Why do I hurt other people?

[mattclark242]

why do I hurt other people? like I been getting mad so easy in the past few month and hurting other. I do not want hurt others.

it to the point that I don't feel safe being around others. cause I think I may go off on them and I do not mean to do it.

[SteveSmith1985]

This sounds like a genuine, real problem. This is straight-up going to be beyond the scope of anyone on GAG to properly help you with (myself included).

The fact that you're recognizing that this behavior is hurting others, and are also very much not wanting to be "going off" on people and hurting them; is so so key. That's excellent. That is... such a good mindset to be in compared to most people with similar issues.

This sounds like it's likely an "anger management" issue. Or perhaps "impulse control" but more likely it sounds like it's the anger part of things.

The fact that this is something which seems to be a recent development for you, is also encouraging. You're not someone who has been 'going off' on people you care about your whole life. It's not some deeply ingrained part of your personality (I would guess).

Whether this is something that just "developed" randomly, or whether its in response to some particular life-change I have no idea. But either way, what you need to do, is to seek out resources and groups for "anger management" (they totally exist if you do a little internet searching).

This is not an unknown phenomenon. I think most people who have issues with managing their anger are way worse off than you are. They are often unaware of the problem ("well of course I got angry! That shit pissed me of! Of course I got angry about that!") you are very aware of the problem. Also, many of those people DO have anger and rage as a deep-seated aspect of their personality.

This isn't hard to fix. But you do need to get in touch with the appropriate resources and do whatever work is required to "manage your anger" appropriately (as per... whatever those appropriate people instruct you to work on).

I think you're coming from the right place. I hope you connect with the right people to help you. Because... you're right... you don't want to be going around hurting people and then regretting your behavior. That's... no good.

And dude. Depending on who exactly you hurt, and how exactly you hurt them...

A sincere apology, and an explanation that you're not sure what's going on yet, but you're worried you may have some anger issues you're looking into fixing (or leave that part out if you want and just apologize on it's own)... goes a long fucking way. People are pretty forgiving if you sincerely acknowledge your behavior towards them was wrong. Maybe you can repair some of the damage already done too. 🙂