Guy plays hard to get?

[Anonymous]

From the very beginning, he's always been acting "cool". He took nearly 2 days to reply to me when I asked him if he was free. Thats when he asked me out on a date. The first time I texted him to send my number, he replied several hours later.

He always does this with me. He acts like he doesn't care, plays hard to get and "cool" but on the contrary gets upset if I dont chase him or text him, starts getting passive aggressive if I dont ask him out and has also gotten b0ners just on checking me out (he stares at me a lot)

Why does he do this? he's a fuckboy anyway

[Guy13]

He is Dainty... And used to be chased. Some "pretty guys" get that all their lives and never truly grow out of the "chased girl" syndrome. It has always been about Self-Worship and being worshiped. You are dating a Textbook Narcissist in the making. The gaslighting... lashing out emotionally..."temper and whining tantrums" will get worse rather than better. The best thing you can do is let him phase himself out.-He will if you do not chase him BECAUSE he does not have the desire "to care for you"

He is not playing it cool. It is about his life, his good, and he is totally self-absorbed. These things magnify with Time given the human Condition. RUN...

[Asker]

Can he change?

[Asker]

He did seem like he was running out of patience on 2nd date itself and seemed very irritated that I wasn't touching or seducing him. So he's used to women being all over him on 1st or 2nd dates?

[Asker]

Its been 10 months though and he hasn't phased out

[Guy13]

It does not get better with age. It gets worse and worse. And people become only Objects that serve his Self and Needs. He already functions in a detached and non-responsive manner to you. Not Changing

[Asker]

I know but its been 10 months and he's still around. I ve also noticed that when we dont see each other for a long time, he stares at me a lot when we finally do see each other and has a fond look on his face. Once i saw him after 3 weeks and he heard my voice and quickly turned around and kept watching me. Similar thing happened last week when i saw him after a month and he kept watching me.

[Guy13]

You’ve made up your mind. Subject is closed 😎

[JPresidente]

The answer is in your question. He knows he can get any girl he wants so its an ego boost to him that you chase him and want him. He's probably a good looking dude so he doesn't need to chase or beg for sex, he can get them to come to him. All you'll get from him is sex and nothing else.

[Asker]

I know but its been 10 months and he's still around. I ve also noticed that when we dont see each other for a long time, he stares at me a lot when we finally do see each other and has a fond look on his face. Once i saw him after 3 weeks and he heard my voice and quickly turned around and kept watching me. Similar thing happened last week when i saw him after a month and he kept watching me.

[Asker]

He did seem like he was running out of patience on 2nd date itself and seemed very irritated that I wasn't touching or seducing him. So he's used to women being all over him on 1st or 2nd dates?

[JPresidente]

It sounds like he’s got a pretty big ego and is used to girls chasing him and giving him lots of attention. He probably had a helicopter mom who took care of his every need. He’s obviously sexually attracted to you but I don’t know for sure if he has feelings for you. He just loves the sex and your body from what I can tell.

[Asker]

But we haven't had sex yet?

[JPresidente]

I’m guessing you’ve done other things - dry humping or oral or he’s seen you naked. If that’s the case some of this must have gotten him fired up and he’s expecting more from you at some point so he’s sticking around for that.

[Asker]

No we haven't done anything at all

[Asker]

Hey guys

[JPresidente]

I’d want to follow and message me, that might make it easier and you can give me all the details and I can try and help.

[Asker]

My friend with benefits was seeing a girl a few months ago. They went on 2 dates and my friends with benefits being the player he is, wanted physical intimacy very quick. The girl didn't give him and was more like wanted to go slow and get to know him. My friend wasn't interested in that since he really has a really strong sexual attraction to her.

When she wouldn't make any sexual advances, he tried to make her jealous, stop replying to her texts in hopes she would chase him. Instead, she completely stopped texting him which bothered him a lot. He tried to make small talk with her but she still wouldn't text. He made dummy accounts and stalked her socials and even made a girls account with his name on the username to peak her jealousy.

didn't work.

She was talking to him in person though and never seemed bothered by his behaviour. However, she did seem like she cared for him because when my friend fell ill, she did text him and he expected her to ask him out as he wanted to go out with her again.

But he never asked her and neither did she. So he got mad at her again. They still continued to talk in person which my friend forced himself to do so because for some reason he would get mad at her but wouldn't stop talking or remove her contact.

He also saw her with another guy and got incredibly jealous. He told me about it and basically smoked the entire night obsessing over why she didn't tell him that she was going to see that guy ( she only told him she was going grocery shopping).

He later pulled on a stunt of going away for a month on vacation and leaving her wondering where he is but she never texted him. He then went around looking for her on university campus and did see her after a few days and she just waved but didn't say anything. It was my friend who said something to her but she didn't speak herself.

Whats his issue? He never liked her anyways so whats the drama?

