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Seriously if you can't contribute to her life what are you going to contribute to theirs?
Asker wants to hear from Guys only. Login to share your opinion.
There is a lot of bitterness and projection I can read between the lines. Perhaps the guys complaining about the kids often do not feel like they contributed nothing to the relationship. Women can leave for many other reasons, other man, no longer being in love, a fight that broke out that may not have been the mans fault, etc. Grouping it all together in one question is pointless because you aren't going to be targeting the audience of your question, yet you treat all the comments as if they are these kind of guys while they raise points on how biased and unfair the system is against them.
So assuming you asked this because you are in the situation and analyzing the kind of interactions you have been doing on the other posters something tells me it wasn't a one sided issue and you seek some justification on why it would have been.
If I am right on that, the only real answer to your question would be because both of you know he wasn't the sole issue in this and he deserves to see his kids to. If a guy is solely to blame for his wife leaving him and him loosing the kids I assume he'd have a much easier time accepting he screwed up. Especially if deep down he knows that the kids are better off without him.
Yeah, I got to call Bull Shit on this. Women and Men both should not use their kids as tool in their divorce. Cutting a man off from his kids is a vile, evil and disgusting thing to do. It called Parental Alienation, and it does more harm to the kids than anything else.
Maybe he would of contributed more to you within the marriage if you were a better wife and contributed more as far as emotional support to him? Do pretend your perfect and you did all the right things. Sure, some men are just terrible people, but unless he was threat to the child you did more harm than good by cutting him off from him. That does not make you a good person.
Typical woman statement.
Why is it on the man to contribute to a woman's life? It's not the 1400's, and you all chose to embrace feminism; so, why does a guy have to do anything for you? After all, you can do it all on your own. Relationships now, in theory, are suppose to be 50/50; so, instead of asking what he's doing for you, what the f are you doing for him?
Kids are a completely different matter- they're still dependent, and realistically even a guy who doesn't give af about you will still care for the kids. Women will use kids as bargaining chips to extract as many resources and concessions out of a man, and the courts permit them to do this.
It seems you're doing the same: "you have to do for me first before I'll let you do for him."
In other words, you support women using their children as a weapon?
A bad boyfriend/husband does not mean that he is a bad father.
I don't care if he broke your heart and cheated on you. When you become a parent, you are supposed to put your child first, and a child needs their dad. Just look at all of the criminals who grew up in fatherless homes. Kids are more likely to succeeding life with BOTH parents (especially the same sex parent) in their life.
To keep a child away from a loving and capable father is cruel and puts that child at an unnecessary disadvantage in life.
He absolutely can be a good father. First of all, good parents don't involve their kids in their problems. A good mother would never let their kid find out that he cheated on her.
Unless he is physically abusive, nothing justifies keeping a child away from their father.
"if anything he will teach his children how to be criminals..."
Statistics say otherwise, but sure... If you say something is true then it must be true. (sarcasm)
countless studies have proven how crucial BOTH parents (again, especially same-sex parents) are to a child's development.
You are gleefully defending child abuse. You can disagree all you want, but that doesn't make you any less of a neglectful mother.
" A good mother would never let their kid find out that he cheated on her."
ROFL. Go suck a donkey's dick ya spineless dog. Cheating is emotional & psychological abuse - statistical facts whoreman - so you are saying that she should expose her children to an emotional & psychologically abusive piece of trash that cares SO LITTLE for the family household and cares SO LITTLE for his own children's well being that he cheats.
Cheating is solely a selfish venture & the dog should be sterilized.
I'm not defending cheating - I'm saying that your bad taste in men shouldn't become your kid's problem.
My daughter's mother cheated on me, and I would NEVER bring that up and talk negatively about her mother in front of my daughter.
We both have a job to do, and we co-parent together just fine. She wasn't a good partner to me. She's an amazing mother. Both things can be true.
You are free (I did not delete your last response by the way. Must have been a mod. I'm cool with letting you publicly embarrass yourself) to be emotional, resort to childish insults, and disagree but what you are describing IS child abuse.
Nobody wants to think of themselves as a child abuser, and nobody wants to admit that they are fucking up their kid, so I don't expect you to admit this about yourself- so this conversation is pointless.
