Why are men so desperate for sex yet disappear at any sign of responsibility?

[Haha456]

Over my years, i have learned that 95 percent of all guys would say yes to unprotected sex but YET, would disappear at the sight of any responsibility for a baby if it comes up.

Updates

+1 y

I dont know if it is just me but i just find this to be deeply disturbing. Yet people act like it is an accepted norm of society

[MrOracle]

You aren't a man, so you will never be able to fully grasp the importance sex plays in a man's life. It's not a mere want, it's a NEED - just as important to most men as breathing or eating. We can't be happy without it, and we are driven to seek it whenever we aren't already getting it.

You know how nearly all women are more emotional, how they are much better in-tune with other people's emotions, why they overwhelmingly choose professions that deal with people rather than "things", and how they feel maternal around infants or kittens or puppies? As a woman, you didn't ask to be that way, did you? What about all the other women you know - did they ask for that? No - it's just what women ARE - inherent traits and instincts that act strongly upon you whether you want them or not. Men craving sex is exactly the same thing - something we didn't ask for, but something we feel STRONGLY and CONSTANTLY, in a way most women just can't grasp. This is what men ARE.

Another thing many women just don't understand is that men can separate sex from love/emotions/connections. Let me clarify: men DO fall in love, and when they're in love, sex with their partner is MEANINGFUL - but it was the love that made it meaningful, and the love had to exist FIRST. Now the part that most women have trouble with: when we aren't in love, we still crave sex intensely, and we NEED NOT have any feelings for the women we're getting sex from. We're perfectly capable of having casual sex - meaning sex simply for the purpose of having sex, feeling pleasure, and getting that release - and we can do this while having ZERO romantic feelings for the girl. She needs only be at least minimally attractive to us physically, and willing.

For men, we meet a woman and spend a bit of time with her, and we either have romantic feelings for her or we don't - and most women, we don't. But many of those women who we don't have feelings for, we still find physically attractive, and if we can get casual sex from them, we will, because we CONSTANTLY CRAVE sex, because we are men. But this is JUST sex for us - it has no meaning beyond that - and so it's very easy for men not to care about anything afterwards, because with that girl, he was never emotionally invested in any way. I stress again, things are very different when he's with a girl he has romantic feelings for, but for the last 40+ years, women have been sleeping with LOTS of men that don't have romantic feelings for them - usually because the guy is attractive, or will pay to feed and entertain her - but if he has no feelings for her, why would she expect him to care if something were to happen?

This is all easily avoided - women could choose not to have casual sex - but as long as they DO have casual sex, they will be having sex with men who don't care about them for anything more than sex, and they should not expect those men to have any interest in responsibility for anything, since they had no emotional connection in the first place.

But women crave male attention, especially from attractive guys, so they won't stop having casual sex with those guys, even knowing those guys have no feelings for them.

[Haha456]

A man's NEED for sex is not an excuse to evade responsibility for an innocent living being. There is NO EXCUSE for such immoral conduct. Men need to take responsibility over their own actions. And no, women are not to blame for men's irresponsibility and lack of morality.

Abandoning your own children should be an arrestable crime. Its disturbing to see this become an accepted norm in society. And it shouldn't be an accepted norm

[Haha456]

And if you take a look around, it is MEN who wreck society. Over 90% of crimes are committed by men. Vast majorty of parents who abandon their kids are also men.

and now you're going to put the blame on women for men abandoning their own kids.

There is never a justifiable excuse to abandon your own children. This itself is a form of child abuse.

[MrOracle]

I actually AGREE with you, completely. That's how things SHOULD be. But that's not how things ARE, and it's not how things likely will ever be, so it isn't wise to live by rules that only work in a perfect utopia where everything is as it should be. Instead, you have to live by rules that work in the real world that you actually live in. And since women control access to sex (as it should be, and as women rightfully insist), that power comes with responsibility, and in this case, that means being a good gatekeeper, and only admitting those who have proven to be responsible. If you are a bad gatekeeper, and you let known irresponsible people inside, then you are responsible for the havoc they wreak. You can't have authority without the responsibility that comes with it.

