Am I overreacting?

[Justasking41]

Ok so here goes... My boyfriend is 47 and I came home to find He had gotten an old pair of my daughters shorts and cut them to be pretty much nothing and He was sleeping in them. I flipped out I mean please help me understand why He thinks it would be ok. And why would he want to wear a pair of booty shorts. The fact the were my daughters is what has Me freaking out completely

[SueShe]

This is a huge red flag and something to really worry about.

He probably did not even ask your daughter whether she agreed to have her clothing destroyed for his sole sexual pleasure.

Not only did he misuse her private sphere by either snooping in her closet to get himself a pair of shorts or then he must have taken them out of the laundry basket to use for his perverted fantasies and kinks.

The most worrisome part is that he must probably have pried and spied on her a number of times in order to fulfill his fantasy. One does not just simply go into a person's room to steal clothing but that is something that is developing over time and becomes a sexual fantasy.

Who knows what else he has done in secret and without your knowledge. I would check if he installed a hidden camera somewhere to spy on your daughter.

[Justasking41]

Omg thank you I never even thought about that. I pray that's not the case because I'm not sure I will be able to keep from going to prison

[SueShe]

I hope that there is a good explanation for his behavior but I would also be on my guard from now on. Perhaps a chat with your daughter is something you have to take into consideration.

How old is your daughter? is she still a minor or already an adult?

[Justasking41]

She's only 17 and I want to talk to her about it but can't very well tell her he took her shorts I mean it isn't ok I can't understand why he would want to take her shorts and for damn sure can't see how he could think it was ok to do so

[SueShe]

Of course not. You have to be diplomatic about it. Do you do her laundry? If yes, then tell her that you ruined her shorts in the wash and they were so torn that you did throw them away. Suggest that you will replace them

Also try to ask her surreptitiously if she noticed that her clothes were misplace and (again), take the blame for it because you thought you would rearrange her closet.

Do as if you were at fault and see how she reacts, if she missed her shorts or if she suspects anything.

Good luck.

[Justasking41]

Ok thank you so much for the feed back

[SueShe]

I wish you luck and sincerely hope that you can solve this mystery without it ending it a heartbreak.

[Justasking41]

Me too

[Nikki1989]

No overreaction at all. That would give me the total creeps.

[Justasking41]

Ya I'm sick to my stomache like I can't process this

[hafinjun]

HVing raised to girls it would freak me out to
I don't think I'd be interested in anything but the date he'll be gone. What was he doing with your daughters clothing at all..

[BarryLiverstone]

Hmm very first question? Haven’t answered any other questions. Not really a normal topic… sus

[Justasking41]

No it's far from a normal topic I just came home from work and I'm freaking out. Don't expect everyone or really anyone to understand I'm totally mind blown like wtf

[Billlewis]

No, you're definitely not overreacting.

[Justasking41]

I don't even know what to say to him. I'm discusted and concerned

[Billlewis]

I'm not sure there really is anything you could say to him. I hope you're able to salvage this relationship, but this has the look of something that you either accept, refuse to accept or weigh your options for a while before making a decision. I mean, I'm into some pretty kinky things myself, but I've never done anything involving the clothing of a woman's child. I'm not saying that makes me any better, either, but one thing I'm fairly sure of is that -- unlike most of these kinds of things -- continuing to ask him about it will likely get you nowhere. This is my opinion only.

[Justasking41]

Thanks for responding