Have you ever fallen for someone other than your wife post-marriage? What was that like? What were you thinking while going through it?

[Anonymous]

[Lliam]

I had 7 different girlfriends (beginning at age 16) before I met my wife at age 40. I fell into infatuation with all of them.

There was only one that I fell deeply in love with. She loved me, too. I was 36 and she was 30 at the time. We lived together for over a year. For reasons that I can't explain, it turned out that we could have made it as life-long partners and we eventually separated.

For a few months, it constantly felt like I had been kicked in the stomach to the point where I sometimes felt nauseous. When alone, there were times when I doubled over and bawled. It took me over a year to pull myself together and move on with my life.

So yes, I fell for other women before I met my wife. It was wonderful. Those were peak experiences. I don't regret a thing.

[Lliam]

I'm sorry, you said "post" marriage. My wife and I have been married now or almost 26 years and I have never fallen for anyone else but her during that time. She's wonderful and I would never hurt her. We trust each other completely.

But I never got over that one girlfriend I mentioned. She found me on Facebook 20 years after we separated. We even spoke on the phone a few times. Hearing her voice again was magical. She was living out of state.
I was overjoyed to be in touch, just to know what she was up to, that she was doing well and pursuing her dreams.
Five years later, I read that she had died from a sudden medical problem at the age of 55. I was devastated. A bright light in the world had been extinguished. There is a hole in my heart that will never heal. I will always love her and will never forget her. But my love for her and my gratitude for the time we spent together doesn't diminish the love I have for my wife.

[Asker]

Thank you for both the before and after thoughts. I enjoyed reading them

[Lliam]

Thank you. 🤗