Why do some nice, genuine guys fall for toxic, narcissistic women?

[Anonymous]

[CarrieNC]

Wow, that's a really interesting question. I've definitely seen it happen in my own life and it can be so confusing. I think it all comes down to attraction and the way we see ourselves.

For example, in my freshman year of college, I had a crush on this guy who was just the sweetest, most genuine guy ever. But he ended up dating this girl who was just a complete nightmare. She was always putting him down and manipulating him, but he couldn't see it. I think he was just so drawn to her confidence and the way she made him feel like he needed to work for her attention.

Then in my sophomore year, I had a friend who was dating this girl who was just so self-absorbed and always talking about herself. But he was so in love with her and couldn't see that she was using him for her own gain. I think he just loved the way she made him feel like he was important to her.

And even in my own dating experiences, I've fallen for guys who were just not good for me. I think it's because they had this certain charm or confidence that made me feel like I needed to prove myself to them.

But I've also had experiences where I've been attracted to genuinely good guys who treat me well and make me feel good about myself. And those relationships have been so much healthier and happier.

So, I think it really comes down to what we see in ourselves and what we're looking for in a partner. Sometimes, we get caught up in the thrill of someone who makes us feel wanted, even if they're not good for us. But when we learn to love ourselves and know our worth, we attract the kind of people who will treat us with the respect and kindness we deserve.

Hope that makes sense, and sorry if it's all over the place. Just my personal thoughts on the matter.

[Asker]

Exactly. I had a friend who told me she’d intentionally have mood swings to trick the guys she was dating and keep them “excited.” She complained about all these guys treating her bad, but now she’s with a guy who she says showers her with gifts and is good in the sack and cooks for her, etc. but then she talked badly about him to me and how he “isn’t hot” and doesn’t have an amazing job. Oh and she goes behind his back with other guys and worried I’d tell him. But yet he’s sooo obsessed with her. I wondered how such manipulative women have success with men, but I’m realizing it’s probably men who don’t love themselves and need a complementary partner.

[NachtjaegerSS]

I think women bend two ways:. Toxic as fuck or they have little to no personality at all.

It gets so tiring meeting woman after woman who just sits there with a blank look on her face and has nothing to talk about. The toxic women seem exciting at first, until you realize they are actually really fucked up.

[FilmGuy93]

Emotional abuse doesn't just go from men to women. Women can very abusive in their own right.

[Asker]

I’m seeing more and more women be the abusers nowadays. It’s scary.

[FilmGuy93]

Oh trust me; it hasn’t changed. Women have always been this abusive

[Asker]

I learned my dad took his life after my parents divorced several years ago. Seems like divorce and child support are incredibly overwhelming.

[FilmGuy93]

I'm so sorry! That's horrible. Your father definitely reacted unusually bad to the situation, but lots of women also weaponize the legal system in divorce and child support settlements.

Society has taught women to feel entitled to whatever men have. What he owns, belongs to you because you are likely the reason he has what he has. And everything else about the way society is set up gives you the same message that men's success comes off the backs of women. It's a horribly toxic society.

[Anonymous]

Women don't typically compliment and show guys attention. So an inexperienced guy erroneously reads this as interest on her part when really it's just her pumping him up. Once she's got him on the hook then she flips the script. If a guy is trusting sometimes it takes him a while to learn that some women can be so manipulative.

[exitseven]

I have an uncle who was a cop. He used to say "the sadists always find the masochists"

[misogynistic_pig]

Because narcissistic women look for those types of men because they are easier to manipulate.

[Dav1dTh0ma3]

We think they're nice and sweet, until they turn into deceitful a holes

[Asker]

Because they’re fake and probably exhausted concealing their true colors.

[es20490446e]

They assume everyone to be as well intended as them.

[BJP21]

They dont realize they are being treated like shit and they put up with it.

[Luopio27]

Cuz they are pretty I guess.

[arandomgirlbruh]

cz we are confident

[Asker]

These aren’t confident women I’m referring to.