Nothing you or I do is going to make selfish, irresponsible men act responsibly. They have every reason to be irresponsible, and it's easy for them to get away with it in most cases. That's the real world we are in today, so how do you deal with that reality? in my opinion, the only way is to keep tight control on who gets access to your vagina, and that's something only YOU can do. Am I wrong? Is there a better way? I'm all ears.

[Haha456]

I don't give a shit if men can separate sex from emotions or how sex is a need for men. Both of these are basically EXCUSES that you presented to justify terrible immoral behavior.

And its very sad that some people still try to justify something like this.

No innocent life deserves to be treated this way upon entering the world.

[Haha456]

[Nothing you or I do is going to make selfish, irresponsible men act responsibly.]

Yes you can. By lobbying for the right laws, by teaching young boys / teenagers to act responsibly. It can totally be changed.

Its juts that some men are determined for things to be changed versus other men who don't really care about changing things because they feel like sleeping around is a man's right.

[MrOracle]

There are already laws in place to punish this, but even the death penalty wouldn't stop a sizable group of men from acting this way - and most would get away with it. Again, I *agree* that this is wrong and immoral and I don't support it at all - I'm just telling you how things work in the real world. Instincts are WAY more powerful than laws, and there are always going to be a group of men who will ignore any law when their instincts kick in.

In any case, lobbying for new laws and teaching young boys is going to do ZERO for the women TODAY. I'd argue that it won't do anything long-term either, but even if I stipulated that it would, it still does nothing TODAY.

[Haha456]

[In any case, lobbying for new laws and teaching young boys is going to do ZERO for the women TODAY. ]

its more like you don't want to do anything about it and let things slide than to do the right thing.

[There are already laws in place to punish this, but even the death penalty wouldn't stop a sizable group of men from acting this way]

there AREN'T any laws put in place to prevent this from happening. Most single mothers DON'T even get child support!!! Deadbeat dads who abandon their kids DO NOT GET ARRESTED!!!

do you know how common it is for dads to ditch their kids? very common. It is common because THERE ARE NO CONSEQUENCES.

[MrOracle]

Any man who has an actual, legal job, who doesn't pay child support, will end up in jail. I know - I've known guys who have ended up there.

The problem is that women sleep with lots of men who either have no job, or who are working under the table or in a criminal enterprise (selling weed, for example). The government won't pursue men who don't have an income, because they have no way to pay, and it would be a waste of money. Again, this is why it's going to fall to women to actually take responsibility for who they sleep with - there are ALWAYS loopholes with the law. Plus, in more left-leaning areas these days, states are choosing not to enforce the laws that are already on the books, so a new law would do little anyway. There are violent felons who are being released on probation, committing more violent felonies, and are released again to commit even more violent felonies - it's definitely the normal routine here on the West Coast. If they're releasing murderers and rapists, do you really think they're going to pursue deadbeat dads with no legal income?

I'm not DEFENDING the actions of these deadbeat dads, but I know how the system works. The wealthy get a free pass because they have the money for lawyers and influence, and the poor get a free pass because they have no money to pay (at least, no money earned legally, where it can be tracked), so only the middle class are affected.

Plus, there are LOTS of cases of promiscuous women who don't even know who the father is, and plenty of guys get a pass because of that.

Who has the power to stop all of this? Women. But they choose not to, because women do not want to take responsibility for their own choices either.

[Haha456]

Exactly!! Men who don't make enough money do not have to pay. This means the law isn't tough enough on enforcing responsibiltiy on men. In other words, the government doesn't care. The consequences aren't severe enough. Its an easy get away for dead beat dads.

In my opinion, all men should pay child support regardless of their income levels. If you don't make enough money to pay child support, WORK 2 JOBS. If you can't pay, YOU SHOULD GO TO JAIL.

Women shouldn't be blamed for having run away fathers. Because truth is, there's no way for a woman to ensure that a man will stay for his child. I have seen married men ditch their wives and kids. I have seen couples who refuse to get married. Some men are smooth talkers who manipulate women for sex.

This is just your way of letting men evade responsibility.

[Haha456]

@MrOracle

[MrOracle]

It's not MY way - you keep trying to hold ME responsible somehow, when I have no part in this process at all. I'm not a law-maker, nor am I in law enforcement, nor am I in the executive branch who sets law enforcement policies and funds jails and prisons. I'm merely providing analysis.

