What are possible reasons you accept your workmate follow request but didn't follow back?

[LovingLoverReturned]

I get along with all my workmates and am always trying to cheer them up. I have made him laugh before. But he is the quietest workmate and he doesn't try to engage convo with anyone except those from his country. He follows back workmates from different countries though all who also follow me. It was today I sent the request and he accepted. I'm wondering if he doesn't like me 🙃

If you did what he did would it mean you dislike a person? And why let someone you dislike follow you?

[CaptainOverthink]

Maybe he just isn't that interested in whatever you are posting. Don't have to mean much if anything really.
Besides, you don't need everyones approval do you? Even if you do get them, you don't really know if they like you anyhow. Just do 'you'.

[LovingLoverReturned]

he's never seen my posts because they are private. He follows the other workmates who also have private accounts... itsnt that's fishy?

[CaptainOverthink]

Maybe and you might be right, he very well might be judging you. It might be superficially or it might be in the way you've behaved with others, if he's not talking much, then he probably is watching and listening, I mean it in a non-creepy way ofc.

It might mean nothing in the long run though. If you push people to like you then you'll push some away too because it don't feel natural. And some people are just biased against popular people.

Maybe you'll just do better with him if you give it time and act like there's nothing wrong with him. If he is as observant as quiet people usually are then he might sense your insecurity about him. If he overthinks on that then it can get awkward real fast.
What I am saying is that by you overthinking this.. you won't make it better, you'll just affirm your own worries.

-----

Are the other coworkers female? If no then..
Do he have a girlfriend? - if yes, then maybe she wouldn't like it.

[LovingLoverReturned]

Hmm push people to like me, nah. Yes he follows other female coworkers. I leave him alone. It's possible he was interuptted while on instagram and doesn't actually use it much, and so didn't follow but still as I was saying it Takes a se ind the follow back button is automatically there. I'll probably just u follow him if I conclude he thinks he's too good for me.

[LovingLoverReturned]

Second*

[CaptainOverthink]

Or you don't need to do anything, why assume anything when you don't know.
The possibilities are endless as to why this has happened, assuming it's because he don't like you and then responding in kind, will surely make it worse.
Like said, no point in overthinking this.
🙂

[LovingLoverReturned]

It's not an assumption. It's a hunch. And this is gag a place you can ask about guy's behaviour. So I am gathering different opinions. You understand now?

[CaptainOverthink]

Okay. Uncalled for attitude there.. I was countering you with my opinion, this is gag, a place I go to give my opinions and try to help out. Has the opinion arrived yet?

[CaptainOverthink]

Hey, I'm sorry.
I stooped down a level there, I regret what I said. Comment-sections have a way of bringing out the worst attitude in people.

And I get that I made an assumption about your reasons for gathering opinions and assumed that it was because you were concerned not everyone liked you, so I warned not to be pushy, I didn't mean to insult you. I could have worded that better.

Peace?

[LovingLoverReturned]

Peace, indeed

[spartan55]

Good lord honey, it hasn't even been 24 hours yet. I think you are conflating social media with reality and taking it WAY too seriously.

[LovingLoverReturned]

I like your comment but😂 I'm simply using gag to ask anything on my mind. Not about to add him to my enemy list. When you accept a request it has an automatic follow back pop up so it takes no time.

[spartan55]

Again, give it more than under 24 hours. He may not care too much about that stuff. I don't understand where you are getting the idea he doesn't like you. Following someone on social media has NOTHING to do with liking them or not. Again, you are treating social media like it's real society, which is absurd. Not everyone is going to like you throughout your life.

[LovingLoverReturned]

I don't mind if he doesn't like me. I just would like to know if many others think that. And then if I conclude he thinks he's too good for me, I'll take him out of my space. Social media is a mental reality and vwry much reflect real emotions.
It seems I was singled out because he follows back everyone else but I'll give it some time. My social media is a small space where I mainly invite people I consider family, I do consider my team family. Our lead was reflecting simular feelings, everyone else does... except he never speaks on that so I don't know

[spartan55]

Like I said. You are taking it too seriously and giving it far too much value.

