Why do some guys stay together with their girlfriend and stay in the relationship when they started liking/caught interest in another girl?

[Anonymous]

Why don’t they basically just break up and be single and pursue that other woman that they’re attracted to and like, and talk to in a flirty way? Why even bother staying with your girlfriend or keeping her as your girlfriend?

[MrsTurkleton]

A guy can be attracted to many other girls.
He is with the girl he has chosen to be with. . Being attracted and being in love are worlds apart.

Just because he had noticed someone else, doesn’t mean he plans to do anything about it.

The “other woman” often jumps to the conclusion that he suddenly likes her more than the person he cares about, when that isn’t always the case. You’re talking about lust vs something that has been built and developed over time. They aren’t comparable.

if he is choosing to stay in his relationship, it’s because he wants to be there.

[Asker]

Great answer! a lot of people say it’s because he wants to have both and have the freedom to cheat, and that that means the man is basically selfish. Or that he wants to keep his girlfriend around only because she provides him comfort and simply because he “can”. Would you agree with that? Because I personally feel like that means he doesn’t really care that much for his girlfriend and isn’t that in love with her if he makes his interest and attraction known to another woman and talks to her everyday and flirts with her and stuff on his phone..

[MrsTurkleton]

Some guys are like that, they want a safe secure relationship and the excitement of sex with someone else..::but I wouldn’t say that is the case for every guy. You can’t help who you are attracted to. That’s out of his hands….
It really depends on the level of respect he has for his relationship.

Sometimes it gets complex, like if there are shared assets and/or children and it’s not so easy to walk away even if the relationship is all but over….

There are lots of guys who get attention from pretty girls but value their girlfriend too much to act on it:
I think it was Paul Newman who said “Why go out for a burger when you have a steak at home”. There are many guys who have that attitude.

[Kaneki05]

Just gonna say you can like another girl but still be 100% faithful to your girlfriend and want her way more.
But with that out of the way let's talk about the guy who has 2nd thoughts and that or even may cheat. Why don't he just break up? the answer is very simple no one wants to be the bad guy.
Have you ever got with someone told them you love them then try to later on tell them actually no I don't anymore? That can be much harder than the option just to lie and pretend everything is fine.
Therefore you are basically a coward if you don't but the coward choice is always easier so many people pick that. Which hopefully answers your question. It's a tough thing either way that will hurt someone.
Myself has made sure I will always be honest with my feelings even if it's something they don't want to hear.

[ElementoP]

Well it's not easy as breaking the heart of someone you love just to run off with some girl you'll probably be sick of in a week

And this isn't exclusive to men. In fact women probably do it more. They're the ones that like to keep their options open

[Asker]

No ofcourse I agree, women do that as well. But it’s from the man’s side I was interested in for this question. So basically it’s possible when a guy maybe likes another and feels very attracted and wants to talk flirty with her and explore her, still think in his mind “Yeah I don’t think this is someone I would wanna replace my current girlfriend with or pursue more than just sex, but I like her and she’s sexy and attractive and I wanna keep talking to her” even though he has a longterm girlfriend that he doesn’t want to lose or necessarily replace?

[Avicenna]

That is a sign of bad character and judgement to want to have your cake and eat it too.

[Asker]

Could you elaborate please? What do you mean with “have your cake and eat it too”?

[Avicenna]

Cheating while keeping a girlfriend

[Asker]

Ohh yeah I see now, so it’s basically just a man that has bad character then? Is that also being selfish? Wanting to keep your girlfriend/wife but still explore other women and wanting to flirt and have sex with other women at the same?

[Avicenna]

Yeah

[Asker]

It’s pretty interesting to hear such opinion because a lot of men actually justify that nowadays, “alpha men” that are rich or have everything and basically say how a woman shouldn’t leave a man when he’s cheated because it’s in a man’s nature to have sex with other women and they don’r care about that woman, they love their woman and will provide everything for her but “it’s in a man’s nature to find others attractive as well and want to pursue them as well” and compare it to the country’s that allow a man to have multiple wives and stuff. So basically saying that women should understand that all men will cheat once at least and that there’s no men that truly want to be monogamous with one woman forever. I’ve heard it from so many guys and also even men I know personally. What’s your take on that?

[spartan55]

Because they want to have both, and cheat.

[Asker]

So they basically don’t really give many fucks about their girlfriend? They’re pretty much a selfish person then?

[spartan55]

Well, yeah... cheaters are selfish people by default.