Why is he acting creepy, but when I try to talk to him, he leaves or do not respond?

[Anonymous]

This guy I know from university is acting strange. He would stare at me across the corridor and would stop when I catch him (it has happened multiple times). I ignored it because I thought that it is not harming, so why create a fuss.

But then one day I was finding my wallet in my backpack. He was standing really far and his friend (just say her name is Sara) was standing close to me. Both of them were having some loud conversation, some classfellow bumped me, and I lost my balance. I thought I bumped into Sara, but it was him.

He placed his arm on my upper back, I instantly apologized because it was my fault.

Now, he brushes past me multiple times. He would rub his shoulder against mine while walking past me.

Once, I was sitting on a chair in class and he rubbed his thigh against my arm.

Then, one day I was talking to my friend and my hand was at the top rail of my chair, he went to sit in the seat behind me. While doing that, he turned and touched his bum to my hand. He acted as if nothing happened.

One time I was sitting in the corner, and he somehow touched his body against my back. My whole group saw and was shocked and he acted as if there was not much space, and it was an accident.

We are also placed in the same lab group by my professor. He is in the good books of almost all the professors. He does nothing, and does not talk at all, he would just use his phone, and I was Okay with it as long as he was not bumping into me. Now I am extremely careful, even if I see him from afar, I ensure that I'm in a safe area.

With time the lab work was too much for me so told him that he should do his part in the lab. He did not reply to that, but started helping. Now, I can feel that he is still trying to accidentally touch me because his walk is so clumsy. He has tried two or three times but failed.

He has a lot of female friends, and he does not treat them this way. I don't know why he does it

[Anonymous]

Based on the behaviors you've described, it sounds like this person is engaging in inappropriate and potentially predatory behavior towards you. It's important to prioritize your safety and well-being and to take steps to protect yourself from further harm.

It's possible that this person may be targeting you specifically, or that they may have a pattern of behavior that they exhibit towards others. Regardless of the cause, it's important to take action to protect yourself and to communicate your boundaries clearly.

Here are some steps you can take to address the situation:

1. Document the behavior: Keep a record of any incidents or interactions with this person, including dates, times, and specific details of what occurred.

2. Communicate your boundaries: It's important to clearly communicate your boundaries to this person and to make it clear that their behavior is not acceptable. You can do this in person, via email, or by seeking the help of a supervisor, professor, or other authority figure.

3. Seek support: It's important to seek support from trusted friends, family members, or a therapist who can provide you with guidance and support as you navigate this situation.

4. Consider reporting the behavior: If the behavior continues or escalates, you may consider reporting it to the university's Title IX office or to the police.

It's important to remember that you are not at fault for this person's behavior, and that you have the right to feel safe and respected in all interactions.

[Asker]

Thank you, I will communicate this with my friends and confront him. But I'm sure he will act as if I'm overreacting and would bad-mouth me.

[Opinion Owner]

It's possible that he may try to downplay or deny his behavior or even bad-mouth you, but it's important to remember that you have the right to stand up for yourself and assert your boundaries.

It may be helpful to document any incidents of his behavior that make you feel uncomfortable or violate your boundaries, such as the times when he touched you without your consent. This can be helpful if you need to report him to your professor or university administration.

Remember that you are not responsible for his actions or reactions, and that you deserve to feel safe and respected in your academic environment. If you feel uncomfortable confronting him directly, consider reaching out to a trusted friend or a counselor for support.

[stratford]

Be careful.