What is the right attitude a guy should have after rejection?

Question

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

"Oh well. At least I know. Okay, on to the next one."

That's it. And this is what you should EXPECT, every single time. I say that because it's a HUGE mistake to have feelings for a girl and to pine away in the back ground for weeks, months, or even years, putting your life on hold as you emotionally invest in her in your own head, building up pressure on yourself that she could never live up to. No! If you have feelings for a girl, tell her, QUICKLY, that you'd like to go out with her or spend time with her. FIND OUT if she rejects this completely, or if she's willing to give it a shot - KNOWING that even if she accepts a date, that there's no guarantee from there.

The BEST thing that can happen is that you form a relationship. The SECOND-best thing that can happen is that you get rejected immediately. The THIRD-best thing that can happen is that she strings you along for a little while, maybe using you for free food/entertainment/status for a little while. The WOSRT thing that can happen is that you don't ask her, and so you WASTE YOUR TIME AND ENERGY on someone who doesn't even know you exist. NOTHING can be worse than that - and this is what happens by default! So, if you have feelings for a girl, literally ANYTHING is better than not asking her - INCLUDING being rejected! At least then you can move on right away.

So, EXPECT rejection, and by expecting it, you aren't going to be so hung up about being rejected. You'll be more relaxed and at ease, and are MORE likely to have your interest returned. And if you ARE rejected, you simply say "okay, thanks anyway" and it's over. Tomorrow, you can start looking for another girl.

NEVER, EVER, EVER just sit and dream about a (real) girl - just go tell her that you are interested and would she go on a date? Being shot down is SO much better than not knowing.

MisterKuulius · Accepted Answer

You survived before you ever met her. You will survive after she is gone.

Women are not as amazing as you build them up to be in your head. They all come with either some form of baggage or upkeep, and none of them are even close to perfect. Do you think the reason people break up all the time is for no reason? No, there's always something.

Think about it like this: women are not necessary to live a good life. If you find the right woman, it's a bonus. A woman who doesn't like you is not the right woman. Simple, right? The hardest part is controlling your feelings about it and not taking it personally, but you can do it!

Alternatively, you can become a better man to attract more women. With more women come more choices. With more choices, each rejection stings less than before. But it's up to you to decide if the effort is worth it or not. Honestly it's good to improve whether it gets you a woman or not. There is a reason people say things like, "the difficult things are the only things worth doing".

Puppystarfish23 · Accepted Answer

Keep it classy trust me I was rejected once and I didn't take it so well mainly because the guy kept playing with my feelings afterwards but I should have just ignored him and realised he wasn't meant to be with me.

Just see it as another stepping stone to finding someone really great. Just think to yourself "okay so they don't like me well at least I can move on now and find someone new"

Jazzy54 · Accepted Answer

A positive one. It may takes some time to rebound, but he’ll eventually find someone else and the feelings will be mutual. 😊

coachTanthony · Answer

REPEAT AFTER ME: I would rather be rejected and understood than ambiguous in my actions.

Effably · Answer

What type of rejection?

If we're assuming a typical you asking a girl oit and her saying no? In that case I think the golden rule is to accept it and not let it change your view of her.

That is to say, since you thought she was good for you before, she's still pretty awesome. And so if this was a cold approach type of situation (if anyone does those for anything except growing a pair) I'd go with some variation of "Thanks anyway, I had to ask. Didn't want to go on my day wondering what if. Have a great day.". Its blunt enough, respectful and honestly acting on your own desires without being desperate is often very attractive. More than one might change their mind.

dynamicyandere · Answer

Shrug it off, like water off a duck’s back. Stay positive, stay confident, keep your mojo. Keep going on with your day and don’t let that rejection make you shine any less brighter.

Let that rejection be like sprinkling water onto a roaring bonfire. Keep burning bright. Keep doing you. Continue to dance to the best of your own drum with or without their approval. ☀️

The irony is that by carrying yourself this way, you’ll only become more attractive. What’s arguably more attractive than having the confidence to approach is having the confidence to handle rejection like a champ.

SomeGuyCalledTom · Answer

If he has a good attitude BEFORE a rejection occurs, the immediate aftermath should take care of itself. If he goes in with bad attitude or unrealistic expectations, then it almost doesn't matter how he reacts to the rejection, because he's already allowed himself to be negatively influenced in his perceptions and behaviors by emotional factors he lacked the maturity to consider. Garbage in, garbage out. Men who get all toxic in the face of rejection didn't have their headspacd "all there" right until that critical moment. Men who react badly to rejection have deeper issues going on that manifest from a deeper place than the particulars of any given interaction.