This is my last response. Have a good day/night.
Are you SO STUPID you can't comprehend simple things. I never said it was me you retarded shit-for-brains I said in general for one.
Lol, you also never said you weren't talking about yourself.
If you go back and reread, I mentioned you being supportive of child abuse, and being an abusive mother. I knew one of them applies to you- either way, you're still on team child abuse.
Just keep digging yourself a deeper hole haha
Lol. Now I'm done
You tell her my man, its BULL SHIT!!! I am a Victim of this troll shit. My ex-wife did not work, she lived in $500,000.00 house, had expensive furniture, cloths and like 80 pairs of shoes and glasses... nice cars... all paid for in full.
But she weaponized my children against me, Parental Alienation and cut my kids off from me... canceled their cell phone, changed their numbers, closed their social media accounts.
FUCK that SHIT! I loved and provided everything for my kids, spent every weekend at their sports events, drove them everywhere, gave them my everything. But she wanted to hurt me, and this is the only way she could make a mark on me... it it was soul crushing. Fuck this post!
@DavidJord Awful. I'm sorry man.
It’s pretty hilarious that you call the men on here idiots and retards while at the same time making a plethora of grammatical mistakes, ignoring their counter arguments or responding to them with nonsense and non-sequiturs, and spewing barely intelligible misandry (i. e. man-hate.) Your core premise hinges on the idea that the fact that you left your ex in the first place somehow logically implies that he is deficient as a man and as a parent; but it is painfully obvious from your childish, hostile, unsophisticated, and primitive way of conversing with others that you are the one who is actually deficient. As others have stated, you’re an superb example of the Dunning-Kruger effect in action. I can only pray for your ex and your children, lord knows that they’ll need all of the prayers and good will that they can get if they’re bearing the unfortunate and tumultuous burden of the company of someone such as yourself.
Yet you lack the simple intelligence to comprehend my question & answer it - WHAT WOULD YOU CONTRIBUTE OR SAY TO CONVENIENCE THE JUDGE OTHERWISE.
by the way there has been no counterarguments you moronic cunt.
“By” should be capitalized, “has” should be “have” and there should be two commas in that sentence. Please use proper grammar and punctuation when calling someone else a moron.
Well in some cases this is true. People leave relationships for a lot of reasons you know…. Now with that being said many times both parties play the victim when they’re both probably in the wrong somewhere or another.
Some women cry victim too if the kids are given to the man. A good judge tries to find where the children will be the best off and if the man is a deadbeat well… Though sometimes I think there is bias.
Is this a troll question?
What's the line, boys?: Accountability is a woman's kryptonite. She couldn't possibly have left the father because she's a bad person. Always and only the man's fault...
Just look at "her" responses. Clearly a troll. I shall be muting the entire convo as it is pointless.
@LiamJHayden Yet you lack the simple intelligence to comprehend my question & answer it - WHAT WOULD YOU CONTRIBUTE OR SAY TO CONVENIENCE THE JUDGE OTHERWISE.
So you don't think the children need their fathers? Maybe he was a douchebag to you but that doesn't mean he's that way to his children. I would think the only reason the court system would stop him from seeing his kids was because he was a douchebag and treated them poorly. That's understandable why they would stop his visitations. Otherwise I see no reason for him not to see his children. You're only doing it to be vengeful
If a man can contribute anything to a woman's life then he will certainly cannot contribute anything of value to the children aside from teaching them how to be a fellow douchebag. Is that valuable in today's society? No. So it's for a better for them to be as far as possible from douchebag and actually get ahead in life instead of being trash like him.
*can't
I totally disagree, he may have treated you like shit but that doesn't mean he's that way with his children. You're just hurt and upset that you weren't good enough to keep your man. So now let's punish him. You're the douchebag
Of course it will. Men like that are losers and abusive to those "weaker" than them.
Furthermore he's just going to teach them to treat other women like shit - hardly the conduct of a respectable individual in the society - and he should be sterilized like the vermin he is
What if your kids wanted to see their father?
Broken system. I wonder how would you feel if rules were written against you.. woman.
