Hanging out with my guy friend?

[sarahf23]

So I’ve been talking to this guy and he asked me to hang out with him Thursday and I was like sure what time. He replied so I was like “ okay sounds good! What’s the plan?” Was that a bad response because he has not responded yet it’s been 7 hours 😬

[DaveJord]

No, I think that is an appropriate response. So, for me first dates are the hardest to come up with... because there are like 10 things I would like to do with a woman. But until you get past the first date, it's hard to get a woman to commit to something to adventurous.

But he asked you to hang out, so until he response to you then there is nothing else you should do about it. If he is not having a more in-depth conversation about it with you... then it's on all him.

[sarahf23]

That’s true we’ve hung out like 2 times I just don’t understand why he takes forever to respond to messages. It’s a huge turn off

[DaveJord]

As it should be, I do not tolerate it from women either.

[sarahf23]

What do you think I should do? Sit and wait for a response or forget about it?

[DaveJord]

I will say this if you have hung out with him before, and it has not advanced beyond just hanging out... like its not highschool anymore and you are 34 years old. 34-year-old don't just hang out.

[DaveJord]

So here is the thing as a guy. Now I am just telling you how guys in general think... all these other dudes will say how wrong I am... but trust me I know how dudes think.

So, as woman I would forget about this guy, and if respones to me latter with anything other then what I want to hear from him I would not reply to him. But if you take any action and react out to him first... he is going to think you are totally into him and that he is going to score with you.

Now if that is what you want, then reply to him. If that is not what you want... forget this guy.

[sarahf23]

Your right I just really liked him. That’s why I do know what to do

[sarahf23]

That’s why I don’t know what to do ^

[DaveJord]

Right you totally like him... so he on some level probally knows or has some clue that you might. So now you are asking yourself is this person testing me? Are they messing with me? Whats the deal?

The deal is simple, you can never make assumptions about someone when it comes to datine. That means you should never assume the worst of someone, but at the same time you can never assume the best of someone. You literally can not make any assumptions.

What you can do, is this. The one thing you know beyond a doubt is how he makes you feel when he does what he does. So, no matter how much you like him, do not dismiss how he makes you feel when he does what he does... and if it does not make you feel good then forget it.

[DaveJord]

34 year old man asking a woman 34 year old woman to hang out together. Then 7 hours to reply to follow up date... dude sounds like a player who is playing games.

Hang out... like how immature is this guy. No, I don't want to hang out, are you asking out on date or are you still in high Scholl because I am a grown woman. You tell me as woman you want to hang out, I am thinking that means lets hookup.

[sarahf23]

He probably does just wanna hook up. Because why else is he taking so long to reply

[DaveJord]

You cannot assume that... but so never assume the best or the worst of anyone.

Trust your gut and go with your instincts. If you do not like the way he is treating you, then move on.

[sarahf23]

You’re totally right but he just makes me feel like I did something wrong because everything was going good and now he ask to hang out and doesn’t respond to anything

[DaveJord]

Its classic women do it all the time, and it could be for any reason and you would never really know why. So do not spin your wheels on it. Move on. It still stings and its super annoying but move on. You know how his actions make you feel, now that could be his fault or yours, but it don't matter honestly. You feel the way you feel, so take responsibility for that and move on.

[sarahf23]

Yes I’m just going to move on cause I find it really weird that he was so down to hang out and now he’s not responding

[HippoDino]

I think he might want to have sex with you, but doesn't want to say his plan is to fuck you so he would rather pretend he has no plan, so then he can just say lets just hang out. Or he just has really bad texting etiquette I don't know.

[sarahf23]

Cause he was like let’s hang out at 7:30 and that was all. like did he mean go to his place or something. Cause he didn’t give any details

[HippoDino]

Thats what I'm saying, his plan might be to just "hangout" which means he doesn't want to go get food and walk around a park or something. He most likely wants to fuck you and just doesn't want to say that in the message so he ignores it.

[HippoDino]

Regardless of his intent though you asking for a plan is normal, him not responding is not normal behavior

[sarahf23]

I just at least thought If he wanted to fuck me he would invite me over. He’s invited me over before and we watched a movie and made out

[sarahf23]

Like he could be like “ wanna just come over and watch a movie again” but he hasn’t said anything

[HippoDino]

Yeah im not sure, its disrespectful to say the least

[sarahf23]

Exactly maybe I should just leave him alone

[HippoDino]

What happened on the date, was i right thinking he just wanted to hang out?

[sarahf23]

He still hasn’t texted me back yet

[sarahf23]

I guess he’s going to wait until tomorrow when we are supposed to be hanging

[HippoDino]

Well he sounds kind of lame, ignoring someone is a red flag for sure.

[sarahf23]

Literally so lame because even if he wanted to have sex with me he’s not even trying lol

[In_Trance]

What do you mean you've been talking to him and he hasn't responded for 7 hours?
You're just standing there in front of him and nobody's saying anything?

[sarahf23]

Talking meaning “ texting “

[sarahf23]

He hasn’t responded to my text and it’s been 7 hours

[In_Trance]

So did you call him?

[sarahf23]

I’m not gonna call him if he doesn’t respond to my texts

[In_Trance]

Then you need to take a good look around you at what's happening right now.
You can't expect different results if you're not willing to change

[sarahf23]

That’s so weird for me to call him if he’s obviously ignoring my texts

[In_Trance]

I guess that depends on how bad you want something to happen

[sarahf23]

Not that bad I’m not chasing after him lol. I’m 100% sure he saw my texts but not responding

[Billlewis]

Can you call him now?

[sarahf23]

Why would I call him