Was he rejecting me? Why did he act differently?

[Anonymous]

A guy shown attraction and some flintiness (at work) when I was dressed plain.. but one time I Dressed up in a sundress for my special day he avoided me that day and intentionally avoided being around me…

it stung a bit but I was NOT dressing for him.. but I thought he would show the opposite reaction. I just don’t understand why he acted differently it surprised me

[Anonymous]

I don't know... did he blush? If he blushed than he was shy cos he thought u looked pretty... If he didn't than maybe he was just flirting to flirt and thought you got the wrong idea.

[Asker]

Nope just straight avoided the Fuck outta me. My friend greeted me and I looked back. He saw and gave a subtle smile (he’s friendly) he looked.. after that he walked away and avoided me. He used my index finger to demonstrate something. Then he ended up putting his whole hand on mine while still doing so

[Asker]

But we are coworkers so we can’t really date

[Opinion Owner]

Why can't coworkers date? I find that really stupid. If I wanna date my coworker I'll date him!

[Asker]

He’s my professor love …

[Opinion Owner]

He's your coworker or professor?

[Asker]

He’s my professor 😭

[Opinion Owner]

Ewww he sounds like a creep! 🤮

[Asker]

Noooo lmao we are around the same age 😭 he is not a creep

I’m 25 he’s 32

[Opinion Owner]

Oh. Still strange to flirt with your students even if they're close to the same age as you.

[Asker]

The only reason it’s not weird is bc he was a student there 2 years ago.. the students he’s teaching now were his classmates once.. so I know personally that he’s not a creep. He’s well respected and maybe he hasn’t mentally transitioned yet.

But sometimes you just can’t help who you’re attracted to but he could just be a player/flirt.. but I thought he was genuinely interested.. but now he’s dating a hot model

[Opinion Owner]

Wait... he's dating someone? then why are you wasting your time with him?

[Asker]

I’m not I was just curious on his behavior then..

[Opinion Owner]

Why do you care? He's taken.

[Asker]

Bc he wasn’t taken during that time and I’m curious on why the switch

[Opinion Owner]

Well he's taken now so who the fuck cares

[Asker]

I care tf

[Opinion Owner]

Stop being a dumb bitch or you'll get used by him 🤦‍♀️

[Asker]

Used how? ESP. If he was avoiding me! How do you sound?

[Asker]

Also I don’t see him anymore bc I dropped his class. So he’s not my prof anymore

[Opinion Owner]

Then why are you obsessed with him?

[Asker]

I’m not obsessed with anybody I just asked a question

[kylee2437]

Who knows the reasoning.

[Asker]

Well I need some explanation … it doesn’t make sense..

[kylee2437]

The only proper explanation you can get is from the guy himself. We don’t know why he avoided you that day, it may have nothing to do with how you were dressed

[Asker]

I know no one knows why I just wanted suggested to wrap my head around it that’s all

[kylee2437]

There’s nothing to wrap around it lol if you come into contact with him, ask him

[Asker]

The secret is… he was actually my professor..(we are close in age)

[kylee2437]

Hmmm you sure he wasn’t just being friendly and now he feels like you took it a little too far?

[Asker]

I never shown any kind of interest in him. He’s been a bit flirty, but not in a uncomfortable way but he def has shown some attraction

[kylee2437]

In what ways? What has he said

[Asker]

Okay so I never had his classes prior.. our art building is very small. I never paid attention to him but other student (female) took a liking towards him. He is a friendly guy and he’s the youngest in that department.

I would see him around sometimes he would smile or he would ask if mr. So&so is in the office.. it’s nothing and I just write him off as a nice guy.

But his energy around me.. I could feel that he was a bit attracted.. I have a hardcore look bc I’m super serious about my art and don’t like distractions..

Part 2

[kylee2437]

@asker maybe he does have attraction/ maybe he doesn’t. I think in most cases, professors do try to keep it as professional as possible with students. I wouldn’t push it unless there is a clear cut sign that he does want something beyond that point

[Asker]

So I didn’t know he was going to be teaching this class bc a different name was on the roster..
But I the first thing I noticed was that he was always glancing at me.. no matter where I am in the room or when I walk through the door he’s smiling and looking.. (I’m like okay nothing much)

But I notice that I would do small things and he would give me extra points with a grin.. or when he’s talking to the class he looks directly at me longer before looking elsewhere

One time.. he was helping other students who were struggling and he keeps looking over at me.. (I wasn’t struggling) then he walks over and stands right next to me and look me in my eyes and says “I finally get to come to you, how are you?” With a smile.. I got so nervous.. I scouted over and he felt I was uncomfortable so he moved away and complimented my work

[kylee2437]

Hmmm who knows. I think unless if he makes an actual clear cut move, I would just keep it professional. Maybe he has some sort of attraction but the title of his job and the dynamic is just beyond his level of comfort

[Asker]

But now he’s dating a very attractive model lol jokes on me

[kylee2437]

Yeah so maybe it’s just time to fall back lol probably has nothing to do with you personally, he just has a life outside of his job lol

[Asker]

But I still feel like … why would you flirt with a student (even though I’m not young) I’m 25 he’s 32. … and why fort of you were already talking someone

[kylee2437]

Maybe he just has a flirty personality, who knows. Many guys do have flirty personalities especially more outgoing men.