[JPresidente]

Ok. First from her perspective she obviously found him attractive and she stuck to her morals and was not going to give in to him. She was willing to talk with him and overlooked his FBoy behavior because she saw something in him she liked but she won’t waste her time on his efforts to sleep with her. From his perspective he seems to really find this girl attractive and he is used to getting his way and getting what he wants. He still thinks in his mind he can sleep with her. So he’s playing hot and cold with her and trying various tricks to lure her back to him and give in.

[Asker]

How can he sleep with her when he won't even text or meet her*

[JPresidente]

Good question

[Asker]

Yes so what do you say now?

[JPresidente]

Sounds like they’re playing a game of chicken.

[Asker]

What do you mean?

[JPresidente]

He’s gonna not chase after her and see if she comes crawling back to him and she’s not going to pursue him because she knows what he’s after so they are not really going after each other until someone gives in.

[Asker]

Who do you think will give in?

[JPresidente]

Hard to say. I don’t know either of them but whoever you think the most desperate of them to be with someone will be the one to give in. What prize do I get for answering all your questions?

[Asker]

Do you think the guy will?

Most helpful guy award

[JPresidente]

Thanks! If I had to bet, probably him.

[Asker]

Really him? Can you explain why you think so?

[JPresidente]

From the way you described him I think he really finds her attractive and when a guys likes a beautiful woman he will at some points go to great lengths to be with her.

[Asker]

Yeah she wore a pink long dress , white shoes etc and he saw her when she waved and he kept looking etc
Does thiz indicate?

[JPresidente]

Yep. She sounds very beautiful

[Asker]

But he's attracted to hsr beauty only?
Also the next day he also wore white when he was going for a meeting even though before he wore his causal gym clothes but for the meeting he changed to white.

[JPresidente]

I suppose. You are a very persistent person. 😂

[Asker]

Heyyyyyyy

[Asker]

So yesterday the girl met him and he was asking her about whats happening in her life, saying any news? She told him school related stuff and funny enough he knew who her ptofessor was (she had mentioned her professor before but that time he said he didn't know but this time he said he knew) he also was staring at her rather weirdly (fixated gaze on her face) and then he told her he's been "busy".

Why doesn't he tell her he's with me and why is he still talking to her when he won't commit to her. And when he doesn't like her?

[JPresidente]

He is your friends with benefits, right?

[Asker]

Yes but why is he still asking her questions?

[JPresidente]

Hang tight Missy 😂 I’m working towards an answer but I need to make sure I have my facts straight. So you two have been bumping uglies for how long? Do you love him?

[Asker]

No about the girl only. Tell me why he's talking to her? When he doesn't like her?

[JPresidente]

You are tough Sista. He might be trying to make you jealous.

[Asker]

No he wasn't because i wasn't there

[JPresidente]

He could be a horn dog. Something about her intrigues him.

[Asker]

But he doesn't like her right?

[JPresidente]

Nope. He’s just intrigued by her. You love him don’t you?

[Asker]

Stop changing your replies

[JPresidente]

😝😝😝😝

[Changiis07]

Why would you even bother with a f***boy anyways? He get probably upset because he usually gets what he wants which is sex. And maybe you are not giving it to him so he gets passive aggressive in the sense that he is use to girls chasing him and since you don't it bothers him. And good you should set boundaries and respect yourself enough to not bother with guys like that. They aren't looking for anything serious and you would just be wasting your time

[Asker]

You think so? Be ause did seem like he was running out of patience on 2nd date itself and seemed very irritated that I wasn't touching or seducing him. So he's used to women being all over him on 1st or 2nd dates?

[Changiis07]

He is probably used to getting laid yes on the first date. I've dated too many guys to know how it works so just be careful with this one and in the future. Don't give up your goodies to someone just for the moment of pleasure. Let them put effort and treat you like a lady first for sometime and you will know if he truly is interest in you if he continues wine and dining you. If he plays hot and cold that means that he wasn't really in it for the long run, means he just wants sex and nothing serious. Trust me you will save yourself a heartache when you see how they treat you for sometime

[Asker]

I know but its been 10 months and he's still around. I ve also noticed that when we dont see each other for a long time, he stares at me a lot when we finally do see each other and has a fond look on his face. Once i saw him after 3 weeks and he heard my voice and quickly turned around and kept watching me. Similar thing happened last week when i saw him after a month and he kept watching me.

[Asker]

So does he see me as different if he gets laid quickly? We know each other for 10 months now and he couldnt get laid with me

[Changiis07]

He is still around as a friend of course! What is he doing when he isn't around. You just said you haven't seen him in 3 weeks so it sounds like he isn't even trying to take you out on dates? Otherwise he would be more consistent in texting and talking to you everyday. Honestly we can all give you advice on here but at the end of the day you will have to see how it goes but doesn't sound like he is putting as much effort

[Asker]

He doesn't want to be my friend and I already wrote he never texted me first because he was always playing hard to get

[Changiis07]

It just sounds like he is wasting your time. Again you will have to see for yourself how he treats you and if he wants to take things serious. If you are unsure of where you stand with a guy then maybe he just isn't the one

[Asker]

He doesn't delete me when he knows he won't make any move himself and will hook up other girls, then why keep me?