Steelcore5280 · Answer

Don't bother asking women our or anything, dude. Focus on yourself and improve your life and you as a man altogether. Women will outright reject you, even if they like you, because it gives them a massive ego boost, as they know that there are guys who want them, and they LOVE the attention. They also play the game of "who can reject the most men" when they're out in public together as a group, seeing who can reject the most men in one night. Your feelings don't matter to them. This is something I learned early on, and it was a good lesson to learn, even if it was one I didn't like at first. Keep your head high and improve your life as a man, brother.

Luopio27 · Answer

Love is a paradox. At least to me. Those I am atracted to, are not atracted to me snd vice versa. Rejection is inevitable for me because Im not in love with anything more than the looks.

Im fucked up. As a veteran of rejections, all I can say is try not to get emotionslly attached, try not to care too much, try not to put her on pedestals, try not to see yourself as inferior and her superior. Trynot to like her too much before she says and means I love you.

We can always try but never may we succeed in matters put of our own hands. Im just an old fool hoping to be wise.

Lionman95 · Answer

Accept it and move on.
If she doesn´t want you don´t dig deep in the why. That doesn´t mean a guy shouldn´t reflect on why she might have say no but the goal shouldn´t be that you lose your work and social life over her.
There are many other women and there will always be more people that say no to you than will say yes.

ShadezMcgee · Answer

Smile and move on. You had the balls to try, and even though you failed you will get a yes at some point and it will be second nature the more you go for it.

Billlewis · Answer

I always try to learn as much as possible from the experience, and renew my focus on the one thing that matters more than anything else -- how best to please the superior female.

Jackblue · Answer

Well, I mean just accept it at the time, obviously you are going to be disappointed but try to keep a straight face. If you are going to cry or get angry about it that is fine, but do so later in private, not in front of the woman

RockyHammock · Answer

Play it off lightly to kill the tension. The worst way you could respond is through anger, manipulation, or resentment.

Anonymous · Answer

Head up, smile on your face, and reiterate the compliment you gave her. Not every woman is gonna like you, but that doesn't mean you're not good enough. Act a fool, and you show all the ladies just how immature you are. Show some class.

Nikki1989 · Answer

It is not how quickly you get knocked down, but how quickly you get up again.

Ironic_Method · Answer

There could be a million reasons why they're not into you, doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you (but we should all try and be better). Fortunately there are a million more out there.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Smile, be polite, and move on. I've had girls actually change their minds immediately just because I did not have a bad attitude about her saying "no."

Capricornunicorn92 · Answer

Move on to the next one. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

Vegasrunner · Answer

One step closer to success. No man in the history of the world has ever been successful without being rejected at some time in his life.

Still-alive · Answer

wish her well in life respect her choice and move on. don't sulk about it, guilt trip her, get angry, nada. leave with a smile on your face with confidence. boom.

AdithyaR · Answer

Understand that it's not personal, it's not an attack or insult against you. Then move on.

KrisKris81 · Answer

Just move on. In my experience women will respect you more if you shoot your shot and get rejected than if you just stand there and drool at them.

Anonymous · Answer

Next! If you feel the need pay it forwards and reject 19 other women as payback. But either way, move on. There's a billion other women on the planet she ain't special.

ImalwaysrightOK · Answer

My guess would be act like it's no big deal, then brood in private.

Sparkie460 · Answer

Just brush yourself off and move on. So what you got rejected. It's not the end of the world.

Anonymous · Answer

Sometimes rejection is the God's protection. So be humble and digest it.

dragoblack · Answer

Acceptance. You got rejected, you should be able to just accept it and go on with your life

WonderSadness · Answer

To accept it and feel sad of course and focus on his studies until he finds another girl

Skyros · Answer

Emboldened because it means that person was not meant for him.

Anonymous · Answer

Shrug your shoulders and move on treating the woman with indifference.

Fes13 · Answer

Although a shocker, you can continue being alive

AaronKrieger · Answer

Rub some dirt on it and walk it off

LovingJo · Answer

Learn from why, and move on to the next...

exitseven · Answer

Get right back up on the horse

TacosRAwesome · Answer

Aaa well shit happens kind of attitude.

AsaKyo · Answer

Just take the loss and move on

imawfulatusernames · Answer

Acceptance. Leave us tf alone

SweetTwistedSatanist · Answer

"You win some you lose some. To the next."

Sasha0426 · Answer

Not where he wants to harm you or worse.

SAMI_DABBAB · Answer

Gym and revenge

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

Push her in front of a train

Anonymous · Answer

He can get high

Jamie05rhs · Answer

"Next!"

What is the right attitude a guy should have after rejection?

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