[LovingLoverReturned]

Hmm? I have no plans in place concerning this matter. I don't plan to do anything besides duwcuss the phenomenon on Gag, the perfect place for such discussions on behaviour

[spartan55]

Plans in place? Wtf are you talking about?

[LovingLoverReturned]

You said in taking it too serious. So you must think I have plans. Surely asking a question isn't taking it too seriously. Maybe if I carried a gun to work and shut up the place (rolls my eye). It's remote work anyhow.

[spartan55]

So, it's remote work and you are bent out of shape about it? This is you won't see much, correct? Yeah, you are asking a question, about a follow request on social media, with a coworker you seldom see. I guess if you really think this is important...🙄

[LovingLoverReturned]

You seem to be blowing a simple question out of proportion 🤷‍♀️

[LovingLoverReturned]

This is not a question about me and my values. It's about your "opinion" on this "guys behaviour" ... welcome to Gag

[spartan55]

I didn't talk about your values anywhere so, again, no idea what you are talking about.
Opinion on the guy's behavior? He doesn't doesn't feel like it, doesn't like you, doesn't give gaf, any of the above, all of the above.
I mean, why can't you just ask him? Team is family, right? You won't do it because you know how ridiculous the whole thing is.

[LovingLoverReturned]

i never thought of asking him. i dont want to come across as confrontational but i don't think its ridiculous to asl someone if they dislike me in this situation... as I said the guy is strange (not necessarily in a bad way, ... but in the sense that he doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve, he barely interacts with anyone except those from his country, so I feel I know him less) , he may be conservative but I'm not sure (the other workmates from the same country are not conservative) so I
1) dont want to possibly embarrass him by asking him among others
2) dont want to private messsge him incase he doesn't speak in private casually to strange women
Conversations are a normal thing but not to everyone

[LovingLoverReturned]

I've rarely had an opportunity alone with him, and especially not recently. But a natural one is more acceptable than a created one (DM /private message)... if indeed he is conservative.

[spartan55]

You say I am blowing this out of proportion? Think you are projecting because you are tied in knots over a stupid social media follow. The fact that you believe it REALLY means he doesn't like you is just mind boggling. Not everyone takes social media so seriously and let's it dictate their feelings. Especially guys. Go ahead 'confront' him. He will think you are crazy.

[LovingLoverReturned]

You seem to be hallucinating. It's pretty simple to me, but all you see are toes knots. I never said I was going to confront anyone. YOU suggested that. You are more bothered about this than I am. I asked a simple question.

[roy_ricky09]

Maybe he doesn't want you to see what he follows...
But it has nothing to do with someone liking you or not.

[LovingLoverReturned]

You mean he is afraid of what my profile might look like? Which is private. Since I do follow him.. but he doesn't mw

[roy_ricky09]

Could be. But that doesn't matter. You have the access to the guy why worry about social media.

[boggboss]

No it just means he dont really care enough to accept you not accepting is a natural stance not dislike

[LovingLoverReturned]

Huh? He did accept my follow request. . This was a question about why he might not hsve followed back

[kinggeorge007]

Probably just an introvert who likes to keep things to himself and want to keep work away from life. Because I'm the same. Nobody at work requested me and I didn't request anyone either.

[LovingLoverReturned]

Nah. The description reveals he follows back all the other workmates that follow him.

[In_Trance]

I don't mind if they look at the things I post, but they post absolute garbage I have no interest in. I'm not following garbage no matter who it is

[LovingLoverReturned]

My account is private...

[In_Trance]

Lol why would i request to follow when I don't see what you post?

[LovingLoverReturned]

Lol I'm talking about my workmate, who has indeed requested to follow other private accounts.

[LovingLoverReturned]

And now follows

[In_Trance]

To each their own

[Andres77]

I always keep work in social circles separate.