[Asker]

That sucks a bit. I almost felt special lmao emotional damage

[kylee2437]

Lol sorry, but it’s okay it happens. You will find many guys that like you

[Asker]

Last thing, Yeah, but him showing attraction while he was already talking to someone is a bit foul… but I’m not too mad bc they were just friends at the time… i think he was a bit unsure if her in the beginning … I actually didn’t reciprocate my interest back to him… I think i made it seem like I wasn’t interested.. by the time I tried to open up it was too late

He kind of started avoiding me… I had even dressed up (for my birthday) and he just avoided being around me and looking at me. He was still nice but I could tell he was prop starting to fall for her.

[Asker]

I dropped the class. I didn’t need it

[Asker]

Alsoooo he shot a jealous look at a guy I was laughing with/ talking to but didn’t know

[Anonymous]

He may prefer, even strongly perhaps, women dressing in a muted, serious, fashion.
Or what you wore may have nothing to do with it.

[Asker]

It was a simple sundress… I really doubt that’s the case. He dressed casual himself so I don’t think he’s picky like that but it’s still weird to act that way. It’s puzzling

[Opinion Owner]

But if your "special day" wasn't today... other days followed the day in question.
What did he do then?

[Asker]

I didn’t really see him anymore bc I had worked in another department so it’s hard to say but he did seem to change a bit..

[Asker]

I feel like my question is still not being answered tho.. from a guys perspective

[Opinion Owner]

Or maybe it was, yet you didn't get it 🤠

[Asker]

I would like a straight answer to this please

[Opinion Owner]

Very well: given the data you provided us with, it's (as should be obvious...) impossible for anyone to know what went on in his mind, and whether your clothing that day had any part in it.

[Asker]

And it’s pretty obvious that I know you don’t know why.. I was just asking your opinion on why you “think”… I’m not expecting anyone to know why

[Opinion Owner]

It is to admit you can be a quite funny one.
Except when wearing sundresses, probably. Lol.

[Opinion Owner]

It is to be admitted*

[Asker]

Thnx, have a good day.

[Opinion Owner]

I'll wish you an OK life. Which is sort of over a good day in importance :).

[Asker]

Back atcha

[spartan55]

Ohhh.. you mean your teacher? You are still hung up on that? oh my.

[Asker]

Yes because no one seems to know why

[spartan55]

You still think he was in love with you because he looked at you... 😂

[Asker]

I never said he was in love with me and I told you numerous times that I never even noticed him before

[Asker]

I’m not making this up.. I hate that you gaslight me or make me feel like it didn’t happen

[spartan55]

"numerous times"? Yeah okay. So, you 'never even noticed him before'... but he had 'shown attraction before'... well how would you know that if you never noticed him. Why did you dress up to get a reaction out of him... if you never noticed him before? Are you listening to yourself?

[Asker]

First of all I only dressed up that specific day bc it was my birthday.

[Asker]

Okay so I never had his classes prior.. our art building is very small. I never paid attention to him but other student (female) took a liking towards him. He is a friendly guy and he’s the youngest in that department.

I would see him around sometimes he would smile or he would ask if mr. So&so is in the office.. it’s nothing and I just write him off as a nice guy.

But his energy around me.. I could feel that he was a bit attracted.. I have a hardcore look bc I’m super serious about my art and don’t like distractions..

[Asker]

So I didn’t know he was going to be teaching this class bc a different name was on the roster..
But I the first thing I noticed was that he was always glancing at me.. no matter where I am in the room or when I walk through the door he’s smiling and looking.. (I’m like okay nothing much)

But I notice that I would do small things and he would give me extra points with a grin.. or when he’s talking to the class he looks directly at me longer before looking elsewhere

One time.. he was helping other students who were struggling and he keeps looking over at me.. (I wasn’t struggling) then he walks over and stands right next to me and look me in my eyes and says “I finally get to come to you, how are you?” With a smile.. I got so nervous.. I scouted over and he felt I was uncomfortable so he moved away and complimented my work

[spartan55]

Lol... you had a little crush on him and projected that onto the situation.. that's all this is.
I'm not claiming you are making anything up. I am suggesting you are seeing this the way you want because of your bias.
You wore the outfit to get a reaction out of him, and when he didn't give you the one you thought he would then he was avoiding you...

[Asker]

First of all I never/rarely dress up! THAT is not true. I wasn’t doing anything special so I just decided to wear a sundress on my birthday. It was on the day I had class

[Asker]

A reaction would have been nice but it was okay if he didn’t. I felt like I started to show interest when it was too late.. he was falling for his now girlfriend

[spartan55]

So that's why you got all bent out of shape because he didn't give you any attention... right? "I thought he would have the opposite reaction"... but it was all coincidence.

[spartan55]

If it was 'okay if he didn't' then you wouldn't still be obsessed with this months later... just stop already.

[Asker]

Because like I said.. he was showing signs of attraction so I was confused

[spartan55]

It's still very vague just what these 'signs of attraction' were.

[Noahzaid]

Special day?

[Asker]

My birthday

[Noahzaid]

Oh happy birthday, Dear.

[Asker]

It was a month ago

[Asker]

I’m wondering why he acted that way