What is going through his mind, please help?

[Anonymous]

There is a guy at my gym who stares and smiles. I was too shy to smile back and would quickly look away. He often found me looking over. His friend would even grin in my direction on seeing me. Then the guy started to become hostile and stare at me and look really annoyed. So, I would just stare back and on one occasion, I giggled because it was so awkward. The next day he started smiling and going out his way to look over. We started casually smiling again. He was always next to me or in eye view. I was working out to some guys and looked up at another, the ‘guy’ was watching me with a hostile look. So I smiled and then went and worked out next to his friends. He would occasionally look at me with a really annoyed expression. Then I saw him the following day. He completely ignored me. His friend smiled with a knowing smile. God knows what.

Does this guy actually like me and has been acting jealous and expecting me to be more forward, as he has been the one predominately smiling, is he confused or game playing? He does seem genuinely annoyed but is so friendly with every other person. He even moved behind his car when I saw him looking at me from outside. Serious replies only. Weird as we have had minimum convo but non verbals are so powerful.

thank you ❤️

Updates

9 mo

That’s the reason for this forum to gain advice on the opposite sex. Not all men think alike and neither do women. But, we do appreciate opinions and valid input.

That very guy could be on here posting a similar question, hence the anonymity. I know he’s probably not though.

[teamvic]

Hmmm the annoyed part is odd but I will tell you this, if it were me I wouldn't be doing so much eye contact and staring if the girl was ugly. So there is a good chance he could be into you. Whether it's for a relationship or just to fuck. There's something there. And him and his friend have definitely talked about you🤔

I dont know maybe he doesn't wanna approach cause you always hear online how girls hate being approached while working out🤔 if you really wanna know just approach him first, do some small talk and then see what he does the following days.🤔

[Asker]

Thank you so much for your reply. I appreciate someone taking the time to give some validation.

[D_Bone_Steak]

He's trying to figure out how to delete you without leaving behind DNA evidence and how to dispose of the body.

[Asker]

Haha…very likely. The way things are going, that’s for sure. Hiding behind his car when I clock him staring. The mind boggles…you’re probably right

[D_Bone_Steak]

😂 🤣 yeah... As they say, hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. It's also quite possible it's just yet another dude that's scared of women, yet drawn to them due to biology.

[Dkc123]

How old are u? This is teenage stuff mostly.

[Asker]

Age isn’t a thing when you’re avoidant attachment like me. Plus out the dating game, and have only been in serious relationships where the guys have basically had to tell me to my face that they are interested. 35 years too old.

[Dkc123]

Yes it is.. generally.. if you're 35 then its middle age on average.. coz average human life is around or under 70..

If want your chemistry to move forward u need to be direct and I just meant that..

[Asker]

I wish I was that confident and probably give off the wrong vibes because I am so shy around guys I have an attraction to. In the past I’ve been told that they think I’m not that interested or game playing. I’m so hot and cold then when I’m actually dating the person, it’s some sort of validation that they actually like me. The signs are there with him but then I doubt myself and get in my own head. Not good, I know. It’s so much easier on a night out. So much easier to talk to guys.

[Dkc123]

At least smile give some singals.. curl your behind your ears.. if he's not giving it back even after 2 or 3 times then just focus on the workout.

[Asker]

I will, I’m not planning on going back for a good week. I am getting better at smiling back. He’ll probably just ignore me for a bit then act jealous when a guy is near by then he will start smiling again. The pattern. Weird but not any weirder than my behaviour at the moment. Thank you :)

[BarryLiverstone]

I don’t know

[Asker]

Well, if you’re a man and you don’t know…what does that say?

[BarryLiverstone]

It says I’m not a mind reader and that all men don’t think alike

[BarryLiverstone]

Why ask this question anonymously?

[BarryLiverstone]

If the same guy was here then he could read the question and know you are asking about him. So not a valid reason to ask anon

[BarryLiverstone]

Re-reading your question it’s likely he has talked about you with his friend and they have made fun of you. He knows you look at him but you haven’t said hi

[Asker]

Mmmmm…. I’m sure he is not a mind reader either and these types of questions have probably been asked multiple times. So, I would assume he wouldn’t read it and think ahhhhh…. that’s about me. If I wasn’t anonymous he would then know it was about him.

[BarryLiverstone]

Not only are these types of questions asked multiple times by dif people; often the same person will ask the same question over and over again on gag which breaks the rules

[Asker]

Irrelevant response. I have asked this once and do not plan to ask it again. I haven’t used this site for 6 years. Maybe take your wealth of knowledge to someone who will actually benefit from it. Thank you

[BarryLiverstone]

And.. this is why I am trying to stop answering anon questions. I spent 15 min reading, then re-reading her question and have been honest with my answers.

[BarryLiverstone]

My best guess based on the question details is the guy is making fun of you. But if that’s irrelevant then good luck

[Asker]

I would be inclined to think you were right in your opinion but considering he was the one that went out his way to get my attention and be near me. Sometimes I wouldn’t go for a week at a time and he would still be staring over or in the vicinity. I would clock him staring at me. I’m sorry that’s how life has treated you which causes you to evidently think worst.

I hope it gets better for you, I really do. As you said you are not a mind reader and some men are more mature than to make fun of women just because they are in the same environment. I even know that’s not case. You’re obviously a bullying type of personality that would rather be mean than give no opinion at all. Even if I thought that I would never say it to someone. It is unkind and unjust. You initially said you don’t know but now come back with the negativity. Well done!!!

[BarryLiverstone]

I’ve been bullied. I’m tired as I worked until 5:00 am and only had like 4 hrs of sleep. I tried to give you an answer after your update asking for a perspective. Did you want me to say that he likes you?

[Asker]

We live in a world where people are unkind and mental health is so prevalent. So, if I took your views on bored and my mental health was completely debilitating. I would be feeling awful about myself. If that’s what your aim is, then I feel very sorry for you. I hope you have a lovely day/evening wherever you are.

[Asker]

*board

[Asker]

You said ‘I don’t know’, not really worth an entry. I am sorry you have been bullied and I cannot imagine how difficult that could have been. But some of us are kind and caring and do not all have mistrusting perceptions of events. Maybe rethink before you type an entry or just don’t reply.

[BarryLiverstone]

If you had failing mental health you would already feel bad about yourself. A random persons answer on a free website wouldn’t be the cause. I have lied to people in the past to try and make them feel better. Was told that lying is wrong and to be honest. Would you rather be lied to?

[BarryLiverstone]

Me saying “I don’t know” is what caused you to think I am bullying you? I’m confused. Often times on gag people type and long question and don’t really ask what they intend to ask until we engage in a conversation. I’ve been wiling to do that and give the male perspective

[Asker]

I don’t feel bad, I feel empathy for you. The world is not always toxic. My mental health is on point. I just was looking for an opinion in my confused little mind. You are wrong…trolls have been the cause of many suicides. Anyway this is off point. Take care

[BarryLiverstone]

God bless. Glad I’m not a troll then. I have posted in good faith, you can see my profile and all my answers

[Asker]

Haha…you saying he is making fun of me with his friends, now that’s just mean. Maybe how your mind thinks…maybe you’re a little paranoid and think the worst. That’s ok too.

[BarryLiverstone]

Read your question. You said that you stared at him multiple times but you never talked to him. That’s awkward, that’s not welcoming. One response to that behavior is to make fun of it. You said his friend also grinned which confirms they talked about you

[BarryLiverstone]

Anyway I’m done, gotta go to the beach with friends. Peace