Let's say you have guy who has no job, and can't pay. You put him in prison - then what? Prison costs the government $200,000 per year per prisoner, and the man still generates zero income and pays zero child support. How has that made the situation any better? The left has created laws that ban prison labor, calling it slavery, so there's no opportunity for imprisoned men to work at anything that might generate a profit - at best, they can fight fires or clear weeds and trash - so you'd be locking up men at high cost to the state, while generating zero dollars to pay for these children. How is that better? This is exactly why the state does not, and will not, enforce these laws on men with no (official) incomes. That creates a gaping loophole in the law that can't reasonably be closed. So, now what?

[Haha456]

[It's not MY way - you keep trying to hold ME responsible somehow, when I have no part in this process at all.]

what have you presented on here other than "I completely agree with you " along with "PLenty of other bullshit excuses why men should be able to abandon their kids"

[Let's say you have guy who has no job, and can't pay. You put him in prison - then what?]

how about the government paying welfare to these single moms an extra 500 a month per child until they reach the age of 18?

[Haha456]

[[It's not MY way - you keep trying to hold ME responsible somehow, when I have no part in this process at all.]

what do you think lobbying is for?

[Haha456]

abandoning kids should be a form of child abuse.

[Haha456]

do you realize the government actually gives single moms money for each child under 18? its called welfare. either the father pays it or the government pays it.

[Haha456]

someone like you going around GAG calling women a disgrace for not being housewives. or your constant shaming women for not being full time parents to their children. YET you are able to come up with a boat load of excuses of why men shouldn't be held responsible for being fathers.

how ironic...

makes me question your true intentions...

[lightbulb27]

they are poorly trained, disciplined, and ashamed of themselves. They fear the relationship, and some have legit reasons so if they had poor references in the family.

The ones I knew growing up, one in particular, didn't have daddy. Boys without daddy are often very attractive, and hazardous.

[Anonymous]

I've noticed a lot of men have this "I must procreate and keep my bloodline alive" and they often claim it's a matter of nature or animalistic normalcy. Basically comparing themselves to that of an animal in the wild. All their excuses are fucking stupid though no matter which way you look at it.

[Anemone978]

You should always talk about it with the person you are fucking, obviously if you ain't partners it shouldn't be happening unprotected...

[Anemone978]

Plus If you are allowed to kill his baby then he is allowed to abandon his baby... that is fair LOL
You made the choice to let him in...

[FilmGuy93]

Is it really so hard to understand why someone would want pleasure without consequences?

[midnightmoon05]

People in general will get what they can if they can get away with it.
I will only give my body till I know them well enough…that they are marriage material.

[curlyfirecracker]

Uh, well... it is a completely different experience unprotected. They can actually feel like they are having sex and enjoy the sensations.

[Fireguy17]

Because all they want is sex.
So as long as that is happening everything is fine, but like you said once you tell them we have to talk they are gone so fast that if you blinked you missed it.

[boggboss]

Because they only care about the pleasure they get from sex lol its pretty obvious answer

[Sunssong]

Because it's hard. Humans love easy dopamine. Girls too.

[Berethor]

Hump and dump is something that a lot of animals do as well, and protection is artificial.

[LazerBean]

Because they are poorly parented and so many women today make it easy.

[LiamJHayden]

Why is that surprising? There is no necessary connection between wanting sex and being responsible. Teen boys want sex yet are usually notoriously irresponsible.

[Anonymous]

Legally speaking, men have reproductive responsibilities without reproductive rights. Women have all the reproductive rights, so they should also have the responsibilities that come with them.

[bamesjond0069]

Seems like common sense to me. Why are women so willing to have unprotected sex when they are the ones likely stuck with the most consequences?

[Paul09]

I'm desperate or a mental and physical connection. Sex is a bonus. A lot of men, Especially younger men, have zero control over themselves.

[Agape93]

Sex feels great, responsibility hurts.

[Anonymous]

Unprotected sex is just they guys' fault?

[NostalgiaSenpi]

Because you chose a bunch of dumbasses.

[Alex8736]

because they still act like babies