What does a guy mean when he says he is incapable of love?

Question

CalmUntilAbused · Accepted Answer

My first bet would be that He simply got emotionally hurt one time too many and thus rejects the idea of love in order not to get hurt anymore. It might also include developing some deep-rooted hatred towards the society and the concept of love that could make Him a threat to anyone close enough to Him, and as He's aware of this condition, He's deliberately pushing people away.

Another option is that He's aware that He does not comprehend the concept of love for some reason, and therefore claims He is incapable of proper love (which might actually be the other way round), and if the person You're asking about is close in age to You, I'd say this option might even be more likely than the first one.

The last option I see is that He's simply trying to be edgy (but I would be mighty careful with such accusations, I think most men these days got emotionally hurt at least a few times, and we can never truly know another human's breaking point).

WindAtMyBack · Accepted Answer

I think a lot of people are like that. They really don't know how to love someone, or are not capable of it. It might be because of how they were raised, like in a family that didn't have love, which is pretty common. Or things happened outside the home as they grew up. It might be they were hurt, and unable to get over it. Or maybe they were the one who hurt someone, and didn't want to hurt anyone else. Maybe they are toxic and know they are toxic. Maybe they are negative, or degrading, and don't want to inflict that on someone.

So it could be a lot of things. That doesn't mean the person is right in saying they are not capable of love. But they think they are, and they might be right.

ALSO - it could be a manipulative thing to say. Like fishing for sympathy.

HappyWoman34 · Accepted Answer

That he’s incapable of love-whether it’s due to mental illness, brain injury or autism. Any of these can cause a lack of emotion and secure attachment, if severe enough. Look up personality disorders and autism and schizophrenia and acquired brain injury.

LaFemmeFatale_1 · Accepted Answer

He has probably been hurt in the past and he thinks he can’t fall in love. He can and he will fall in love if he finds someone trustworthy, safe, honest and dependable.

coachTanthony · Answer

It's a cowards way of saying to you he's incapable of loving you because he's not into you. So he makes up this poor excuse of how wounded he is because his ego also likes the attention he gets from you.

Static_In_The_Attic · Answer

Anything this is possible & it’s possible be got burned in a past relationship or it is possible that he is brushing you off as well.

lightbulb27 · Answer

his heart is broken.. living in fear and/or shame.

BullShark · Answer

Depends on what context he's said this. He could still be heartbroken over that one girl whom he loved but she stabbed him in the back and cheated on him, so he thinks he's unlovable, and he's given up on love entirely. Maybe he's still figuring out his own feelings and whether or not he's ready for something as heavy as a romantic relationship with someone, which speaking from personal experience, is also something I'm experiencing. If you truly care about someone, the last thing you want to do is say yes to them when you yourself are unsure of your own feelings and lure them into a false sense of belief.

HawkPerception · Answer

Everyone is capable as love. If a guy says that it means he was hurt in a past relationship and doesn't want to experience being hurt again or he isn't attracted to you romantically and is trying to say it in a way to not hurt you. Either that or both of those.

AMS700CX4u2 · Answer

There are a few conditions that do demonstrate difficulties with showing emotional connectivity. Sociopaths have difficulty with relationships, children of alcoholics have been ignored for the sake of a bottle, They were counting on their parents attendance to an occasion which was important to them and of course that parent never showed. How many times does your emotions have to be thown in the dumpster until you build an emotional callus to protect yourself.

Lionman95 · Answer

That he feels overcharged by thought of having a relationship. He thinks he can have a relationship because he can´t meet the expectations that come with it.

hotwheelz78 · Answer

HE MEANS HE IS TRYING TO GET LAID AND NOT BE BOTHERED WITH RELATIONSHIPS... MEN ARE EVOLUTIONARILY DESIGNED TO WANT TO "SPREAD OUR SEED", WHERE AS WOMEN (BEING THE ONES TO BEAR THE CHILDREN) SEEK OUT RELATIONSHIPS WITH COMMITMENT... BUT SOME MEN DON'T KNOW HOW TO GET LAID WITHOUT BEING A COMPLETE JERK...

rachel776 · Answer

that great new country hit, Incapable of Love

Kaamraj · Answer

Three things. 1. He's been devastated previously so extremely hesitant. 2. He's a psychopath and being honest about it. 3. He's lying and doesn't want a relationship with you.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

He means "don't get your hopes up, because I'll use you and lose you the instant you stop serving my needs."

Ironic_Method · Answer

It means he thinks he's incapable of love. And emo.

Fromdusktilldawn · Answer

Probably a traumatic experience that hurt his capability to trust/open up to someone

Coolcow245 · Answer

He just not into u like that is what he means cuz if he liked u, he would risk it all for u

_Bernadette_ · Answer

Okay, so when a guy says he is incapable of love, it means he is incapable of love... :D

Sweetmilk7822 · Answer

It’s possible that somewhere along the way, he was damaged or hurt by a really mean or spiteful woman and he’s afraid to let his guard down anymore. It’s easier for him not to not to love rather than feel that hurt.

sheikalana · Answer

Means he's unavailable and not interested in being in a romantic relationship for now.

Booklover_90 · Answer

He’s emotionally unavailable right now. Perhaps he’s heartbroken.

syncheart · Answer

He probably had a bad experience, and now He feels messed up.

Anonymous · Answer

He needs therapy, or it is just a weak excuse.

DARKCLOUD1945X · Answer

He is just looking for a piece of ass without commitment.

Starrrboy · Answer

It's just bullshit to avoid commitment lol..

Shiningtempest · Answer

@n1n1999 I believe when a guy mean when he says he is incapable of love, it could mean he doesn't see himself falling in love.

Djaay · Answer

He doesn't want to bc to many mitigating circumstances dictate otherwise unless proven differently.

DreamLife7 · Answer

It means he does not want you. You're not hot enough to make him fall in love

pickles77 · Answer

It could mean that he is not vulnerable enough or he’s just thinking of himself

Pterodon · Answer

Translated it means “I’m not interested in you unless you just want to fuck”

Anonymous · Answer

long time hurt, insecurities or he's not just into you.

KrakenAttackin · Answer

It means he's not that into you.

citygirlxox · Answer

It means he’s full of shit

rosemilk · Answer

i think that means you should run :)

slatyb · Answer

He's incapable of loving you.

convo_king89 · Answer

He just wants one night stands.

bobby_bush_eater · Answer

It sounds like a cop out to me...

In_Trance · Answer

It means you need to ask for clarification

Anonymous · Answer

He's a loser.

Anonymous · Answer

His penis doesn't work

OddBeMe · Answer

Over dramatic

What does a guy mean when he says he is incapable of love?

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