Why is my boyfriend's friend is weird around me?

[mekimeki]

my boyfriend lives with two flat mates. one of them has become a good friend of mine but one of them doesn't likes me. i don't have any problem with him not liking me but when it first bothered me i asked him straight way do you have some problem with me? he said neither do i like you nor do i hate you. initially i thought i am the delusional one but now if i am hanging out with him and his friends. whatever i talk for fun he tries to make it in a way that i am trying to harm someone by that or trying to break their friendship. he used to stare at my boobs too. once we all went out and he kept of taking my boyfriend away from me. later my boyfriend noticed it and then he also said the same thing. recently when we all went out he kept on staring at me weirdly. he once swore at me too. whatever i do he tries to make it against me and he keeps on staring at me weirdly i don't like it at all, the way he stares at me or his attitude. when my boyfriend wore my hair tie on his wrist he said such a lame thing you are doing. when we all talk i did not take his side many times instead took other flatmate's side. this time boyfriend also said he was looking at you weirdly then i told him throughout the outing he was staring at me.

[Anonymous]

Trying to figure out why he acts that way towards you is a can of worms you don’t want or need to open. You have a boyfriend to be your focal point, you don’t need to win over or understand his friends. My boyfriend also has a friend who he’d known for 8 years before meeting me. The guy has always been unpleasant to me compared to the other friends, but who cares? I just chop it up to him being mad that a woman has invaded their friendship dynamic and brush it off. I’m not out to please any man but mine. If you’re uncomfortable then express that to your boyfriend and tell him you’d rather not hang around that person too much. Problem solved.

[mekimeki]

yeah i told him but it is difficult to not to because he is part of the group.

[Opinion Owner]

I get it, my boyfriends friend is literally his bestie, I see this man all the time. When i go over, if he comes out with us, all that. I know our relationship isn’t great but it just doesn’t need to be. I’m not hanging out with him, I’m hanging out with my man. You’ve got to keep things in perspective, not be sensitive if a guy doesn’t like you. There’s gonna be people who don’t mesh well with you and that’s ok, you don’t have to be all tight and super cool with the dude if he has no interest in doing that mutually. For me, when the guy is around I’ll text my friends, watch tv, make a friend at the bar, talk with my boyfriend solely, I keep my chat with the friend to very minimum. He makes no efforts to better our connection so why should I care? Why should you?

[spartan55]

@mekimeki
This is great advice. 👍

[mekimeki]

Yeah I don't tall to others much. I ignore every bullshit like that. It's just he mentioned it to me.

[spartan55]

There is always that one friend right? Assuming your boyfriend won't put an end to his friend's bullshit you have two choices: kill the guy with kindness (which, if done right will make him look stupid) OR just pretend he doesn't exist.
I don't know what type of person you are, that will determine which route you take.

[mekimeki]

Ignore it.

[spartan55]

Hopefully that will work. He sounds like a shithead.

[FilmGuy93]

Sounds like he just doesn’t like your vibe. He might just be a weird dude in general. Most guys have that one friend who is just… off. Off is really the only way to describe it

[Billlewis]

He may have the hots for you, or he may be trying very hard not to upset you or your boyfriend. I'm just guessing, though.

[mekimeki]

I don't know he always stares at me weirdly, he acts rudely with me, even my boyfriend said only his way of staring is icky, other guys don't do it.

[Billlewis]

Then he probably does desire you. That may be a nice turn on for you -- knowing that your boyfriend's buddy wants to be with you so bad... and he can't:)

[mekimeki]

no it disgusts me.

[mekimeki]

why would someone even think like that?

[Billlewis]

Guys have sexual urges that are absolutely ravenous, and we can sometimes become practically obsessed with a beautiful woman, especially if we see her frequently, such as at a job, or apparently in your case, a friendship.
I feel bad now, for suggesting that you might enjoy driving him crazy. Sorry for bringing that up.

[mekimeki]

tbh i just hope nothing sort of this type he has for me. it's ok. it's just i don't like the way he stares, i am kinda socially anxious person so that makes me super duper uncomfertable.

[Rockstarrrrr]

Dude has so much feminine energy lol... If you don't like it, you and your boyfriend just be vocal about it... Tell him to stop acting like a c*nt lol...

[mekimeki]

yeah we are trying to maintain distance that's it for now.

[Rockstarrrrr]

👍👍

[Wild_princess]

Do you think i has crush on you?

[mekimeki]

yeah i do think.
but i don't wanna assume it.

[Wild_princess]

Well make him clear ofcourse indirectly that you are taken

[In_Trance]

He's bored

[mekimeki]

i guess do, i just try to avoid him but his behavior is always icky.