[Changiis07]

Because men like a chase. They can sleep with many girls but once they find one that says no it makes them work harder and put effort to get what they want

[Asker]

But this dude is still not doing anything publicly? Apl i ve seen is when he sees me after a long time he stares more

[Changiis07]

What do you mean exactly? and what exactly do you want with him? Do you want a relationship with him...

[Asker]

I mean whenever we dont see each other for long time, he stares at me a lot more.
Yes relationship

[Changiis07]

Okay so you would like a relationship with him. Is he texting, calling you to hand out? Go to dinner... spend time with you. Is he trying to get to know you? These are questions you should be asking yourself. Sometimes we make the mistake of letting a pretty face make us want the guy but are their intentions good. Do you feel like he is putting effort in trying to get to know you and take you out on dates? if not then he isn't showing much interest. He can stare all he wants but actions speak louder

[Asker]

My friend with benefits was seeing a girl a few months ago. They went on 2 dates and my friends with benefits being the player he is, wanted physical intimacy very quick. The girl didn't give him and was more like wanted to go slow and get to know him. My friend wasn't interested in that since he really has a really strong sexual attraction to her.

When she wouldn't make any sexual advances, he tried to make her jealous, stop replying to her texts in hopes she would chase him. Instead, she completely stopped texting him which bothered him a lot. He tried to make small talk with her but she still wouldn't text. He made dummy accounts and stalked her socials and even made a girls account with his name on the username to peak her jealousy.

didn't work.

She was talking to him in person though and never seemed bothered by his behaviour. However, she did seem like she cared for him because when my friend fell ill, she did text him and he expected her to ask him out as he wanted to go out with her again.

But he never asked her and neither did she. So he got mad at her again. They still continued to talk in person which my friend forced himself to do so because for some reason he would get mad at her but wouldn't stop talking or remove her contact.

He also saw her with another guy and got incredibly jealous. He told me about it and basically smoked the entire night obsessing over why she didn't tell him that she was going to see that guy ( she only told him she was going grocery shopping).

He later pulled on a stunt of going away for a month on vacation and leaving her wondering where he is but she never texted him. He then went around looking for her on university campus and did see her after a few days and she just waved but didn't say anything. It was my friend who said something to her but she didn't speak herself.

Whats his issue? He never liked her anyways so whats the drama?

[Changiis07]

they like the chase! They like the fact that they set boundaries

[Changiis07]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPZqpmIR1eU

[Asker]

So yesterday the girl met him and he was asking her about whats happening in her life, saying any news? She told him school related stuff and funny enough he knew who her ptofessor was (she had mentioned her professor before but that time he said he didn't know but this time he said he knew) he also was staring at her rather weirdly (fixated gaze on her face) and then he told her he's been "busy".

Why doesn't he tell her he's with me and why is he still talking to her when he won't commit to her. And when he doesn't like her?

[Changiis07]

If he wants to pursue her he wouldn't tell her he has a friends with benefits otherwise she would be even less interested in him. Plus he is committing to her yet as she isn't giving him any signals that she likes him so you can't commit to someone that isn't giving you the green light

[Asker]

She did ask him to let her know when he's free but he was mad at her so he didn't reply. So she stopped so its him who is causing issues?

[Changiis07]

It sounds like both, he is annoyed and is being petty so he isn't going to get anywhere if he acts like that after she said to let her know when he is free

[Asker]

Yes so he knows he's not getting anywhere with her so whats the point in still doing all this for her?

[SecretsofKB]

I'll be honest with you, I don't think I would be able to tolerate even a little bit of that. He really doesn't sound like a great person. It seems he likes the idea of you chasing him more than he actually likes you.

[Asker]

He did seem like he was running out of patience on 2nd date itself and seemed very irritated that I wasn't touching or seducing him. So he's used to women being all over him on 1st or 2nd dates?

[SecretsofKB]

Possibly... I don't know though. I would be cautious to keep going with this guy.

[Asker]

So yesterday the girl met him and he was asking her about whats happening in her life, saying any news? She told him school related stuff and funny enough he knew who her ptofessor was (she had mentioned her professor before but that time he said he didn't know but this time he said he knew) he also was staring at her rather weirdly (fixated gaze on her face) and then he told her he's been "busy".

Why doesn't he tell her he's with me and why is he still talking to her when he won't commit to her. And when he doesn't like her?

[spartan55]

Wow, you again? How is he getting 'passive aggressive', have any examples? How do you know he gets angry when you don't text, have any examples? What evidence do you have that he is a fuck boy other than you think he is? Finally, he did not get a boner staring at you, that's made up. Just like everything else.

[Avicenna]

Seems like he’s a total waste of your time

[Changiis07]

I agree

[In_Trance]

he's not really interested. You're an option

[Asker]

What option i haven't even had sex with him

[In_Trance]

That's part of the problem

[Asker]

What problem?