How about guy gets free ride you pay bills and then guy takes kids and you work your butt off to support him and kids and you end up with no retirement and kids you paid for hating you?
Nice.. woman simply are too low logically to realize any of that.
Women lie and cheat all the time and many contribute very little positive to their children's lives. I have repeatedly seen it for the last 12 years while working in schools.
Wherever did I mention line and cheating do you know how to read? And if you can't read above a fifth grade level you should not be teaching. Mind you might just be the janitor
More proof the Anonymous Asker exemplifies the Dunning-Kruger Effect! While you didn’t mention lying a cheating, your post implies women are never at fault for break ups.
Taking a kid from their father is a disgusting thing to do.
A father should have a right to see their kid at will.
Yet you lack the simple intelligence to comprehend my question & answer it - WHAT WOULD YOU CONTRIBUTE OR SAY TO CONVENIENCE THE JUDGE OTHERWISE.
I totally agree with you @Hispanic-Cool-Guy
Sounds like someone is a bit detached from reality.
Yet you contribute nothing to your child's life. It's a very simple question that even a retard could answer.
Using that same logic, I’d a man screws around on his wife, she obviously wasn’t contributing to his life, or he wouldn’t have done it.
Are you an idiot?
Well, I scored 99.8th percentile on tgg by e GMAT when I applied to graduate school. Are you familiar with the Dunning-Krueger Effect?
“on the GMAT.” Autocorrect got me.
Mike do get a life & stop talking about things you couldn't possibly hope to understand. Dunning-Krueger Effect would apply to you. 99.8th percentile and yet on this forum populated mostly by uneducated whiny losers instead of doing something useful with yourself.
Those uneducated, whiny losers meaning you?
ROFL. No just most of the loser idiot men that responded.
Like them you lack the simple intelligence to comprehend my question & answer it - WHAT WOULD YOU CONTRIBUTE OR SAY TO CONVENIENCE THE JUDGE OTHERWISE.
I’d show a judge your irrational babbling here and show reason to question your mental state, intelligence and temperament.
Neither I have a kid niether I give a f**k about this coz it ain't my problem. It's a problem of those Stupid men who despite knowing everything about consequences of marriage still get married!
Let me tell you my take, I have no sympathy to these men. I was never in support of stupidity and self destruction!
Weird way to say "women can never be terrible people".
Yet you lack the simple intelligence to comprehend my question & answer it - WHAT WOULD YOU CONTRIBUTE OR SAY TO CONVENIENCE THE JUDGE OTHERWISE.
I don't mind if my future wife left with kids.. will pay her for taking care of them but I won't give my inheritance to children from her if she tried to poison there mind against me
@AmeerX Please don't think those negative things.
@Jamie05rhs I suppose it was something negative ((
It's a very interesting subject actually, maybe you should go and learn something about it.
Yet you lack the simple intelligence to comprehend my question & answer it - WHAT WOULD YOU CONTRIBUTE OR SAY TO CONVENIENCE THE JUDGE OTHERWISE.
Ahh yes all men are dead beats.
Speaks volumes about the women having kids with them
if you get married you should stay forever togeter, that how the voul is "whntile death will separate us"
And yes, this question has been featured by GAG.
Though the baby grows in her womb she has no more right on the baby as him
Maybe you did until the kids, and now you contribute to their's instead of her's.
Someone actually fucked you?
Yeah & well. Lot better than you can your girlfriend because he's got balls, you and many of the whiny wimps on this site don't
My girlfriend is your mom, she's more than satisfied
ROFL. Nah she likes men with balls & brains. You've neither.
Utter and complete bullsh*t.
Yet you contribute nothing to your child's life. It's a very simple question that even a retard could answer.
No, your question itself is BS. I work on cases frequently where the dad is denied access for a loser, druggie mm because the family courts are twisted.
And I have no children so of course I don't contribute to my non-existent child's life nor to the non-existent mother's.
There'There's many factors of why people
Typo, there are many factors on why people leave relationships. But yes, if he's not contributing then it wouldn't make sense for him to get the kids, but you're just hurting your kids if you try to keep them away from their father unless he's a Violent Person. Take your emotions out of it and think about the kids.
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