What does it mean when a guy claims he loves you but isn't ready to be in a relationship because he isn't financially stable?

[hycore]

And tells you he wanted to date other girls he just met in the past. Meanwhile he has known me for over four or five years now.

[_Maya_]

It means he is admitting that the feelings are there but he is being smart and understands what a relationship takes. It isn't all about feelings. If he is looking at it in terms of a potential longterm relationship (think end goal as marriage) he wants things in his own life to be set. That would include finances. When you have things like that to worry about you can't pour your heart and soul into a relationship. You worry. You aren't happy with where you are at in your own life. You have to be satisfied with yourself before you can focus on other people and their happiness. I don't see anything wrong with his approach and don't take this personally. He is doing the right thing.

[WadeKiet]

This is so true! There are too many people who don't see these things when it comes to a relationship...

[hycore]

But he tells me how he wanted to be in a relationship with other women but not me. Why is that?

[_Maya_]

He is saying that he has wanted to be in relationships but can't because his own life is set. I take it to mean he is saying to you that he has wanted this many times but still isn't ready.

[WadeKiet]

Then I think that he is not interested in you. Otherwise he wouldn't say things like that.

[hycore]

He told me of a scenario where he'd have dated a certain woman but he didn't because she was way older. Doesn't that mean he just doesn't want to date me?

[StarWarGirl]

If even after 4 years he is telling he is not ready for relationship means you are not enough for him to make him feel for having relationship. You should move on.

No matter a guy is stable or not but 2 years are like more than enough to decide we could see a relationship coming from this person or not. We want to have relationship with person with this person or now. No matter we are not thinking about it but out heart already feel it. And then after it's not Language that "I'm not ready for relationship". But they say " i would love to have relationship with you could you wait for me this much amount of time".

I personally feel you should move on.

[StarWarGirl]

Because when someone really like someone and could see future together he will be more egar to make himself strong and able to protect you and he himself could not wait.

[bobby_bush_eater]

Honestly sounds like a cop out. If you really love someone than you just be honest about your financial situation and that's that. You can be poor or in debt and love someone. You're 21 how many people do you know that are financially stable? I'm 24 and most people I know aren't. My advice is move on, he's keeping you to the side dangling hope. Sounds like you're his fall back, you deserve better than that.

[kylee2437]

Agreed! Especially because I’m sure he had no problem providing relationship values at one point to make her stay around as long as she did. He most likely just doesn’t want to take responsibility for another persons expectations. I feel like someone feels this way, they need to express that from the very beginning and not lead someone into believing that a relationship will evolve eventually.

[itsclearlynicholas]

I'm not sure yet I totally appreciate the stock image guy's mannerisms in the photo that GAG selected for your question. That guy's vibe, basically answers your question. Some chicks just would make me go like "look away, trail off" with some chicks attitudes 😶😒🫣👀👀 😋

[itsclearlynicholas]

Sadly GAG app says no to uploading photo from gallery. Sigh. Ah well

[MsBell2018]

Run, Sweetie. He's feeding you a line of bull. Move on & let him go & be part of your past & an ex. Go out into the world & find someone that wants to be with you, wants to spend time with you, wants to invest in many many tomorrows with you... every man from your past will fade away like a rain cloud in the sunshine. Don't settle for less. Best of luck.

[Rei13]

You need to move on. Take all the time you need to prepare yourself to let him go, but you need to let him go. He probably does care for you but if he wanted to build a life with you he would. You’re still really young, you will meet other people and make new memories.

[prettygirl20A]

well i mean it just means that the person loves you but won't be able to help you financially which is sometimes what parents desire especially moms of girls desire , for example my mom desires that whoever dates me is able to support me financially or that at least has a job , thats why i know but anyways you should say to him that not being financially stable won't bother you

[Billlewis]

Yes, ma'am, I'd like to invite you to follow me, if that's alright. Thank you very much.

[HawkPerception]

Avoid this guy. The more time you have with a partner you love, the more value you get in your life. He's known you for years and knows that if he dates you who he's known for years, he'll have to be serious, and just wants to play around with girls right now. He's just stringing you along, hoping you'll be there at the end waiting on him. Don't be that girl. Don't bother with a guy that doesn't want to be serious with you if you're looking for something serious.

[kylee2437]

Clearly both of you have two different definition of what love entails. He loves that you have committed to him with him still being able to do what he wants , meanwhile you need commitment to love someone. Incompatibility and the more you comprehend that you two aren’t compatible, the easier it will be for you to move on from this situation

[Paris13]

He is NOT READY----TO Be a Steady Anything. I believe You Deserve Better. He Has made It Clear, Dear, By Saying That That You are Not Top Shelf. Not Even With Money, honey. How Sad... Those Long Years and Everything... I'd Be Contemplating Your own----Future. xxoo

[Tinat]

Well, guys like that like the idea of Love, but! Without commitment. They just like the fact that they can love too, but they don't want you to expect anything from them.
They are just not for anyone who wants a stable and long lasting relationship.🥱

[slatyb]

He's begging you to overlook those problems, and maybe looking for sympathy and support. The question you should be asking is "Does he have a plan? If not, would I be ok if nothing changes?"

[dragoblack]

With all the mind game thinkers making guesses in the comments, I'm going to tell you this... most men are bunt and don't have undertone meanings to their words that mean something else.
Dude has feelings for her, but feels due to social pressure and idealisms, he can't be the breadwinner of the relationship like many say they guy of the relationship should be.

[dragoblack]

Oops, didn't see the extra text. He has been looking around to find someone who he has mutual interest in that will accept his financial situation. At least he is being honest

[IslaTheWitch]

that he loves you but isn't ready to be in a relationship because he isn't financially stable...

this message is quite straightforward...

[Billlewis]

I think that's absolutely wonderful, because he recognizes that a substantial portion of his worth, value and long term viability as a significant other is based on his financial status.

[DreamLife7]

He doesn't like you. His actions aren't matching his words. I don't know why you can't comprehend that. He's not ready for a relationship with you but if his dream girl came along he'd be ready.

[Anonymous]

Wait--he doesn't want to commit because he's not financially stable AND he's telling you he wants to date other girls too? lol! I think you KNOW what this means!

[exitseven]

Pretty much what he says. He is not financially stable for any one of many reasons and it is hard to be in a relationship when you are trying to dig yourself out of that hole.

[BoopBoopBeep]

That he's smart and mature. Being poor sucks and money problems are one of the top three reasons couples fight

[Yannae]

He thinks he might not be able to support you financially. If you like him you let him know that you're probably not going to be moving in right away, which is also a normal thing to do.

[Berethor]

He might be thinking that you a gold digger, it not something uncommon among women.

[alice55]

He just want sex and is taking you for a fool

[magiusX26]

no hidden meaning. we guys tell the facts, not hints.

[JayBones]

It means you are probably high maintenance and he is smart

[red324]

What do finances have to do with dating, especially at 21? 🙄

[imawfulatusernames]

I mean everything, some people are dating for marriage

[Subflics]

It literally means he doesn't have enough money to date you

[jahaims]

It means he is scared of commitment and isn't honest with himself about it

[Minahh]

It means he's bullshitting. Every but you hear coming out of a man's mouth is just an excuse.

[Radiate143]

Girl. Let it go. He's not into you.

[imawfulatusernames]

He isn’t interested in YOU

[KrakenAttackin]

He's a playa player.

[Anonymous]

What can possible be confusing about that.