Is this normal or a bit much, should I trust him?

[Anonymous]

Ok I just met this guy and we’ve been talking for a couple months. I like him, we seem to have good chemistry. Long story short we talk a lot on Snapchat. Before talking to this guy I didn’t use Snapchat often in fact I don’t care for it and only downloaded it like my freshman year of high school because of some friends. So not surprisingly I have a low snap score like under a thousand. This guy I’ve been talking to does use snap a lot. He’s told me he uses it to talk to friends and some family members etc. (one he hasn’t given me any reason to not believe that and two we technically don’t have a relationship or exclusive relationship anyway so it’s not like it’s my business but this is all info he shared voluntarily) now I feel like I can trust this guy but one thing has been in the back of my mind. As I said I don’t use Snapchat much so I don't know. He has a snap score of over 60k. People who use snap, is that a normal or average score? Or is he like probably talking to a bunch of girls and sending nudes (I don't know) for context I don’t send nudes so we never have and he’s been very respectful of that. I have no reason not to trust him. - I guess this is my own overthinking and insecurities/ not wanting to get hurt. But what do you think?

[Anonymous]

I think the better question here is what exactly do you want from this man, and are you both on the same page about it. Unless you have mutually decided to be exclusive to each other, then it doesn’t matter if you trust him or not because technically he isn’t misbehaving, that’s if he even is chatting up other women, of course. He would just be acting as a single man exploring his options. You’ve been very hurt in the past, so I understand trying to shield yourself from going through that again — you are not wrong for being cautious. But part of helping yourself at least try to avoid the pain is to make the right choices now. Stop worrying about being the cool, laid back girl and start asking the right questions. If you want a relationship with someone eventually, make sure he not only wants that as well, but proves it to you every day. “Going with the flow” can be a big disappointment in the end if he wants a casual arrangement and you don’t. So clear that up first before investing more of your time into him.

[Guy13]

That's a lot of communications and network. There are obviously other women involved in that dat set.

[Asker]

I know he’s had several exes over the last four years and he told me that he talked to a lot of people over the summer (non-seriously) I don't know how the score works if that’s still including those stats or what -
But I will say he and I have talked multiple times about taking the time to get to know one another and wanting a relationship. I’ve never sent nudes and neither has he and he’s never pushed me to do or send anything.

[Asker]

When I say never sent nudes - I mean with each other

[Guy13]

Anyone talking to ex is trouble and unable to separate relationship. LTR of a wrong kind...

[Asker]

No I didn’t mean he was talking to an ex. I meant he’s probably used Snapchat during their relationship.

[Guy13]

Oh yea, for sure...

[Asker]

I honestly don’t know

[Asker]

Like I’m just confused

[Guy13]

Back away for a couple days and see what he does. Let it go for awhile...

[Asker]

I’ve done that before and he’s always reached out

[Asker]

I’m tempted to ask him to meet up this weekend and just get it over with and go from there

[Asker]

I will say this- we were talking a couple weeks ago and he straight up told me I was the only woman he was talking to. - so unless he is lying I don’t know- but I have no reason to doubt him

[Guy13]

Hmm, say anything... fudge the truth but not totally violate it to get inside the jeans. Nah, never would do that. ;-) Hey, if you trust him that is good in these times !!!

[Asker]

To update he called me a couple days ago and we talked and it was great. Things got a tiny bit spicy. I remembered why I really liked him. We talked for over an hour. And we’ve messaged on and off since. However I’ve decided that I do like him. That’s why I’m done playing around. I’m a grown woman who wants an exclusive relationship and not the little casual games. So I’m gonna not respond for a few days (I’m busy anyway) then I’m gonna suggest meeting up the following week to see how things are. Based on how the meeting goes or what he says I’m gonna make a decision. If we meet up and things are good then proceed to getting to know him and building a relationship. If not rather he doesn’t want to meet up or I think he’s playing games etc then I’m not gonna ghost him. I’m gonna straight up like an adult say look I like you I think you’re a nice guy but I’m grown I have a busy life and no interest for casual or games. I think you want to play and are not ready for serious but I am so I don’t think it’s gonna work.

So yeah - thanks for your advice
Do you think this is a good plan?
Because honestly I like this guy and that’s why I wanna stop fooling around- like either go forward or just end it because it’s been like over two months

[Guy13]

Get’em and good luck. I hope it goes exactly right 💪

[Asker]

Thank you

[Anonymous]

Seems like way to much to me.

[Asker]

Could the score be based on the past or does it stay consistent with activity- I don't know