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I hit it off well with a guy. We talked often and had good conversation for two months. He was gentle, patient, kind a overall gentleman. We went on a date. We often went on walks/strolls in nice park areas with nice views and water. When sex/intimacy was mentioned he was sure to ask about my boundaries while being honest about his and what he liked when in came to sex/intimacy as well. He texted me often. He called/FaceTimed often. Two months in, we had sex. Before we had sex I told him I wasn’t quite ready because I didn’t want him to act different/treat me differently or be an entirely different guy after we had sex. Of course, he swore he wouldn’t be that way and I didn’t believe him at first but I grew comfortable and trusting with him so it ended up happening. He didn’t ghost me entirely but he might as well had. He doesn’t text as often. His energy over text has changed. He doesn’t call as often and with me being the kind of girl I am I haven’t sweated him about it. Just yesterday I called him. He sent me to voicemail and texted me “Hold on”. And I wasn’t even blowing up his phone. I never do. I call him once every few days, the same amount of times he now calls me but before he contacted me everyday. I left it alone. A few days later he tells me the reason he started acting different was because I had a smell to my vagina which didn’t make sense because I shower, I keep my hygiene up and I get checked. When I asked him how it smelled, at first he said he didn’t know, then he said it smelled fishy. Which would be a strong smell and I would smell it before him, which I don’t/didn’t. A few hours after that I get a text from his number saying “This is the girl that lives with him. Have y’all had sex? I need to know for my personal health.” I then realized why he lied and told me my vagina was smelly and that being the reason why he began to act strange.
Why did he make me feel bad by lying to me rather than just being honest with me?
Anonymous
(30-35) 
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
2Opinion
Ughh girll, I can't believe he tried to pull that weak ass lie on you! What a coward, he shoulda just been real from the jump.
First of all, don't you dare believe for a SECOND that it's something you did. You take care of yourself and he knows it! This jawn is 100% on HIM.
He got scared and played you once he hit, afraid his little girlfriend was gonna find out about his tricks. Pathetic excuse of a man. You deserve so much better babe!
My advice - block and delete his sorry ass on everything! You don't need that toxicity. Bet the bed was feeling real lonely, that's why he tryna crawl back now. Too late fool!
You hold your head up high, mama. His actions say it all about the kinda dude HE is, not you. His loss! Now go find you a real one who appreciates an amazing woman like you deserve.
We all here for you girl! Hit me up anytime if you need a shoulder - I gotchu!
Because most men are pigs and liars that's why he wasn't honest with you. I'm sorry that happened tho
Yea, it’s unfortunate. He had me feeling bad like my vagina really smelled, like he really made me believe that it was ME and not him to save hisself.
Ya he’s lying. He’s not living with a girl
Oh but he does lol he mentioned to me earlier on when I asked him if he had an ex he still messed around with he told me that his ex who still has keys to his place, only still comes over sometimes because she still has things at his place but he swore they weren’t messing around anymore and that if he and I ended up doing anything together that he would stop messing around with her. So another woman is involved but he did lie about the living situation.
Unless she was lying. She said they live together.
Yea , I believe she had his phone. The point is, he made me think I was the problem when really he had a situation going with her and didn’t know how to solve it and get his way out.
I was suggesting another possibility. That he pretended it was her so that he doesn’t have to talk to you again
But what would be the point in that? When he texted and told me that the reason he started acting strange was because my vagina smelled , he called me after and asked what that meant for us and I told him that it was up to him considering he made the comment. He said he still wanted to talk to me and that he wasn’t going anywhere., My phone ended up dying and when I charged it back up, I called and he didn’t answer. A few hours later, I got that text.
The point could be that he wants to pursue someone else and doesn’t wanna hurt you by saying he just used you for sex
I mean if he thought saying my vagina smelled would be easier than saying he used me for sex, that’s weird lol
But guys can be weird.
But I guess it makes a little sense becaye then it’s like “You can’t blame me if I pursue someone else if I tell you and make you believe you have an odor, what guy wants that?”
Thank you for understanding how he may have acted. Yes as you said his pushing the reason for a change as your lack of hygiene causes him to be free to leave and you are less likely to ruin his reputation and gossip. Had he done something else then you may have reacted in a more aggressive way
I mean I assume no other guy has said you have bad hygiene right?
No, I never had that complaint lol and I as I said with the way he described it, I would have smelled it before him and I practice good hygiene, I don’t sleep around, I get checked. He also swore it was white stuff on his penis after we had sex, which I didn’t recall seeing (I guess that was to make the smelly vagina narrative it more believable). When I asked what he meant by white, once again he just couldn’t describe it. That’s when I knew he was lying.
I literally haven’t even been with a guy in a year before I recently did something with him.
Tbh that sounds like he had stuff there because he wasn’t that hygienic. If you know that’s not a pattern on your end then you are able to understand why he’s lying
Yea it’s all making sense. The last thing I texted him before the text from his ex was “We can be cool. We don’t have to see where this goes. We can just be friends. You telling me that has changed the dynamic of things.” Even though I know my body more than him lol so he did a great job of painting that narrative so that he could exit the situation with no residue lol. Otherwise, the word around town would be that he’s a dog but I can’t do that if he tells me that my bad hygiene is the reason he pretty much ghosted me because what girl would spread that kind of gossip about herself? He has to continue using the same method on other girls to get them in bed.
True, if you sent that it was an exit plan for him. Did you fall in love or did you only see him as a friend?
I didn’t fall in love with him but I did grow to like him but I feel after this the person I grew to like wasn’t even really him lol
Of course you would question his integrity. He broke the implied trust. And I know you trusted him because you had sex which meant possibly he would raise a child with you.
Yea. I did trust him. He literally told me that I was a “Tough cookie to crack.” Implying that I wasn’t easy and he had to put in effort and he swore he liked that about me. Which he may have very will did but once he figured out what he had to do to crack the code with me, that was it.
He used it to his advantage.
Seems like you learned a few lessons
I feel like guys always see me as the girl they can settle down with later in life but they don’t realize that by then I would have found a truly genuine guy that’s for me after they have done their sleeping around lol
That implies you compare and possibly compete with other girls. If you are going to valuable guys that could be why. But are there reasons you don’t see yourself as a catch and someone a guy needs to work for to win for his life?
Probably off topic. Not related to your original q
I’m not sure I understand, can you explain what you mean?
What exactly do you mean by competing and comparing myself to other girls?
Go ahead and follow me on here. I’ll lay it out