse, but usually guys are/were raised differently than girls, at least it was that way 100 years ago when I was a kid.
We can go a year without seeing someone and when we do we carry on like it was yesterday when we saw that person.
Women tend to be different and need to talk often.

[OlderAndWiser]

"Men don't bond as quickly as women." Is that what you really mean, or should you have said, "I get attached to guys quicker than they get attached to me? What can I do to get guys to become more attached to me?"

[UpdateGloomyNights_]

All of them

[OlderAndWiser]

Maybe you are targeting the wrong kind of guys as potential partners. How do you meet guys?

[Telekinetic-Potato]

I feel like for women, it just takes familiarity to get close to someone. But for men it requires you prove yourself in some way to be who you present yourself to be. And that takes time.

[Guy13]

Men may never bond in a way that a woman wants as women are emotionally driven. Read Ephesians 5 and it will tell you what and how for couple to bond.

[VLAD76]

Sellotape or a silicon gun? Is this a question for the DIY group?

[Honesttguy]

Trust takes time to build so i dont know what u mean?

[Anonymous]

Men are literal simps. WTF are you talking about.

It's just the top 20% don't want you. Because he has 9/out 10 women

[RandomGuy1030]

A mission or goal. If you really want to bond with a man it will take having a child

[Anonymous]

For me close snuggles helps

[jasco]

Time, Patience and care

[KrakenAttackin]

We used to but women have become too dangerous.

[Creampiekarl420]

Having common interest

[Anonymous]

Being genuine. Being sincere.

[Anonymous]

Superglue!

[BeachLuvR97]

Physical affection.