Why did my friend’s husband do this?

[Anonymous]

One of my friends invited me to join her, her husband, and their friend, along with their friend's fiancé, for dinner.

Due to traffic, I arrived a bit late. When I walked in, I greeted everyone and started chatting with my friend and her husband.

Shortly after my greeting, I noticed my friend's husband smiling and looking over at me to his friend, who was there with his fiancé, and his friend started smiling and nodding at him. It felt quite odd.

Although they could have been discussing anything, I couldn't shake the feeling that they were talking about me. I'm curious about what this could mean. What are your thoughts?

[DoggyDude]

Ask yourself why it matters to you?

People looking at you or looking in your direction, even appearing to be talking about you is, of itself meaningless (because its way easy to feel like everyone is doing that, even strangers); So ask yourself, "why do I care if their talking about me?".

Once you have the answer to that question, that dictates what you should do.

If your just feeling paranoid, meaning you don't think there's some sinister agenda. Laugh it off and move on.

If your concern is for your friend, that maybe her husband is flirting or something like that, just put the first time down to coincidental, and just keep an eye out for some kind of repeating pattern in that area. If it keeps happening to make you very uncomfortable, politely talk to your friend about it. Try not to worry her, just ask her to take it up with her husband and find out whats going on. It's of course very hard to do that, because often wives can feel threatened about other girls noticing their husbands beahviour. So be cautious and don't do that lightly.

If you discover you care because you have some interest of attraction or curiosity of attraction in your wifes husband (just to cover bases) you really need to figure out what you want to do with that yourself. I'll presume its not that, because that seems the least likely here, but don't let that NOT question your interests in that way. Its an easy mistake to presume based on position toward the married ones own interests wouldn't ever sway that direction. If you imagine him single and can still say your interest wouldn't be there, thats the best test.

At the end of the day, it's down to why its important. Hence my stressing it a lot.

[Anonymous]

Maybe they both think you’re hot or cute or something.

[SueShe]

The only way you would have found out is to ask them directly as it happened.

I would not have hesitated to ask "Looks like you are having a good time. Do you mind letting the others know what you are smiling at?".

That would have cut off any misunderstanding. At least that is how I would have settled this issue a diplomatic way.

I think that you are overthinking the entire issue. There is a plethora of possible answers to your question but I don't think that they were making fun of you or to talk about you behind your back.

Furthermore, you don't tell us how the evening went? If the ambiance was odd after their look towards you, then they made fun of you, otherwise, they just made a very common comment and you should forget about it as there is not much to it.

[Anonymous]

I think you might be a little paranoid. Chill out.

[Asker]

I saw it with my own two eyes. No one else noticed but me, I’m just curious that’s all. Not paranoid

[Iron_Man]

You were late so they were discussing it