I said I want for him to feel safe with me , he said: I’m not sure that’s possible and I don’t know when that’s gonna be back to normal…Why?

[Deimy]

[DoctorSex]

From your limited context I can only presume a few things about you and I'm almost certainly going to be in part or wholly wrong but its the best I can do with what you've offered.

You seem controling. I gathered this from what you choose to leave out. You are only giving us what you want us to see and so the answer anyone can give with wholly or in part be wrong, that way you can dismiss the advice because "well they don't know our relationship".

The second indication that you're controlling is what you told him, "you want him to feel safe with you", is that an order madam?

You don't tell someone to feel safe around you, you just behave in ways that make them feel safe.

So all in all, you're using a lot of masculine energy and if he's a confident male, he will resent that type of approach from his counterpart.

Kind regards,

[Carolus]

Because he’s not okay with this relationship and somehow decided on quitting. Some like, once liquid is spilled can’t be recovered.

[Deimy]

I thought that maybe does not want to be with me anymore but when I wrote him a goodbey message he started to explain himself. After this message he also said that we will talk later again

[CallmeTheKnight]

Sounds like you had hurt him when he was vulnerable to you. Whatever this is, your said more about you and how you feel about him than your words.
And no, arguments push people away and are not good for expressing yourself.

[20yearsolder]

Evidently something happened for him not to feel safe with you

[Deimy]

He used to think I did not love him but I did and that I am always want to argue... but I love him and he even said that I was pushing him away when he truly loved me and it's still hurting him but I just don't know how to accept love, I was never loved by my mother and before I was abused by other guys.

[loveslongnails]

Safe from what? Are you diseased? Did you beat on him? Did you cheat on him?
What's the story?

[Deimy]

He thinks that I always make conflicts

[loveslongnails]

Well, is he correct? Do you? Are you a combative person?

[Deimy]

I am impulsive and he is very sensitive, run away from conflicts or not comfortable situations...

[loveslongnails]

Impulsive and combatant are two very different things. You can be either or both. Are you combatant? Do you usually argue or fight if you don't get your way, or in general?

[Deimy]

Yes I do that but I also have AdHd and he did not know it before

[loveslongnails]

Again, a short attention span doesn't make you a combative person. That's a different issue, and it's not a "cause" for you being argumentative or difficult. It sounds to me like he's had enough of that behavior and doesn't really want to go back to it with you.

[Deimy]

He said that the bigger problem was that he got hurted by me cause " I did not love him" and " pushed him away" . It is not true, I shew him that I love him

[loveslongnails]

He got that idea or impression from something, or some specific things. Maybe you don't speak the same "language" when it comes to love. If you do love him, talk to him about it and find out where the misinterpretations are.

[Deimy]

Yes I talked with him, I asked if he does not love me anymore , he said" at this point I need peace" we even laughed a bit about our zodiac signs, I wrote him a very sensitive message expressing how I loved him and how I love him

[loveslongnails]

Doesn't sound like a resolution unless he's saying "I don't want to date you anymore whether you love me or not"?

[Deimy]

What do you mean? He did not leave me?

[loveslongnails]

I thought he did because he didn't believe there would be any peace with you. Guess I misunderstood.

[Deimy]

Bur he said he want to talk with me and he is talking with me

[loveslongnails]

That's good then. Sounds like you need to get your temper under control and learn to talk. That will probably help him deal with little conflicts and not run away.

[Anonymous]

That's something you have to ask him. No idea what has happened with him.

[Deimy]

He used to think I did not love him but I did and that I am always want to argue... but I love him and he even said that I was pushing him away when he truly loved me and it's still hurting him but I just don't know how to accept love, I was never loved by my mother and before I was abused by other guys.

[Anonymous]

Need more to go on. What's you're history. Once you've seen behind the curtain of OZ there's no going back.

[Anonymous]

There is literally no way anyone can help you with this question without the background.